A Good Man
by TawnyShyrell
Summary: McGee has always been the quiet one with a good family. What happens when a blast from his past comes to challenge that preconceived notion? How will the team view their friend & what danger lies hidden beneath it all?
1. Chapter 1

This is my first NCIS fanfic. After reading some amazing stories on here, I got inspired. This story is complete. I should be able to post a chapter a day (work schedule permitting). Reviews and constructive criticism are always welcome.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of NCIS (except the series DVD - LOL!)

Please enjoy!

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><p>Leroy Jethro Gibbs sat at his desk, enjoying the momentary silence. His team had just wrapped up a lengthy case and only had the paperwork left to do. Gibbs looked around the bullpen. Anthony DiNozzo was at his desk, actually working on his report. The other two desks were empty for the moment. Timothy McGee &amp; Ziva David were delivering the last of the physical evidence to lock up.<p>

He brought his attention back to his own report. Yeah, the down time was going to be nice and rightly deserved.

The main elevator gave a "ding", alerting Gibbs to outside company. Always curious about what other teams might be doing, he lifted eyes to see who would be coming out of the elevator and was surprised at what he saw, three men in Air Force uniforms exited accompanied by a security guard.

He was even more surprised when the security guard pointed the three towards Gibbs. As the men walked over, Gibbs stood. That famous gut of his telling him that, whatever this was, it was not going to be good.

DiNozzo noticed his Boss stand up, but before he could ask the three airmen were at Gibbs' desk.

"Are you Special Agent Gibbs?"

Gibbs looked over the man that had addressed him. He was dress with Staff Sergeant's markings, about five foot eight, clear hazel eyes, light brown hair barely visible under the cap he wore as part of his uniform. "Yes, I am. What is it that I can do for the Air Force today?" He tried to sound non-defensive, but it was a gut reaction when a different branch of the military came into your stomping grounds.

"I am Staff Sergeant Roger Ferris. This is Senior Airmen, Aaron Williams," the dark skinned soldier on the left nodded, "and Airman First Class James Settie," the one on the right nodded. "We are here for Timothy McGee."

Gibbs narrowed his eyes. "Why?" This time he made no attempt to hide the dangerous tone in his voice. This made DiNozzo decide to stand up as well.

The two airmen behind Staff Sergeant Ferris exchanged confused glances. Roger replied, "You mean you haven't been informed?"

Gibbs opened his mouth to respond, but Tim and Ziva came around the corner.

"Ziva, it's not that big of a deal, really."

"McGee, she seems to be a nice girl and she is definitely interested."

"Ziva, I'm just not ready ..." McGee stopped dead in his tracks, halfway past his desk.

Roger had turned to look at him while he was walking into the bullpen. He took a step forward, "Hey Tim." His voice was gentile and hesitant.

McGee took one step back, "Roger ... W-what." He stopped and tried again with a little more force to his voice. "What are you doing here?"

Ziva looked from Roger to McGee. She was going to ask Tim about his friend, until she took a good look at his eyes. McGee was terrified, not just scared, but absolutely terrified. Ziva scowled and stepped in-between McGee and Roger.

DiNozzo had also noticed the terror in McGee's eyes immediately on seeing Roger. He didn't get a good feeling about this guy before, now he down right didn't like him. Trying to get Tim's attention off of the guy, he asked a question of his friend. "So, you guys know each other?"

McGee nodded slowly, never taking his eyes off of Roger. It was Roger who responded, "Yeah, we went to school together."

DiNozzo had a very bad feeling about that little piece of information. He looked over to Gibbs and found the same feeling reflecting on his boss' face. Tony needed confirmation, "MIT?"

McGee still never took his eyes off Roger, he wasn't even blinking, but actually voiced a response. "El-elementary."

Gibbs didn't like anyone to intimidate his team, unless it was him, but this went beyond intimidation. McGee looked like a scared rabbit ready to bolt. Gibbs couldn't help but feel angry. He had brought McGee onto his team as a very, very green rookie and had watched him develop into one hell of an agent. He would never admit it out loud, but watching Tim grow as an agent was like watching Kelly learn and explore her potential. To hear him stutter, something he hadn't done for years, showed just how afraid he was and it was making Gibbs blood boil.

Roger, had also not taken his eyes off of McGee. "Tim, we're here to take you into protective custody." He took another step forward.

McGee took another step back. While DiNozzo and Gibbs exchanged glances. _Protective custody?_

"_**You**_, protect _**me**_?" McGee's voice dripped with sarcasm.

"Please Tim, it's for your own good." Roger took another step forward, now bumping into Ziva, but still had his eyes glued to McGee.

"My own good? You mean like last time!" McGee also, took another step backwards, his voice was starting to gain volume and pitch.

Roger closed his eyes, realizing his mistake in wordage. "Tim, I ..."

"No!" McGee yelled, practically screamed, bringing everyone on the floor to a stand still. "I'm not going anywhere with you!"

"I'm going to have to agree with you." A voice projected down from above them, however, nobody bothered to look at Director Leon Vance as he came down to the bullpen. "Staff Sergeant Ferris, tell me why the Air Force feels the need to tell me what do with one of my agents."

Roger hated to break eye contact with McGee, but he knew he needed to address the NCIS director. He turned half way to face Vance, "We have a case and evidence suggests that Tim may be in danger."

DiNozzo took this time to work his way over to McGee and reached out to touch his arm. Tim jerked back as if Tony's touch had burned him, "Whoa, easy buddy, it's just me."

"T-Tony? Sorry, I didn't mean ..." McGee's eyes were so full of raw emotions, hurt, anger, fear, and ... shame? _Why shame?_

"No problem Tim." DiNozzo reached back out and grabbed McGee's upper right arm and this time, Tim let him make contact.

Vance narrowed his eyes, he didn't like anyone telling him that he couldn't protect his own, "What evidence?"

Roger gave a glance back to Tim, "Sir, you have received the orders from my commanding officer and the preliminaries of our case." He really didn't want to get the specifics of the case with a floor full of agents listening.

"Yes, Staff Sergeant, I do and I already have my people looking at it. What we can't seem to find is a connection to either this agency or to Agent McGee. Now, unless you show me that connection, you are not walking out of here with my agent."

Roger sighed, he knew this was going to be hard on McGee without all of his co-workers finding out about what had happened all those years ago. He took a quick look around the bullpen. Roger had checked up on the team, so he knew who they were. Ziva David, former Mossad Officer, hadn't stopped scowling at Roger and looked like she was ready to show him exactly everything she learned in Mossad. Anthony DiNozzo, ex-cop and senior field agent, was totally focused on Tim, trying hard to keep him grounded in the here and now. Then there was Leroy Jethro Gibbs, team leader, who looked more like a very, very, very pissed off parent than a team leader.

Roger almost smiled. _Tim is definitely going to need the support, ..._ "Is there somewhere more private we can talk?"

Vance nodded. He looked over to DiNozzo and David and gave a short jerk towards the inner elevators.

Both nodded. Tony gave McGee's arm a quick squeeze, "Come on Tim"

McGee gave a weak nod and the two started walking to the elevator. Ziva didn't move until the doors opened. She never took her eyes off of Roger until the elevator doors closed.

The Airmen went to move, but Vance stopped them. "Wait."

Vance, Gibbs and the Air Force men all watched as Ziva led the way while DiNozzo guided McGee down the hall. Tony had kept a hold of Tim's arm and was quietly talking, not letting Tim get lost in the terror of his memories.

Once Vance was sure his three agents were in his office, he turned back to the others. "Alright." He turned around and headed towards his office.

The Airmen followed, with Gibbs bringing up the rear. Airman Williams noticed the small smirk on his superior's face and was confused. This protection detail was defiantly not going the way it should. Why would the Staff Sergeant be smiling? "Sir?"

Roger gave his subordinate a quick glance as they walked up the stairs. "It's good to see the kid finally get some support. Lord knows, he's never had any when we were growing up." The airman nodded back.

Gibbs overheard the Staff Sergeant's comment and gave a puzzled frown. He always thought McGee had a supportive loving family and Tim did nothing to dissuade that belief. It's the reason he always kept a step back with Tim. Tony, Ziva, even Abby, needed a parental figure and Gibbs was compelled to filled that need. But, McGee … Gibbs had never wanted to interfere with a good family. He was just as proud of McGee as his other 'kids', in some ways more, because of how far he had to come to reach his goal. He knew McGee looked up to him, but Gibbs made sure to keep it as a mentor, not a father figure, Tim didn't need one. To think that he might have been wrong ...

_No. The Staff Sergeant must be talking about something else._


	2. Chapter 2

Thank you to all who have either added this as a story alert or who have already given reviews. I hope I do not disappoint!

Usual disclaimer: I own nothing, just having fun.

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><p>In the Director's office, forensic scientist Abby Sciuto and medical examiner, Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard sat looking over the Air Force file that Vance had given them only an hour ago.<p>

"Ducky, what does this have to do with NCIS? I mean these are awful crimes, but ..." Abby whined as she looked through the crime scene forensic reports.

"I understand your confusion, Abigail, but I know as much and as little as you do." Ducky replied as he went through the autopsy reports. "But somewhere in here is a connection and it has been given to us to find it."

"But, Ducky ..." Before Abby could get started on her rant, the door opened.

They both turned, expecting to see the director, and were surprised to see Ziva instead.

Ducky started to give one of his warm greetings, but stopped when DiNozzo and McGee came in behind her. He took a moment to look the two over and could clearly see that Tony was holding onto McGee both physically and, by the soft tone in which he was talking, mentally. Warnings were going off in the good doctor's head. He might not have the 'infamous gut' of Gibbs, but he was no fool. He had a sinking feeling that the NCIS connection to the Air Force file had just walked into the room.

Abby, happy to see her friends, wasn't as quick to pick up on the mood of the trio. "Hey guys! Tim ... What's wrong? You look like you need a hug!" She popped out of her chair and bounded over to the group.

The sudden movement caught McGee's attention. As hard as he was trying, Roger coming back into his life was really throwing him off balance. With Abby rushing towards him, old reflexes took over. Run, flight vs. fight. McGee paused and took a step backwards.

Ziva noticed this out of the corner of eye and again stood in front of McGee, having Abby rush straight into her. "Ziva!"

"Abby, I think it would be best to wait." Ziva was trying to sound firm without being threatening. After all Abby was not the enemy.

"Why? Timmy, are you okay?"

When McGee took his step back, Tony had grabbed on a little tighter. "Easy McGee. It's just Abby. You up for a crush-your-ribs hug?" He was trying to keep what he was saying light-hearted, for McGee's sake.

"Abby?" Tim sounded as if he were in a fog.

"Yeah, McSilly. Your all time favorite Goth girl."

McGee seemed to clear from the fog. "Oh, okay."

Abby had been watching the interaction over Ziva's shoulder. She looked to all of them. "Hey, what's going on?" She was starting to worry.

It was McGee who answered her. "Sorry Abby. I just had a bit of a shock. If you still want, a hug would be nice."

"Of course I still want! Who would ever pass up an authentic Timothy McGee hug!" She knew something big had happened. The tone to McGee's voice, it sounded so defeated. She didn't like it. She stepped around Ziva to give Tim a very supportive hug.

DiNozzo release McGee's arm so that he could get the full effective of an Abby hug, but as he tried to pull away, Tim grabbed his jacket sleeve. Tony looked over to the two. With the combat boots Abby wore, she was actually as tall as McGee. She was wrapped around his chest with her chin resting on Tim's left shoulder, facing away from Tony.

McGee's responding hug was stiff as he wrapped his left arm around Abby's waist. He had laid his head on her shoulder and closed his eyes. McGee's grip tightened on Tony's sleeve as she hugged tighter. That's when DiNozzo realize that McGee was acting on reflex. For some reason, Abby's embrace was upsetting him and he was using Tony as his grounding.

In spite of the situation, Tony allowed himself a small smile. McGee's unconscious act of trust made him feel good for a couple of seconds until he realized what it meant. It meant that Tim was scared, really scared, and he was hoping that Tony would be there to have his six. _And, that's exactly what I'm going to do_, he thought as the serious expression returned to his face.

"Tim, what's this all about?" Abby asked as she squeezed tighter.

"Abigail, dear, why don't we let Timothy have a seat before we start interrogating him?" Ducky suggested, also keeping his tone light.

"Good idea. Come on Tim." DiNozzo gently tugged the arm that McGee was attached to.

McGee untangled himself from Abby, gave a slight nod and a weak smile to everyone, and once again let Tony guide him.

Ducky set a glass of water down where he figured McGee would be sitting. Tony never tried to detach McGee from his arm, so he was sitting to the right. Ziva took the seat to the left. This disappointed Abby, she wanted to be sitting next to Tim. The door opening once again, stopped her protests.

This time it was indeed Director Vance, followed by the three Airmen, with Gibbs coming in last. Abby, who had been left standing when the trio sat down, grabbed onto Gibbs' arm as he walked by. She went to ask him what was going on, but he gave her a sad look and shook his head. She knew he had no answers for her. They sat down opposite the other three, Abby maked sure to be in the middle. That way, not only was she between two of her favorite older gentlemen, but right across from Tim.

Vance waited until everyone had settled, he stayed standing. "Alright, Staff Sergeant, present your case."


	3. Chapter 3

Thank you for all of the wonderful reviews!  
>These chapters look longer on my word processor than when I post on here. I had originally wanted to have the entire scene in the director's office as one chapter, but when I realized just how long it was, I decided it was best to break it a part. I hope this only adds to the thrill of reading it.<p>

Any way - on with the show. As always, I own nothing ... my bank account can a test to that! lol

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><p>Roger nodded and walked around the table, very carefully avoiding McGee's side. He came behind Abby to reach for the files and remote, "Excuse me miss. May I?"<p>

Abby noticed everyone's demeanor become down right threatening when the airman come close. She just nodded to him as he took the files.

Roger returned to the front of the group, his two subordinates staying closer to the door. They were there for the protection detail so they stayed out of the way.

"Okay, the best place to start is where we think this began, before the Air Force became involved." Roger took a deep breath. _This is going to be the hard part for me, to finally admit what I've done._ "Please keep in mind, that all of these ... torments were what we had done to Tim in school."

Abby and Ducky shared a concerned glance. They had been going over the file and probably knew it better than the Airmen. Now knowing that McGee was the connection, set the two of them on high alert as well.

Roger noticed that the pretty Goth and the older gentleman were both now glaring at him. It took all of his military training to suppress a smile. _Good the more help he has, the better. They just better be worth the trust I'm about to place in them._

He clicked the remote and the first photo came up on Vance's screen, "Meet Timothy Abbott. Janitor for Harrison High School in Spring Hope, North Carolina. Three months ago he was found shoved in a locker, stabbed in the heart."

DiNozzo gave a quick glance to McGee. "Okay, besides for the Freddy Krueger action, that's a pretty standard bullying tactic. What makes you think this is tied to McGee?"

Roger put the next photo up on the screen. "You'll see. On month later, Timothy Broeren. Director of the Roanoke Rapids, North Carolina chapter of the YMCA, found tied to the wrong side of the high dive ladder with his throat slit."

Tony sighed, "Again ..."

This time Roger kept going, bringing up another photo. "Two weeks after that, Timothy Connelly. The head of the local chapter of the Boy Scouts in Norfolk, Virginia. Tied to a tree with an arrow thru his right shoulder." Roger paused and looked at Tim.

DiNozzo glanced over to McGee when Roger looked at him. McGee had grabbed his right should when the picture was shown, his breathing increasing in rate. Eyes lost in the horror of the past looked at Roger. One thing that hadn't changed was that Tim's eyes were an open book to those who took the time to learn to read them.

"Did any of you know that Tim used to be ambidextrous?" Roger took a moment to note the blank looks of the NCIS agents. "That is until we did that to him." He pointed to the picture again. "He had to remain in a sling for the rest of the year, and use his left hand for everything, I guess it stuck."

Everyone gave a quick look to McGee, hoping that he would tell him that Roger was wrong. Just one look at the terrified and lost expression on Tim face, they all knew it was true. They returned to Roger with even more anger than before.

"The arrow is not how Mr. Connelly died. He was stabbed thru the stomach. The arrow was added after he died. It was window dressing ... a message." He took a moment to give them a hard look trying to get them to understand just how much danger Tim was in.

Ziva was fuming. She knew that McGee had his share of bullying, but he made it seem like it wasn't that significant. _How could he down play something like this!_ _No wonder he didn't want to go any where with his past classmate._ However, there was something else bothering her right now. "I do not see the connection to the Air Force."

Roger took a moment. This is it. Was he really ready for this ... was Tim? With McGee his only concern, he pressed ahead. This time he looked only at Tim.

"Meet our fourth victim, Captain Timothy Dugan of Langley Air Force Base in Virginia." The picture was of an Air Force captain who had been thrown down into a make shift well. At the bottom, with the captain's body, were the carcasses of various dead animals all in different stages of decomposition and maggots, lots of maggots.

Tim drew in a loud breath and forgot to let it out. He was staring at Roger, then to the plasma and back again. He knew what was coming next, he just knew. "Roger ..."

Tony didn't give Roger a chance to respond. He has no right to be addressing McGee. "Okay, I get that there is definitely a pattern here, with the whole everyone is named Tim, but I think every bully at every school does something similar. Why do you think this has any ties to our Tim."

Roger slowly closed his eyes and reopened them, again only looking at Tim. "It's what was done to each victim before they died."

The flood gates of long ago locked away feelings broke loose and McGee got swept along in the flood. "Oh my god! Roger, all of them? I mean ... are you sure?"

"Yes, all of them. Tim, I'm sorry I ..." He made the mistake of taking a step towards Tim.

McGee shot straight up out of his chair when Roger took a step forward, waves of fear coming off of him. "Oh god!" He couldn't stay there in front of everyone, he had to get away_._ Tim bolted for the door. Overwhelming feelings of both past and present over took his mind and the only thing he could think of was to leave, to get as far away as he could.

Roger thought this might happen, how could it not. This has been a mistake telling him like this. Roger motioned for one of his men to follow. Airman Williams nodded and went out.


	4. Chapter 4

This chapter is longer than the last two, so hang in there with me ...

I have been advised of my rights ... I own nothing of NCIS ... just the characters I have created for the story! LOL

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><p>The whole room had stood right after McGee did. They were confused, what could have possibly spooked their friend so badly. When he bolted out the door, they were all too stunned to make a move to stop him. That was quickly replaced with anger.<p>

DiNozzo and Gibbs had started moving at the same moment, but Tony reached Roger first. "What did you do to him!" He growled as he grabbed Roger by the collar.

"I didn't. I just held him down while ..."

"While what!"

A loud sob escaped from Abby. She looked at Ducky in horror. They knew what had happened to each of the victims, in very graphic detail. "No way! Not Timmy! How could someone do that to him!" Tears streaked down her face.

Ducky pulled her into a hug, but for once he had nothing to say.

Gibb's gut was working over time. For McGee to have run, Abby to have burst into tears and Ducky to be speechless, this didn't bode well for his youngest agent. "Ducky, what happened to all of the victims?"

Ducky turned a sad and devastated face to Gibbs and just shook his head. He couldn't find a way to put words to it. Without the words, it couldn't be real and that was fine with him this time.

However, the rest of Timothy's team was having none of it. Ziva turned to Ducky. "Just tell us." She hissed very coldly. Everyone knew that this was Ziva at her most dangerous, it was lucky for Roger that she didn't carry her throwing knives anymore.

Ducky opened his mouth and closed it again. _How do I tell them?_

"Duck, just spit it out." Gibbs said in the most even voice he could.

Ducky sighed, there was no easy way to put this, so better just to be out with the facts. He looked directly into Gibbs ice blue eyes. "All of the victims were sexually assaulted before they were murdered."

That snapped the small reserve of self control DiNozzo had. "You son-of-a-bitch!" Tony yelled and swung his right fist at the same time, connecting very satisfyingly on Roger's jaw. "How could you hold him down while ... while someone ... You son-of-a ..." Tony went in for another swing.

Vance had been watching from the back of the room while the Staff Sergeant had filled them in. He too, becoming more and more enraged at each picture. He had taken a shine to Agent McGee and knew he was going to go far with NCIS, given the proper nudging. He had plans for that boy. Hearing something so painful coming up from McGee's past and realizing that his agent could very well be in the danger that the Air Force seemed to think, was difficult for Vance.

When McGee had bolted through the door with one of the airmen following, Vance took this opening to keep NCIS in the loop. He called down to another team leader, "Agent Brooks, Agent McGee is heading out of my office followed by an Airman. Please following them and make sure nothing happens to McGee ... No, he's not in trouble, under protective custody. Yes, protective custody. Listen, ..." Vance had to pause when, he too heard Ducky's explanation. _Damn!_ "Brooks, I'll fill you in later, just keep an eye on McGee."

Vance had quickly hung up when DiNozzo hit the Sergeant. He knew no one else was going to stop Tony, hell, **HE **didn't want to stop him, but, as the director of NCIS, he couldn't let this go on. He stepped forward to grab his enraged agent, while Airman Settie also stepped in between his superior and the agents.

"Agent DiNozzo! Stand down!" Vance yelled as Tony got ready to take his second swing.

Tony showed no sign of hearing him as he pulled against the director in order to take his second hit. "I said stand down! Do you really want to put me in a position to have to pull you from this case?"

That stopped him, just as Vance knew it would. He knew none of McGee's team would want to stray far.

Roger stood up, actually quite pleased with the team's reaction. _Good. These people will stand by Tim. Now, let's see if they're ready to hear the rest._

"How, oh it was easy." Roger reached down and found the old attitude from when he was Tim's nemesis. He stood straight and looked each of them in the eyes. "It was easy picking on the kid that nobody wanted. We knew we would never get in trouble."

"What do you mean nobody wanted? I'm sure McGee's parents ..." Gibbs' voice was soft as he was barley containing his growing anger.

"No sir. Captain McGee was very ... obvious about how he felt about his son." Roger's attitude was slipping as he remember his childhood with the years of life experience he now had. "I over heard him talking to my Dad once. Asked if he would trade me for Tim." Roger gave an incredulous laugh. "My dad laughed and said no way, he wouldn't give up fine stock for the shallow end of the gene pool." Roger shook his head sadly.

Tony took a moment to swallow some of his anger. He remembered when he had said something similar. It was when McGee was trying to protect his little sister from being charged with murder. _I wonder how much I'm like those guys to Tim. I never meant ... _

"No way! Timmy's smart and sweet and kind and ... and ... There's no way that his parents weren't proud of him!" Abby protested.

"Normal parents would have been bursting with pride with a son like Tim. But for Captain McGee, it was all about having a military son, someone to follow in his foot steps. Even Tim's mother was military, a nurse. It was apparent pretty quickly that Tim wasn't going to be military, especially not the Navy."

The room was silent as the truth sunk in to each of them.

Roger took a moment to look at each of the stunned faces before continuing. "Tim was the youngest of his grade. He was teased by those in his own grade, it didn't get real bad until he skipped a grade, into mine, fifth, he would have been nine." Roger was getting a chill down his back thinking about things he hadn't for years.

"Timmy skipped two grades." Abby corrected. She didn't like this guy thinking he knew more about Tim than she did.

Roger shook his head, "Not at the same time. The first jump was into fifth grade, that's when ..." Roger paused. Remembering this was hard for him, he wondered how Tim was handling it.

"When what?" Ziva growled at him.

"That's when we all met Theodore McGrory. He was older than us, he had been held back from sixth grade. He saw us picking on Tim one day and decided to join in. He quickly became the leader of our group. It was just the same old stuff at first, but Theodore became obsessed with Tim. As his obsession grew, so did the level of torment."

"Staff Sergeant, what do you mean he became obsessed with Timothy? In what way?" Ducky's voice was clinical. He was trying to keep his emotions out of the situation. There were enough running rampant in the room, he felt the need to be the voice of calm ... for now.

"I mean completely and utterly obsessed." Roger visibly shivered. "He felt that he and Tim were two sides of the same person."

"What?" Gibbs looked over to Ducky to see if he had any answers for such a bizarre statement.

"Please explain further." Ducky nodded towards Roger.

"Theodore believed that he and Tim were connected, fated to find each other. To Theodore, Tim was the heads to his tails, the light to his dark, the yin to his yang, the good to his evil."

Ziva scowled. "Why?"

"Well, there's the name similarity, Timothy McGee & Theodore McGrory, no middle name for either. Tim was advanced a grade, Theodore was held back. Tim was shy, quiet and polite. Theodore was brash, loud and rude." Roger paused as the memories of Theodore washed over him.

"Is that it? That's why this guy was obsessed?" DiNozzo asked incredulously.

Roger shook his head. "Do you know that M is the thirteenth letter of the alphabet? The number thirteen has significance in may cultures, not all are bad. Theodore said this showed that thirteen was both good and evil, just like he and Tim. Also, their birthdays are complete opposites." He again and saw confused faces. "Tim's birthday is November 15th, which makes it the 319th day of the year with 46 days left. Theodore's birthday is February 15th, the 46th day of the year, with 319 to go."

"You guys sure knew a lot about Tim." DiNozzo menaced towards Roger.

"Not us, Theodore. As I said, obsessed. The more he learned about Tim, the more obsessed he got. The worse the bulling got. Theodore always said that good would come back from anything evil would throw at it. I guess that should have been my first clue that this was going to get out of hand. We were in a battle of good and evil, and I was on the wrong side." Roger shook his head at himself.

"It's like Unbreakable." Tony said in dismay.

"DiNozzo ..." Gibbs said with warning in his voice.

Tony was too upset to notice. "No seriously! Samuel L. Jackson's 'Mr. Glass' is looking for the complete opposite of himself so that his own existence makes sense. So he causes massive accidents just to see if someone will survive. It's ..."

Gibbs gave him a head slap to stop him. The hit was unusually soft. Gibbs knew this was upsetting everyone, but he didn't want to lose focus. "This isn't a movie DiNozzo."

Tony opened his mouth to respond, but it was Ducky who replied. "This may not be Jethro, but what Anthony is saying is a valid psychological assessment. This Theodore fixated on our Timothy because of both the similarities and the differences. One can't exist without the other. For someone who is trying to validate his reason for being alive, and the right psychological issues, this is a very powerful motivator."

"Are you trying to defend him Duck?" Gibbs was shocked.

"No, not at all! How could you even think such a thing! I'm merely trying to understand where this Theodore is coming from. If we can understand that then maybe we can figure out what his next move is going to be before it can affect Timothy!" Ducky ended with his voice raised, something that didn't happen very often.

Gibbs knew he had crossed the line, but he was reeling from everything Roger had told them. For Gibbs, the worst part was finding out about Tim's parents. _Who wouldn't be proud to call Tim their son? He may not have been military material, but Tim has accomplished so much. If he were my son ..._

Ziva was ready to tear into this guy. "So you just held him down while this Theodore assaulted him and did nothing! How could you not have known something was horribly wrong when you undressed him!"

"Because we had done it before, Ma'am." Roger kept his voice steady, as if he was giving a sit-rep to a superior.

"You WHAT!" Tony's anger was coming back in force.

"We would strip him often, it was a way to add to the humiliation. Sometimes we would throw his clothes into a stream so that he would have to put them on soaking wet. Sometimes we would just destroy his clothes so he would have to go home naked. Other times we would cover him in mud and he would have to put them on clean while he was filthy. It also gave us easy access for when we would give him lashes, or ..."

"ENOUGH!" Abby half screamed, half cried. Everyone turned to look at her. "How could you? How could you do any of that to Timmy!" Abby was completely bereft and was shaking. She covered her ears. "I can't stand to hear any more!"

Gibbs walked over to Abby and pulled her into a supportive embrace. Abby cried into Gibbs chest. He to wanted to stop the onslaught of information and go find his agent, but Roger wasn't done.

He continued as if Abby hadn't interrupted him, lost in his own memories. "I wasn't even looking at either Tim or Theodore. I was just holding his left arm to the ground. I didn't know what was going on until Tim cried out in pain. By that time, he didn't do that more. I turned to look at what was going on, I couldn't understand what I was seeing ... Theodore was on top of him and I could feel Tim vibrating in pain as Theodore ..." Roger paused to swallow and take a deep breath. "He cried out only the once and then buried his face in the ground. When Theodore was done, he leaned over and whispered something in Tim's ear. He then got up and told us to throw Tim into that pit." Roger waived his hand towards the last picture. "Tim was dead weight as we tossed him in and that was the last time we saw him."

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><p>Author Note: I realize that I used the actor's birthday instead of the character's birthday. It fit better for the story, so I am taking some creative license. I hope that doesn't bother anyone too much. Let me know what you think!<p> 


	5. Chapter 5

I wanted to give a special thanks to 68luvcarter for pointing out a major blunder, which I corrected ... I think ... if I figured out how to do it properly ... I'm no McGee.

Also, I am having trouble with the horizontal ruler, so on with the story ...

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><p>The rest of the team was in too much stock to say anything, the only sound was Abby's muffled cries.<p>

Vance took over, "What do you mean 'last time' you saw him."

Roger gulped down another deep breath. "That happened on a Friday, so we knew we wouldn't see Tim anymore over the weekend. When Monday came and he wasn't in school, we became uneasy. We went to the hole to make sure that Tim had actually gotten out of it. By Wednesday, we were completely freaked out, especially Theodore. This was the first time Tim hadn't come back from the abuse. You would think Theodore would be happy that he had finally triumphed over Tim, but he wasn't. Part of his obsession was that he thought of Tim as a superhero, able to bounce back from anything."

"Unbelievable!" Ziva hissed.

"By Friday, Theodore was absolutely frantic. We went to Tim's house and tried to convince his mother that we were friends bringing homework for Tim, she refused us, said he was sick and that she wouldn't risk our parents getting mad at her if we got sick too." Roger gave a breathy chuckle. "By the following week, Theodore was on an absolute rampage. Even tried to break into the McGees' house."

Gibbs had found his voice. "He tried to break in?"

"Yeah, he wanted to 'check up' on Tim."

Tony snorted.

"There was only a month left to the school year. Tim never came back. When the school year ended, Theodore marched over to the McGee's to get answers and found that they were gone. They had moved sometime during the last week of school. Theodore went totally ballistic. He ranted and raved about having to find Tim, that he needed Tim to be whole, and that he wouldn't stop until he and Tim could be 'one' again."

Roger looked first at Vance, then to Gibbs. "Theodore himself is still in prison, but I think that one of the other guys in our group is behind this. Do you understand now how much danger Tim is in? Why he needs protective custody?"

Both Vance and Gibbs nodded. Vance went back to his desk and picked up his phone and dialed. "Sit-rep." Vance listen and nodded. "Thank you." He hung up and turned to look at Gibbs. "Your agent is sitting on a bench in the park five blocks from here."

Gibbs nodded and gave Abby a firm squeeze. She looked up at him with child like eyes, desperate for Gibbs to bring the world back into order. He smiled very softly to her, gave her another squeeze and let go.

"You and Duck go back over those files to see if there is anything new that stands out now." Abby nodded and looked towards Ducky. He held out his arms and Abby transferred easily into them.

"DiNozzo, David! Start compiling info on the vics. Start looking for anything else that might have connected them. I want a full report when I get back." Gibbs had been walking through Vance's office as he gave out his instructions for his team.

"When is that going to be, Boss?" DiNozzo asked with a quiet voice, he was emotionally spent.

Gibbs paused at the door. He turned to look at his team. "When ever he's ready." Gibbs turned and left.

XXXX

Gibbs slowly walked to the park. He needed to gather his thoughts and emotions if he was going to be any good to McGee.

He thought he knew everything about his people and could read any of them like a book. Especially McGee his eyes always gave him away. It's one of the reason that Gibbs never sent Tim on undercover missions, he worried McGee would give himself away with just a look.

Any time they would bring up McGee's family, it was usually to say how lucky he was to have such good parents. McGee would just give a small smile but, now looking back, he would say very little. Everyone thought this was him being polite, to not rub into his less fortunate co-works what they had missed out on.

_Why would he let us think that?_ Gibbs actually felt lied to, something he would never have thought would happen with McGee. He paused. This was like when Sarah was a murder suspect. Gibbs' wasn't mad about the actions McGee had taken to protect his sister, he was mad that Tim hadn't come to him. Anytime any of them were in trouble, they were supposed to come to him first. However, Tim felt that he had to go it alone, he 'couldn't take the chance' that someone else wouldn't protect his sister.

That's when it hit Gibbs. McGee hadn't been lying, per say, but handling everything on his own because he had always been on his own. Gibbs realized that McGee had learned very early not to depend on anyone when things got bad.

_Well that's going to change._ Gibbs now knew that Tim needed a father figure as much as any of the others, and he was going to fill that roll just as easily. It wouldn't be that hard for Gibbs because even though he had tried to keep his distance, he had failed. He looked at Tim as his youngest, not just his youngest agent, but **his **youngest. It made him overly protective, another reason why Tim didn't get undercover assignments.

Gibbs resumed walking, picking up his pace. Now that he knew what he needed to do, he just wanted to get to Tim as quickly as possible.

XXXX

Gibbs walked into the park, it was a favorite for a lot of the NCIS agents. It was close by but still very tranquil. He easily found his agent. McGee was sitting on a bench facing a fountain. Airman Williams and Agent Brooks were a couple of feet back standing under a tree one on either side of the bench.

Gibbs nodded to each of them and made his way to the bench. McGee was sitting there, just staring at the fountain, arms resting beside him, looking completely lost.

Gibbs cleared his throat to get McGee's attention. When Tim looked up, Gibbs could see the fog in his eyes clear. Yup, his eyes always gave him away. "Can I join you?"

McGee turned back to the fountain. "Sure Gibbs."

He paused before sitting down. _Gibbs? When was the last time he called me Gibbs? That isn't a good sign_. He put it aside, for now. He sat there, just watching the fountain along with McGee. He knew better than to rush his agent.

After about ten minutes, Gibbs' patience was rewarded. "I guess you know it all, hun?" McGee's voice was heavy with forced control.

"Yeah." Gibbs ran his right hand through his hair and shifted to turn towards McGee, placing his left arm on the bench behind him. However, before he could begin, Tim started.

'I've been thinking. Between me and Roger we will know the most about the background on these crimes, I'll even bet that Roger has forgotten some things that I'll remember ... and I can work quicker than Cyber-crimes. Don't get me wrong, they're good, but they don't always know what to look for, not being field agents and all. Also ..."

Gibbs was stunned. McGee was trying to plead his case to stay working on this. _Why does he feel the need to?_ It took a moment for what Tim said next to sink in.

" ... and when the case is over I won't give you any trouble. If you want me to go back to Cyber-crimes, or even back to Norfolk. If that's still to close, I can go to any of the other NCIS field offices, that is if Vance even lets me stay part of NCIS."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Who said anything about sending you any where?" _Where was all of this coming from?_

"I didn't act like an agent today, I'm sure I embarrassed you and Director Vance. Plus, once the scuttlebutt gets out about this, it'll bring down not only the team's reputation, but all of NCIS. I don't mind for myself, I can live with the consequences, but you, Tony, Ziva and Abby shouldn't have to." McGee lowered his head in shame. _I should have known this would eventually come out. I thought I had left it all behind. What is it they say about things hidden in the past ..._

"Tim, look at me." Gibbs' quiet voice surprised McGee. He looked up at Gibbs as requested expecting to see disappointment and reproach on the face of his mentor, and was surprised to see compassion instead.

"Why do you think I brought you on to my team?"

McGee shrugged, "You needed someone good with computers." That earned him a soft head slap and earned Gibbs a ghost of a smile.

"You know better than that. If it was just computer skills, I could have TADed anyone from Cyber-crimes anytime I needed. Now, try again. Why do you think I brought you on to my team?" Gibbs asked with more force this time.

McGee moved his hands into his lap and intertwined his fingers. He lowered his head again, and shrugged. "You were impressed with my degrees?" Tim's voice was meek.

Gibbs sighed. "No Tim, I was impressed with _**you**_. From the first moment I met you at Norfolk, I knew I wanted you on my team. Not because of your degrees, but because of the untapped potential I could see in _**you**_." _I should have told him this a long time ago._

McGee looked back up at Gibbs in disbelief. "Really?" His eyes lit up for just a moment, and then fell again. He looked away. "It must be a huge disappointment to find out what kind of person you actually have on your team." Tim hated it when Gibbs was disappointed in him. He always looked to Gibbs as the father he always wanted. He knew Gibbs didn't feel the same, he could tell that Gibbs always kept him at arms length, unlike the rest of the team. Tim accepted that, he knew there was no way he had any right to expect different. However, he still wanted Gibbs to be proud of him and tried hard to impress the man. When he fell short, it devastated him.

"And what kind of person is that?"

"A coward, a victim, a ... worthless, just worthless." McGee breathed out the words he had heard so often and tried so hard to fight against. _I guess you really can't change who you are._

Gibbs narrowed his eyes, he had a suspicion of where these words were really coming from, so he tested it. "Is that what your father told you?"

McGee looked up to watch the fountain again. He nodded. "When I woke up in that hole, cover in maggots, it was dark out and my only thought was 'My dad is going to kill me.' He told me to be home early. He said he had something important to tell me and I knew to never disobey him."

Tim paused to gather his thoughts. "I dug steps out of the sides of the hole and worked my way up. Got dressed and made my way home. I snuck into my house. Yeah, me, snuck in. All I wanted to do was shower and get the feeling of … of Theodore off of me." His voice becoming shaky.

Gibbs just sat and listened. This was the part he needed to hear, Tim's part.

"I made it to the bathroom and started undressing, when my dad came in. He must have been waiting for me." A tear escaped and trailed down Tim's face. "Damn it!" he breathed as he hastily wiped it away and took a deep breath to gain control. "I begged him not to look at me and to just leave. I was starting to get hysterical." He paused again to fight back more tears.

"He walked up to me and knelt down and for a moment I actually thought he was going to hug me." McGee shook his head. "Stupid. He grabbed my arms and told me to get a hold of myself and keep quiet so that I didn't wake up Mom. He helped me shower, the water was so hot that it scaled me. To this day, I take cool showers, used to drive Abby nuts." McGee actually gave a small smile that quickly vanished.

"Sorry, I'm sure you don't want to hear about that. Anyway, when the shower was done and he was drying me off, he told me he couldn't believe that he end up with such a worthless son. To allow myself to become a victim like this showed just how much of a true coward I was. He just kept saying it over and over and over." This time he couldn't hold all of the tears back and wiped them away quickly.

"He looked me straight in the eyes and said 'This never happened.' ... said it would ruin his and Mom's careers if it got out ... that it was bad enough that I was going against generations of tradition ... that I couldn't go back to school again, everyone would take one look at me and know what happened." He paused and took a deep breath. "That if I ever wanted to do anything worthwhile, this 'incident' could never be found out or else everyone would know just how truly worthless I am."

McGee stopped and just started into the fountain, to afraid to look at Gibbs.

Gibbs, on the other hand, was fuming. _How could a parent say that to their hurting child! How could they only be worried about themselves! If I ever get my hands on his father ..._ Out loud, he asked questions. "Did your mother know? Did she ever get you help?"

"I don't think she knew for sure. I know Dad told her that I was being punished and that I wasn't allowed to return to school for the rest of the year. She didn't argue or ask any questions, she never did. As for help, no, I wasn't allowed to talk to anyone about it. That was actually fine with me, all I wanted was to forget."

"I thought you told DiNozzo once that you had been to a therapist?"

"That didn't happen until MIT. I had a rough time my first semester." McGee shook his head at the memory. "I guess its pretty amazing that I've gotten as far as I have, considering ..." He lowered his head again.

Gibbs looked over at his agent. Tim's fingers were still interlaced and his head was down. He was rocking and shaking slightly. Gibbs knew this was from the incredible effort on McGee's part to keep it together. On his way over to the park, Gibbs had made up his mind to fill the father figure for Tim, just like he did for the rest of his team. It was now time to let that show.

Gibbs slid off the bench and squatted down in front of Tim. "Well, you're right about that. It is amazing that you've come so far."

McGee closed his eyes. _Here it comes, I can handle this. I have to! I have it coming._ He couldn't find the strength to reopen his eyes.

"You could have turned into someone bitter or angry at the world. You could have become a criminal to get back at everyone. Instead, you chose to stick by your principles. You chose to help others, instead of hurting them. And you did it all on your own." Gibbs paused waiting for Tim to look up at him.

McGee couldn't believe what he was hearing! _This can't be real! There's a 'but' to this somewhere. There has to be!_ He slowly raised his head and met Gibbs stare.

When their eyes locked, Gibbs didn't see the eyes of a seasoned agent, but that of a little boy who was hurting and scared. Gibbs knew exactly what Tim needed to hear.

"Tim, you're an amazing person. You're stronger than any of us give you credit for and I'm even more proud of you, if that's even possible. You just need to realize that this time ..." Gibbs reach up and grabbed Tim's shoulder and gave it a shake. "... this time, you are not alone in this. We, the whole team are going to be here for you, every step of the way. We are going to protect you. **I'm **going to protect you. I will **not **let Theodore hurt you any more."

McGee was too shocked for words while what Gibbs' said sunk in. It was what he had needed to hear all those years ago. Now, to finally hear them completely dissolved the hold he had on his emotions.

The tears started slowly. Gibbs still had his hand on Tim's shoulder and pull him closer, so that Tim head was resting on his shoulder. The tears turned into crying. Tim grabbed onto Gibbs and the crying turned into sobbing. Gibbs just held him, giving Tim the support he never had.

Roger's words from earlier came back to him, _'It's good to see the kid finally get some support. Lord knows, he's never had any when we were growing up.'_ Gibbs grabbed onto Tim even stronger. _Damn Right! He's our family, and we will protect our own._

Gibbs gave a quick glare to the two standing silent watch over the scene. They both knew right away what that look meant, _'If any of this comes back to haunt my agent, I will have your heads!'_ They both nodded their understanding and Gibbs turned his attention back to his hurting agent. He held on tight while the storm ran its course.

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><p>I know that Tim is older than Ziva, but experience wise he is definitely younger.<p> 


	6. Chapter 6

Thank to everyone who has read, alerted & reviewed. I am thankful and honored.

Disclaimer - I am just letting my imagination run wild - none is mine for keeps.

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><p>CHAPTER 7<p>

Over an hour had passed since Gibbs left to find McGee and DiNozzo was getting ancy. He looked to the elevator every other minute and then checked his watch.

For Ziva, Tony was only making the waiting worse. "Tony, if you do not stop looking at the elevator every second I am going to gouge your eyes out."

Tony just huffed, "I'm worried Ziva."

That simple statement cooled Ziva's own torrent of emotions. If Tony admitted outwardly that he was worried, instead of cracking a joke, it meant that he was almost to his breaking point.

"Tony ..." Ziva didn't get to finish as the elevator opened to reveal Gibbs and McGee.

They both stood to start walking over to them, but Gibbs gave a quick glance and they paused.

DiNozzo took a good look at the two. If Tony thought he was emotionally exhausted from everything he had learned earlier, then Tim looked as though he had been run over by an airliner ... several times. He was pale, eyes unfocused and red. Gibbs was supporting him by holing onto his right elbow.

Gibbs guided McGee further into the bullpen and motioned to Tony to come over. There were no words exchanged as Gibbs handed Tim over to him, but DiNozzo knew exactly what Gibbs wanted of him. "Come on Probie, let's get you looking like a federal agent again." Tony said in his most lighthearted voice as he grabbed Tim's elbow when Gibbs let go.

They both knew that McGee needed the physical contact for now to keep him grounded.

McGee's eyes came back into focus. "I'm not the Probie any more, remember, that's Ziva." He responded trying to put some playfulness into his voice, but not succeeding.

DiNozzo gave a small smile, acknowledging the effort Tim was making. Tony continued the teasing as they made their way to the men's room. "Oh, you're wrong there McPass-The-Buck. You'll always be Probie! Ziva is Probette!"

McGee actual gave a little smile and shook his head. "You and your nicknames. Where do you come up with all of them?"

The last Gibbs heard as the two rounded the corner was DiNozzo's reply of "It's a gift McGee, just like your ..."

Gibbs gave a smile, he knew Tony could get McGee back on his feet again. The two had a tumultuous start, but were now 'as thick as thieves'. DiNozzo might have thought he kept it a well hidden secret that he thought of Tim as a little brother, but it was plain as day to anyone who looked at how the two interacted.

Roger and Airman Settie had been standing by Ziva's desk when Gibbs and McGee came back. Roger waited until the two had walked past him to move. He went over to Airman Williams to get an update. He watched as Gibbs passed off Tim to Tony and then waited until the two were out of sight to make his way over to the team leader.

Gibbs was still watching where his two agents had been. Roger stood facing his back and asked anxiously, "How is Tim, sir?"

Gibbs didn't bother to turn around to address the Staff Sergeant. "Agent McGee." He replied in a deathly tone.

"Sir?"

Gibbs turned and got into Roger's face, noses touching. The look in Gibbs' eyes turned Roger's insides to mush. If Roger didn't have military training, he would have shrunk back from the intensity in Gibbs' blue eyes. However, he stood his ground, accepting whatever Gibbs wanted to throw his away.

"You will refer to him as 'Special Agent McGee' or 'Agent McGee' for short. You will give him the respect you owe him. If I hear you address him as Tim, Timothy, Timmy or anything else, I will have you pulled from this detail. Do I make myself clear, Staff Sergeant?"

"Yes sir." Roger actually like this man. Behind the burning anger in those eyes, he could see the concern Gibbs held for his team. Roger was glad that Tim found people who could truly see him for the person he was.

Gibbs stared for a few moments. He too, was looking for more, he was looking for deception, but found instead sincerity. Gibbs didn't know if McGee was willing to accept that sincerity or not, but either way Gibbs would stand by his choice.

"David, report." Gibbs turned from Roger and looked at his agent.

Roger nodded at the dismissal and went back to standing at Ziva's desk. Roger had instructed his two subordinates to take up position by the elevators. The three settled into their positions and carried out their protection detail duties.

Ziva had been watching the exchange between Gibbs and Roger with interest. She was surprised that Roger neither backed down from Gibbs or protested his instructions. Normally that would have garnered the Israeli's respect, but she was not going to forgive this man for his part in the crimes against McGee.

When Gibbs asked for the update, Ziva went to Tim's desk instead of her own. Gibbs raised his eyebrows at this, but didn't say anything.

"Besides the evidence that Staff Sergeant Ferris presented, we have found more that connects these murders to McGee." She paused to put some information on the big screen. "Abby helped us get into McGee's elementary school records. She is not as fast as McGee is getting into sealed documents, so we did not have much time to go over the information, but what we did find makes me agree with the Air Force in regards to McGee's need for protection."

Gibbs didn't like the sound of that. "What did you find?"

Ziva put up a picture of an elderly man with kind grey eyes. "This is Marlen Cincotti, the janitor of McGee's elementary school and the one who pulled McGee from the locker."

Gibbs gave a questioning look.

"Timothy Abbott was the school janitor who was murdered and stuffed into a locker." Ziva could see the comprehension flash on Gibbs' face, then was replaced with dread. "Was he the only one with this type of connection?"

"No." Ziva put up the next picture. It was an athletic man with brown hair and eyes. "This is Walter Nast. Not only was he the swimming instructor for the school at the time when Tim attended, but also volunteered for the YMCA." Ziva's voice was calm and steady, but her eyes were burning with anger.

"Next is Dean Kole. He is the one who released McGee from the tree when ..." She paused before she could say something unbecoming. "At the time he held the rank of Webelos in the Boy Scouts. Same as McGee."

"And Captain Dugan?" Gibbs knew what all this meant. Only someone with personal knowledge of what happened to Tim in the past could have pulled off these murders with so many tie ins.

Ziva just shook her head. "I cannot seem to find anything ... yet."

"Keep looking. Also, keep looking for any other connections, even those that don't involve Tim."

Ziva nodded and went back to her searches, still at McGee's desk. Gibbs sat at his own desk and took a moment to gather his thoughts. _This is definitely a message to Tim. I will be damned if I'm going to let some psychotic monster from his past run him through the ringer like this! We need to be able to get ahead of him before he can make another move._

XXXX

DiNozzo lead McGee into the men's room, which was surprisingly empty. He bent Tim down over one of the sinks and turned the water on and then released Tim's elbow.

McGee roboticly went to splashing his face. He paused and turned off the water. He leaned his forehead against the mirror. "Tony, I'm sorry that you had to see me like this. I should have reacted better, I was just caught by surprise so much that I ..."

Tony gave Tim a head slap. "You have nothing to be sorry about! You've handled this situation better than I would." DiNozzo couldn't believe that McGee felt the need to apologize.

Tim, still resting his forehead on the mirror, turn his head to give a sideways glance to Tony. "Really? How would you have handled it?"

DiNozzo put both hands on the sink, "I would have ..."

He didn't get to continue, Tim happened to look down at Tony's hands when he placed them on the sink and saw the bruising on his right hand. "Tony! What happened?" McGee straightened and grabbed Tony's hand. He started the faucet again and put Tony's hand underneath the running cold water.

DiNozzo was shocked. _Why is Tim worrying about me?_ Tony gave a self satisfied smile. "Oh, I just gave that Roger a proper introduction to my right fist."

"Tony! Why would you do that? What's going to happen when Vance finds out? He could put it in your permanent record, or transfer you, or suspend you, or ..." McGee was gently rubbing the bruised hand under the cold water, his own hands shaking.

Tony scowled. "Because he deserved it Tim." He gently pulled his hand out of Tim's, turned off the water and used his other hand to grab McGee by the shoulder and turn Tim towards him.

McGee turned, but kept his head down. "Vance was standing right there and didn't reprimand me. Even if he would have, I would have no regrets about giving Mr. Ferris something to remember me by."

McGee sighed. "Tony, I'm not worth ..."

"Stop right there!" Tony replied angrily. "Yes, you are! Tim look at me."

McGee shook his head. He was too full of shame to look at his partner.

DiNozzo huffed. "Fine, but you will listen to me." McGee nodded weakly. "Not only are you a member of my team, you are my partner and my friend. I will not stand by while someone hurts you. Not now, not ever. I don't care what the consequences are, I **will **always have your six, ALWAYS. Do you understand me?" Tony gave Tim's shoulder a squeeze and a shake.

McGee looked up at DiNozzo with disbelief. Gibbs said that the entire team was willing to stand by him, not that he didn't believe Gibbs, but he thought it was more out of obligation. Hearing Tony voice out loud, with no joking, what he really felt meant more to McGee than he could ever express.

"Thanks Tony."

"It's nothing you have to thank me for. It's just something you should expect." Tony though he knew why McGee felt the way he did, so he decided to test it in true DiNozzo style. "Don't look so surprised, give me some credit, will ya."

McGee was appalled that he had insulted his partner "Tony, I'm so sorry! It's just that ..."

"You've never had the support before."

McGee dropped his head again. "Yeah." He breathed out.

DiNozzo smiled. He would never admit to it out loud, but Tim was like the little brother he had always wanted. Someone he could tease, but who would always be there when needed.

He had a difficult time accepting Tim at first. Not only was he taking all of Gibbs attention, but he was so different from any of the other cops or agents Tony had worked with before. This turned out to be a good thing. Tim was the most honest, upstanding and loyal person Tony had ever met.

Watching McGee grow from a timid, stuttering, naïve rookie into a confident and strong field agent made Tony very proud to have been part of that development. He knew he was a better person for having known and worked with one Timothy McGee, and with that, came a fierce bond. DiNozzo knew he would stand by McGee through anything, right or wrong. _Not that Tim would ever be on the wrong side of anything._

That thought made DiNozzo smile even more. _Enough of the serious stuff!_ Tony took the hand resting on McGee's shoulder and slid it behind his neck to reach over to the other shoulder. "Come on McWorrier! You ready to get back to work?" Tony gave Tim a firm shake.

McGee gave a small smile, that somehow even showed in his eyes. "Sure Tony. I'm sure you're lost with out me."

DiNozzo once again guided McGee, this time heading back out of the bathroom. 'I'll have you know that I've been going through all those computer records just fine on my own." Tony's smile widen as Tim's playfulness made a small return.

"And I'm sure Abby helped the entire time."

DiNozzo released McGee as they walked back to the bullpen. In his worst Rodney Dangerfield imitation, he remarked, "I get no respect, I tell ya, no respect." Garnering a small laugh from Tim.

Oh yeah, the team was back in the saddle again.


	7. Chapter 7

Again, thank you to all who have read & reviewed.

Usual disclaimer: I only own the character's I've created for this story.

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><p>Gibbs studied his two agents when they came back. DiNozzo was wearing a smile as he walked side by side with McGee. Tim still looked pale, but his face and eyes were less haunted. Gibbs allowed himself a small smile. He knew Tony could pull McGee out of the mindset he was starting to get mired in, and back to normal … well, at least normal for Team Gibbs.<p>

McGee walked up to his desk and was unfazed to see Ziva sitting there. He figured that she had started the searches on his computer so that he could easily take over. He gave her an attempt of a smile. "Hey Ziva, what have you found?"

Ziva looked at McGee closely. She had other reasons for wanting to be at his desk. She could see the storm raging behind those clear green eyes, it was the same look she had seen for many months after being rescued from Somalia. She knew, better than anyone, what McGee was going to be going through now that all of this had been stirred up. She wanted to be close to offer her support and advise.

"It is not good McGee." She said as she slid out of his chair, but retreated only to perch on the shelving behind his chair. "There are some deeper connections than we first realized."

"Yeah, I know. Everyone that has been murder has a similarity to the people who helped me out in elementary school."

Everyone stared at him in shock. "When did you know?" Ziva asked.

McGee gave a small shrug. "Pretty much right away. I guess I was too wrapped up in myself. Sorry that I didn't say anything sooner, I could have saved you a lot of time." He was already typing parameters for a new search and didn't noticed the exchanged looks from his team.

"McGee! What have I told you about apologizes?" Gibbs gave in his most authoritative voice.

"Sorry, oh um ... Right Boss." Tim said as his cheeks gained little blush as he continued his set up. "Roger, have you been able to track down your old gang?" He didn't look up at Roger when he spoke.

Roger was uncomfortable about it being call 'his' gang, but didn't remark. "Theodore is in prison, maximum security in Raleigh." Roger then blushed a little. "I couldn't remember the rest of them, Agent McGee."

_Agent McGee?_ Tim smiled. "I thought as much." He continued typing.

Roger had noticed the smile and smiled, ever so slightly, to himself. He looked over to Gibbs, who was also watching his agent. He too was smiling. _These people are exactly who Tim has always needed. It's just a shame that it had to take so long. Tim has always deserved so much better._ Tim started speaking and interrupted Roger's thoughts.

"There was Mark Sieble." McGee hit a few more keys and a picture came up on the big screen. It was an elementary picture, since Abby had already hacked into that system. Mark had a pudgy face with deep set brown eyes and unruly brown hair.

"Next is Gregory Stokar." The next picture came up, showing a very average looking boy with black hair and blue eyes.

"But my money is on Nathaniel Enedy." The next picture could have been the poster child for bullying. Angry face, blazing red hair, freckled covered face and unnerving amber eyes, giving him the look of a caged wolf.

Roger walked over the screen. "Wow, how could I have forgotten about him?" He took a moment to go through his memories. "Nate idolized Theodore, would do anything he said. He became Theodore's lieutenant."

"Who in the world would have ever looked up to that ... boy?" Ziva asked in frustration.

Roger and Tim shook their heads, but McGee responded. "I heard Nate had a really bad family, not that I really talked to anyone, but even I heard the rumors."

"Yeah, his dad was a tyrant. Physically abusive. I spent the night once, only once." Roger shivered at the memory.

Gibbs was upset. _Why did seem that military men were so terrible to their kids?_ He remembered his little girl. _Would I have been different if I had boy instead?_ Gibbs shook his head. No, children were precious, boy or girl. He couldn't wrap his head around treating any child the way these had been.

McGee looked at Roger while he was looking at the pictures of his past. "Roger, I have some questions."

Roger nodded and turned away from the screen. "What do you need, Agent McGee?"

"Um, just to be thorough, can you ... is there anyone ... can you account for your whereabouts?"

"Yes sir. It is all in the file that was given to your director."

"You won't mind if we verify that information." DiNozzo said, his voice laced with suspicion.

Roger turned to look at him. "No sir. I will be completely cooperative."

Tony huffed, he had his doubts about how 'helpful' Staff Sergeant Roger Ferris was really going to be.

McGee asked his next question. "Roger, you said something about thinking this might have started before Timothy Abbott. What did you mean?"

"Would you pull up the autopsy photos of Mr. Abbott?" Roger had an uneasy feeling about this, but he couldn't put his finger on why.

McGee did so and looked at the pictures with steady eyes. Now that he was focusing on working the case, he could put away his emotions and think objectively.

"Would you focus on the pictures of his back?"

McGee brought up the requested pictures and enlarged them. Roger pointed to several slash marks along the lower back of the victim. "As you can see there are five slash marks on his back. Two on the right and three on the left, with one slash going the opposite direction of the other two."

Gibbs and DiNozzo walked over to the plasma as well. "Why would he start with the letter 'A' but mark this as the fifth victim? It makes no sense." DiNozzo said as he shook his head.

"I agree. Also, all of the victims have the same markings. You would think it would go up, five, six, seven … but it's the same five marks every time."

"Those aren't counting marks. Well, they are, but not how you're thinking." McGee paused to look at Roger. "Did you really forget?"

The light came on in Roger's eyes. Now he knew where that feeling of dread was coming from when he looked at these markings. He breathed out, "Accomplishment marks."

McGee nodded at him, "Yeah." His voice was turning back into sounding far away. That objective control was giving way to emotions again.

Gibbs looked at Tim. "Accomplishment marks? What do you mean?"

McGee closed his eyes. _Might as well show them._ He stood, turned his back to them, and hunched over a little. He lifted his shirt tails and pull the waist of his pants down just a little. On the right side of his back were two scars in straight lines, on the left there were three, but one was slanted differently. The marks were an exact match to the marks on all of the victims.

Ziva couldn't help herself. She reached out and, with her index finger, lightly traced the odd slanted scar. "McGee what is this?" She breathed out.

"Every time Theodore would successfully pull off one of his 'master plans', he would place an accomplishment mark." McGee was starting to feel overly exposed, so he straightened and covered the scars again.

His team was appalled. Ziva spoke first. "Why is the one different."

"That one, Nate gave me."

Gibbs opened his mouth to say something, but Roger's reminiscing stopped him. "I remember that now. Theodore almost killed him for doing that."

"What?" DiNozzo was confused.

McGee picked up the narration. "Nate had destroyed one of my reports before school that day. The teacher, Mrs. Moorer, said in front of the whole class how disappointed she was that her best student couldn't turn his assignments in on time. I was so embarrassed, but I knew better than to say thing. I just stood there. After school, I was trying to make my way home as quickly as I could, but Nate was waiting for me. He was alone, which was odd. You guys never went anywhere without the others."

Roger nodded. "Yeah, Theodore was already furious that Nate had destroyed your report, he didn't approve. I think Theodore was actually looking forward to hearing it."

Tim's team stared at him in shock. "Remember, completely obsessed. Any way, when Theodore couldn't find Nate at our usual meeting spot, he went looking for him. When we found him, he was still on top of Tim, he had just finished 'marking' him. He looked at Theodore with such a satisfied look. Theodore, on the other hand ..." Roger took a moment to shudder. "... it was the first time that I saw true uncontrolled rage. He walked up to Nate and punched him in the chest so hard that he flew off of Tim and landed several feet away. He ordered us to take Nate and wait for him at the playground."

Gibbs glared at Roger using Tim's first name, but let it pass. Since he was talking about Tim in the past, it would be odd to refer to him as 'Agent McGee'. However, Gibbs wouldn't let him get away with it again. He was just about to remind Roger of their arrangement when McGee continued the narration.

"Theodore helped me up off the ground." Everyone could tell that McGee was completely lost in his memories by the tone of his voice. "He dusted me off, put his arm around me and started walking. He started talking about that day's assignments and what he thought of having to play dodge ball for gym. Just like we were best friends sharing the day. I was still hurting from what Nate had done and was so completely in shock about what Theodore was doing, that I just walked with him."

"When we reached his house, he took me to his bedroom and actually patched me up. You know, he could have been a doctor, he had a really gentle touch. He just kept talking about regular stuff, stuff that any kids our age would talk about. When he was done, he stood in front of me and lifted his shirt to show me the 'accomplishment' marks he had given himself. His were on the front, while mine were on the back. He explained that every time I came back and aced a test or completed a report or gave a presentation the day after something he had done to me, he would give himself a mark because it was my accomplishment over him. Easier to cut yourself on the front, that's why mine are always on my back." Tim was starting to shake.

"Then he got a knife out of his dresser. I was so scared of what he was going to do to me, but he placed the knife in my hand and told me to make the next mark on him. I was reeling. As much as wanted to get back at him for everything he had done up to that point, I didn't want to cut into him. I refused and threw the knife onto the bed. Theodore gabbed it ... placed it back into my hand ... wrapped his hands around mine and made me ... I didn't want to, but he made me ... it was slanted, unlike the other marks ... it had to match mine ... said that we are mirror images of each other ... we always were going to be the same but different ... always."

Everyone stared in silence, unsure what to say about this new information.

A silent tear slipped down Tim's face. Ziva reached out and placed her hand on his arm. McGee looked down at her and saw silent understanding. They locked eyes for a moment. Ziva giving support and Tim soaking it up. He then wiped the tear away and nodded. "Right, back to work."

McGee silently sat down and began going through the information his searches had come up with. Ziva took up her vigil on his shelf. Gibbs and DiNozzo stood for a moment more, working on getting their emotions under control, then went back to their respective desks.

Roger also returned to his position at Ziva's desk. He had always wondered what had happened to Tim that day. Roger was willing to tell them what had happened to Nate, but he could tell by the mood of the room, they weren't interested. He let himself remember events long buried.


	8. Chapter 8

I am so thankful to all who have written & reviewed! Just remember ... our journey is just beginning!

Disclaimer: You know the drill, not mine, just borrowing

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><p>An hour later Gibbs was still taking quick glances towards McGee. He couldn't believe Tim had lived through something so horrific and ended up the kind and gentle person he was. Gibbs thought back to a case, when a bullying victim teamed up with a greedy auctioneer to get revenge on those who had hurt him. He hadn't really even thought of McGee while that case was going on. He only remember about Tim's past when he had made the comment of, "Oh, I bet that felt good.", when they found out Officer Shelley had given Sergeant Ross three traffic tickets instead of just one.<p>

McGee made his bullying such a non-issue, it was easy to forget that he was ever bullied in the fist place. McGee didn't have one ounce of revenge following through him. What Gibbs had said in the park was true, Tim was truly an amazing person.

But, what Gibbs really couldn't figure out at this moment was what Ziva was doing hovering behind McGee. She was sitting on his shelving and watching over his shoulder while he worked. She should have been tracking down her own leads, at her own desk, not just watching. Several times Gibbs had started to order Ziva back to her desk, but the look on her face stopped Gibbs. He just couldn't put his finger on what was stopping him.

The next glance turned into watching as McGee's hands were starting to shake ever so slightly. Gibbs thought this might happen. Having to go through the records of his past tormentors was wearing on him. As Gibbs, watched, the shaking grew more and more pronounced.

Gibbs started to get up, but paused as he watched Ziva lean forward, placing her hand on McGee's shoulder and lean in so close, that her mouth was touching his ear. She whispered something to him, the only reason Gibbs knew she said anything was because he could see her mouth moving.

McGee closed his eyes and clenched his hands into fists to stop the shaking. He seemed to be listening to whatever Ziva was saying to him. He nodded, reopened his eyes, unclenched his fists and started working again, the shaking was gone. Ziva gave a small smile and sat back, then glared over to Roger.

Now, Gibbs realized what Ziva was doing. McGee hadn't had time to come to grips with this situation. It makes sense that it would hit him in waves of emotions, that could be overwhelming. Which is why Ziva needed to be close, to stop the wave before it could drown him. Gibbs smiled in fierce pride of his team.

The smile slowly faded, as he realized something else. Tim and Ziva now shared something terrible in common, they were both torture victims. Even worse, both were rape victims. Ziva had never gone into detail about what had happened to her in Somalia, but any moron would have realized that would have been one of the 'techniques' used. Ziva had received professional help, Tim had not. Ziva was going to be the best person to get Tim through this, and she knew it.

Gibbs was getting angry again, he needed something to do so that he could focus his anger into something constructive. Lucky, his phone rang.

~ "Jethro, would you mind coming down here." ~

It was rare that Ducky had to call him to share information, Gibbs usually just showed up when required. He knew what this meant, he was reluctant to be separated from Tim for any length of time. However, he knew Tim was in good hands.

"Be right down, Duck."

XXXX

Gibbs walked into autopsy finding Ducky and Abby sitting off to the side. Ducky was holding her hands. They both turned at Gibbs entrance.

Abby got up and flew into Gibbs' arms. Gibbs returned the hug, but was a little upset. Sure, all of this was hard for the team to go through, but it was hardest on McGee, that's where his focus should be. Gibbs looked at Ducky, "Is this why you called me?" He tried to sound un-annoyed, but not really succeeding.

Ducky let out a sigh, "No, Jethro. I called you …"

"How is he Gibbs?"

Gibbs looked down at the forensic scientist and let a little of his annoyance fade. "The best he can be right now. Although, I have to give him credit, he's up there working." Gibbs kissed the top of her head and gave a small smile.

Abby gave a thin smile back. "That's McGee for you." she said through forced enthusiasm. Her face was still bleak and eyes clouded with a myriad of emotions.

"Jethro, is that really a good idea?" Ducky's eyes brows knitted together in concern.

"His idea, Duck." Dr. Mallard started to voice more objections, but Gibbs stopped him. "I think it gives him a way to have some control over this situation. Lord knows he's had none in the past."

Ducky paused and reigned in his objections. "I can very well understand the need to feel empowered, however, I'm worried about the mental and emotional toll this will take on our young Timothy."

Gibbs smile deepened a little. "He's not so young any more Duck."

Ducky smile back and shook his head, "Ah, yes, well, he will always be young to me." Playfulness shone in his voice and gave a twinkle to his eyes.

Abby wasn't ready for the lightheartedness. She looked first at Gibbs, then at Ducky and back. "How can you guys be joking? None of this is funny! I mean Tim needs our support, not making him the butt of our jokes!"

Gibbs bristled at her words. He pulled her out of his embrace and looked her square in the eyes. "You should know better! Even Tim has started joking again. It's not to forget the seriousness, it's to not let it take over. As for support, he is going to have more support than he ever did. Do I make myself clear?"

Abby nodded and chewed on her lip. She did know better, but the words just came out in all of her worry. All she wanted was to wrap her arms around Tim and not let anything or anyone else hurt him and she couldn't do that right now. She had work to do, and hadn't been able to see Tim since he ran out of the conference room. However, something niggled at the back of her mind at what Gibbs said.

"So you mean it's true about Tim's dad? I had hoped that Roger guy was lying or exaggerating."

Gibbs let go of Abby. He rubbed his forehead while responding. "No, Abby he wasn't. I … why would any parent tell their kid 'This didn't happen.' If he were my son, I would have torn that base apart …" Gibbs stopped as the emotions threatened to get away from him.

Abby and Ducky exchanged confused looks. Abby was the one who asked the shared question, "You mean his dad knew about … what happened?"

Gibbs looked at the two of them. He knew he had wanted to talk to Ducky about what McGee had told him in the park, but he wasn't so sure about letting Abby know. Tim never said it was a private conversation, but then again, he didn't say it wasn't. Gibbs mulled it over for a moment and made his decision.

"All right, but this doesn't go past the four of us. I haven't even had a chance to fill in Tony or Ziva yet and I don't want Tim to have to explain it again."

They both nodded, but Ducky had a question, "The four of us?"

Gibbs gave a lopsided quirk to his mouth. "Yeah, the four of us. Right Palmer."

Jimmy Palmer, Ducky intern and assistant, came out of the corner he had been standing. He blushed at being caught. "I would like to help, too. Even if it's just picking up Dr. Mallard's slack … I mean not to say that he would ever slack off, but this case seems like it's going to take all of his time and he might not be able to focus … wait, not that he can't focus on more than one case at a time …" Jimmy let out a huff, he could never seem to say what he meant without insulting someone. "I just want to help."

Gibbs, Abby and Ducky all smiled at Jimmy's efforts. Ducky walked up to his assistant and put a hand on his shoulder. "I'm sure Timothy will appreciate your help Mr. Palmer."

"You really think so?" Jimmy asked with a slight smile of his own.

Ducky nodded. "The more support the better, I'd say."

The smile left Gibbs as he remembered the conversation in the park. "Yeah, I think Tim is going to need an army of support and knowing how stubborn he can be, we might just have to shove our support down his throat."

Now Abby was curious. "What do you mean Gibbs?"

Gibbs took a breath and then started recounting the conversation he and McGee had in the park. He left nothing out. His audience of three listen in shock.

"… when he started crying, it was like a damn had opened up. But it wasn't the crying of a grown man, it was like that of a broken little boy. I just let him hold on to me until he was ready to stop." Gibbs shook his head. "When he did, he had this dead look in his eyes. I thought he would feel better, but it was like he had cried himself out so completely that there was nothing left." Again, Gibbs shook his head.

"How did you get him to come back and get him working again?" Abby asked very quietly.

"When he took a moment to dry his eyes, I asked if he was ready to go back NCIS." Gibbs paused as pride grew in his voice. "Tim looked me right in the eyes and said 'Yes, Boss. We have people to protect.'"

Ducky smiled. "We have a truly amazing person in our midst."

"That we do Duck, that we do."

"So now what?" Abby asked.

"Now, we find the son-of-a-bitch doing this and lock him away for so long that he will never see the light of day again." Gibbs practically growled with determination. He started to turn to get back to his agent when he remember something. "Duck, you said you called me down here for a reason?"

Ducky jumped, so completely lost in his thoughts. "Yes, right! I was going over the autopsy reports and photos. There seem to be some strange markings on the back of all the victims. They were made post-mortem. I think they signify …"

"I know what they signify." Gibbs interrupted his friend. The anger returning.

"Oh, really." Ducky raised his eyebrows in anticipation.

Gibbs sighed, repeating all of this was so hard, how in the world did Tim manage and keep his head about him. He rubbed his temple again, then repeated the story of the 'Accomplishment Marks', again leaving nothing out.

"Oh, my. Timothy has certainly been through more than his share of torment." Ducky sighed as he shook his head.

Palmer had been silent through both stories, he now spoke up. "I knew we both had been bullied in school. I tried to talk to him about it once. It was the day after Abby and I had accidentally glued ourselves together. Agent McGee was actually apologizing for the way he acted." Jimmy took a moment for a small laugh. "When I brought it up, he said that it was behind both of us now and that we shouldn't let it interfere in our present." Jimmy now shook his head at himself. "I thought, there was no way his bullying could be that bad if he could let it go like that." He looked to Gibbs, for the first time unafraid. "Guess I was wrong."

Gibbs could see the self reproach in Jimmy's eyes. "We all were Palmer." Jimmy gave a slight nod.

Gibbs looked at his ME. "Anything else?"

"Well, the use of the knife to deliver the killing blow suggests that our killer likes close contact. Also, the killing blows suggest a moment of rage as they are ragged and haphazard."

"Do you mean he wasn't planning on killing them?" Gibbs asked, confused.

"I cannot be sure. If this is someone trying to recreate a feeling or a moment, it could be that he realizes it is not the same and kills his victims because of it."

"You mean he kills them because they're not Timmy?" Abby asked shocked. She didn't think anything about this case could shock her anymore.

Ducky nodded. "It is a possibility. The victims are substitutes and when the killer can't get the same feeling, he kills the substitute … or because he realizes that he has settle for less than the original."

"Ducky, don't let McGee know that. Same with you two." He looked to Abby and Palmer. "That theory stays here, between us."

"I agree, Jethro, this is all just speculation, and with Timothy's habit of carrying guilt for things he is not responsible, this can only hurt him."

Gibbs nodded. "Abby, make sure anything you find, goes thru me first."

She nodded, but frowned. "Are you keeping him out of the loop?"

Gibbs shook his head. "No. I just want to filter the information he receives."

Abby started to object, but Gibbs gently grabbed her arms and talked over her. "Listen to me. He is keeping it together by a thread right now. I'm not willing to let anything break that thread." He locked his blue eyes with her green ones. "When that tread grows into a rope, then I'll give him more."

Abby gave a shaky smile. "When?"

Gibbs smiled back. "Oh yeah, I have no doubt Tim will find his footing, but until then …"

"… until then, we will be like his training wheels." Abby stated.

Gibbs smile grew. "Yeah, something like that." He released Abby's arms. "You ready to go back to work?"

"You bet, Bossman!" Abby's eye's glowed with intensity.

Gibbs looked at Ducky and Palmer, nodded and then lead Abby back to the elevator.


	9. Chapter 9

I didn't have a chance to personally respond to the reviews I have recently gotten - I offer my apologizes. Thank you to all of you. I am so appreciative of you who are reading and those who are reviewing.

Anyway - on with the story. Disclaimer: I own none of NCIS, but wishing ...

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><p>Abby went all the way to the bullpen with Gibbs. She had to see Tim for herself.<p>

The elevator ride was quiet the entire way.

When they stepped out, Gibbs went straight to his desk. Abby took a moment to look around. She saw the airmen at the doors of the outside elevator and the Staff Sergeant standing as Ziva's desk, keeping a discrete eye on McGee.

DiNozzo was watching McGee as well, but he had a look on his face that Abby had rarely seen before. It took her a few moments to realize that it wasn't just annoyance, it was jealousy. _Jealous of what?_

Abby smiled and then followed Tony's gaze. She saw McGee hard at work, as always, and then had to take a double take. Ziva was leaning forward with her hand on his shoulder and a small smile played on her lips. Abby looked again at Tim, he seemed oblivious to Ziva even being there.

She figured Ziva stepped in where Tony wanted to be. She smiled more. _Tim is going to have all of us fighting over him! But, I have the advantage! I know him the best!_

She walked over to his desk. "Hey, McGee! How's it going?" She said in her most 'normal' Abby voice.

Ziva sat back and took her hand off of his shoulder. McGee looked up and smiled, however it didn't reach his eyes, "Hey Abby. Lots to go through. You?"

Abby's smile waiver for a moment as she saw the storm in his eyes. "Same here. Let me know if you need any help."

"Sure Abs." McGee was trying so hard just to be himself, but Abby could see that he felt uncomfortable in his own skin.

Abby fought hard to keep the smile on her face, right now she was the one who needed physical contact. "Tim …?"

He knew exactly what she wanted, so he stood, held out his arms and braced himself. Abby seemed to come through the desk in her rush to get into his embrace.

"Don't worry Abby, it's all going to be ok."

"You promise?" She squeezed and closed her eyes. If she had looked around the bullpen, she would have seen four displeased faces. Gibbs, Tony, Ziva, and Roger wanted everything to focus on Tim's needs.

McGee however, was grateful to have the attention off of him for a moment. Full filling someone else's needs was so much easier than dealing with his own. Also, he was not used to all the attention, he had gotten comfortable being the 'behind-the-scenes' support. He knew he was important to his team, but there were a lot of times that he faded into the background, it was where he fit. Now, not only did he have his past coming back to bite him in the ass, but he was out of his comfort zone.

He kissed the top of Abby's head. "I promise."

Abby was enjoying feeling of her friend's hug and hugged back harder. It was definitely better than the stiff hug he had given in Vance's office, but it still wasn't still a true Timothy McGee hug.

McGee enjoyed the hug for a moment, but started to get uncomfortable. Not only was everyone watching, but Abby was holding on a little too tight, and it was bringing back memories of being held down … of being marked … of being assaulted. He closed his eyes and chastised himself. _This is Abby for heavens sake! Not … Why do I feel like this! Get it together, Tim!_

Ziva was watching McGee closely. She knew that he would always put everyone's needs ahead of his own, especially Abby's. When he stood to hug Abby, Ziva shifted so that she could watch his face. When he closed his eyes, she saw the anguish. She took a moment to school her emotions before opening her mouth. "Abby, there is much that we all have to go through, yes?"

Abby nodded against McGee's chest and pulled back. He opened his eyes and plastered a fake smile on his face before she could take a good look at him, but as always, his eyes gave him away.

"Timmy?"

"Ziva's right, we all have a lot of work to do." He took a step back from Abby, but kept the fake smile up so as not to offend her.

She wasn't fooled, took a step towards him and reached out. It was the wrong thing to do. He took another step back, trying very hard to keep smiling.

Gibbs and DiNozzo saw what was happening. Tony's desk was closer, he got up and walked up behind Abby. He very gently put his arm around Abby's waist. "Hey Abby, I think I found something and I need your help with it."

Abby looked up at Tony. "But …' she looked back to McGee.

"I'm sure McGoo is going to have us buried under enough information from his searches soon enough. Come on, I want the chance to show him what can be done with good old fashioned detective work." Tony winked at both Tim and Abby.

McGee's smile didn't change, but his eyes soften a little. He nodded to both of them.

"Oh, okay. Sure, Tony." Abby said, her voice was full of confusion.

DiNozzo pulled on Abby's waist and she reluctantly went with him. He turned her to face way from McGee, but Abby looked over her shoulder at him. Ziva had placed a hand on his upper arm and was softly pushing him back into his chair. Her hand drifted up to his shoulder where it rested.

McGee had a far away look to him, but Ziva once again, whispered something to him that only he could hear. He closed his eyes as Ziva spoke. When she was done, he looked up at her with appreciation. Ziva just smiled and gestured towards his computer. He nodded and got back to work.

Abby turned back to Tony and started to say something. He put his finger to her lips and mouthed the word 'wait'. Neither one said anything while they waited for the elevator.

Gibbs and Ziva watched the elevator door close behind Tony and Abby. They then looked at each other. Gibbs nodded in understanding and went back to his own work. Ziva went back to her spot on Tim's shelving.

Roger had watched everything in amazement. The non-vocal communication was flawless and everyone was tuned into what Tim needed. Well, almost everyone, but no one was going to let Tim falter. Roger, once again, hid a smile to himself.

XXX

As soon as the door closed behind Tony and Abby, she rounded on him. "What the hell was that all about!"

Tony sighed, "Abby …" He reached over and flipped the emergency stop switch.

"I mean Timmy's always loves my hugs! Why would he get freaked out now!"

"Abby …" His voice was louder.

"And Ziva! Thinking she knows what Timmy needs better than I do! Nobody knows Timmy better than me!" She now understood why Tony had been wearing a jealous expression earlier.

"ABBY!"

She paused in her ranting, breathing heavy. "It's not fair Tony! He needs …"

"He needs Ziva. As much as I hate to admit it, she is the only one who can be close to Tim right now." Tony crossed his arms in front of him.

"Why … why her?"

"Because they're the same."

"What?" Now she was really confused. Ziva and Tim were very opposite sides of any spectrum. She shook her head. "No way Tony, they're as different as night and day, as …"

"They've both been through torture … and rape." Tony practically gagged on the word. "Ziva is the only one of us who knows what Tim is going through and what he is going to need to help deal with it."

She looked blankly at him. "When …"

DiNozzo shook his head. "Come on Abby, your no dummy." She still stared blankly. "Somalia."

Her face fell. "Oh." She took a moment to think. "Did she ever tell you?"

He looked right into Abby's eyes. "She didn't have to. It was in all of the thing she left unsaid and the way she carried herself when she got back." He reached out and placed his hands on Abby's shoulders. "As much as I want to be the one that Tim leans on, I'll never be able to completely understand like Ziva can. We have to put what we want aside and put what Tim needs to the fore front."

"Of course! That's what I was doing! He needed a hug!"

"No Abby, you needed the hug. You know Tim will never say no to what you want."

Abby pushed his hands off of her. "How can you be so mean!"

Tony stepped closer, a very serious expression on his face. "I know this is hard Abby, but if you can't separate your needs from his, I'll get you pulled from this case."

"WHAT!"

He took another step forward. "I'm serious Abs. I don't care if you're Gibbs favorite. This time, it's all about McGee. If you can't handle what his needs may or may not be, then you're no good for his case."

Abby studied Tony's face. He wasn't talking to her as a Special Agent, he was talking to her in full 'big brother' mode. This cooled Abby's torrent of emotions. She knew how much Tim meant to everyone on the team. She liked to think of Tim as hers, since they had been 'involved' once and still shared a special friendship, but he had become important to them all.

She huffed, knowing Tony was right. She had hugged McGee for her, not him and didn't even notice his discomfort. "I'm sorry. It's just that I've always been able to lean on him. Not being able to this time because he's the one in need is … strange. Will you help keep me in line?"

DiNozzo's face soften, but his eyes stayed intense. "You know I will."

Abby swatted his arm. "Be nice Tony." She smiled brightly to him. "This is new for me. Believe it or not, Tim is not usually very needy."

Tony's eyes finally soften to match his face. "For all of us Abs. Somehow Tim has become the strong silent type." Tony shook his head. "Who would have figured that stuttering, terrified, green as John Deere, agent would have turned into the pillar of the team."

Abby switched the elevator back on and shook her head. "Gibbs is the pillar."

"No, Abs. Gibbs is our foundation, but Tim keeps all of us going when things get tough. When Kate and Jenny died, when Gibbs left, when Ziva did, Tim was there to keep the rest of us going."

Abby took a moment to think about it. "He's always there to offer support professionally, personally, emotionally, anything we need. I think it's time to return the favor."

DiNozzo smiled, reached over and kissed the side of Abby's head. "Me too."

The elevator doors opened, Abby gave him a quick hug, smiled at him and went back to her lab.

The smile faded from his face as the doors closed. "Me too."

XXXX

Tony thought about his own words on his ride back to the bullpen. After their little talk in the men's room, he thought that McGee was going to be leaning on him for support. Also, he wanted to show Tim that he was nothing like the guys who had tortured him all those years ago. He wanted his chance to show the 'big brother' side he always felt, but rarely showed.

He had been watching Tim, too, when his hands started shaking. Tony had started to get up to help, but had to admit, he didn't know what he was going to say.

Ziva was right there, all she had to do was lean over! Whatever she said to McGee really did the trick. While Gibbs was down with Ducky, he had started to shake a couple of more times. All Ziva had to do was place her hand on his shoulder and the shaking would stop.

It was aggravating … but it was what Tim needed. By telling Abby, Tony re-enforced his own words to himself. This was all about McGee this time, all other needs and wants had to be pushed to the side, both Abby's and his own.

_We can fight over Tim later._ DiNozzo smiled at his own thought and was ready with his usual smirk when the elevator doors opened.


	10. Chapter 10

Gibbs watch Tony come out the elevator looking very pleased with himself. He knew it meant that DiNozzo had a 'talk' with Abby and the outcome was good. _Looks like Tony is finally living up to his part of the 'big brother' role_, Gibbs thought with a smirk.

Time to get things back to normal. "'Bout time DiNozzo. Did your lead pan out?" Gibbs asked with his most normal annoyed voice.

Tony picked up right away on what Gibbs was doing. "Abby's still working on it." He smiled and winked to Gibbs where McGee wouldn't see.

"Next time, make sure you have something more solid before you go off taking up time."

"Yes, Boss."

"While you were fooling around, McGee was actually getting some work done." Ziva said from behind Tim, in her usual 'fed-up with Tony' voice. She took a moment to smile at McGee before she moved in front of the plasma, with the controller. While Gibbs and DiNozzo came to stand beside her.

McGee smiled at the usual banter, it really helped to know that not everything was spinning out of control. He hit a few more key strokes to send his information. He didn't have the strength to stand and give his report, but no one was going to push him. Ziva also knew everything he did, so she could fill in any gaps if he had any trouble.

McGee took a breath and then started. "We have eliminated one suspect, Greg Stokar." An image appeared of the adult version of the black haired, blue eyed kid, a military picture. "He followed in his dad's footsteps and became Navy. He died in action two years ago."

Roger was watching from his position by Ziva's desk. He wanted to step closer, but he thought better of it this time. He wanted this to be just like any other sit-rep, just like any other case. Although, it was strange hearing about his old classmates. He shook his head slightly to himself. _How quickly it all goes, how much time did we all waste by being jerks. If we had been Tim's friends instead … Well, who knows._

McGee's voice brought Roger out of his thoughts. "Next is Mark Sieble, also followed in his father's footsteps and went into the Marines. Was honorably discharged one year ago. The strange thing is that he has fallen off the grid since then. No cards, no cell phone, no rent, nothing. The Corp is still issuing checks, but none are getting cashed."

Ziva had clicked the controller to bring up the image of a very handsome young man with brown hair and eyes. He had lost his pudge and his deep set eyes added to his attractiveness. "This can mean two things. One, that he has died without anyone noticing. Or two, …"

"… he has gone hunting for Timothys." DiNozzo added.

Gibbs gave his customary head slap. "Sorry Boss."

McGee's smiled deepened, until he brought up the information on the last member of the old gang. "Last is Nathaniel Enedy." Instead of a military picture, a prison photo was brought up. "Nate was in and out of juvy until he graduated high school and into regular jails. His crimes kept increasing, until five years ago, then he too fell off the grid."

"So we have two suspects, but no way to track either." Gibbs' annoyance was for real this time.

"I think it's most likely Siebel. He's only been missing for a year. The time frame is better for planning this stuff." DiNozzo mused.

McGee shook his head. "I know its Nate."

Tony looked at him. "How?"

"I don't know … gut feeling." Tim shrugged.

Gibbs smiled at his team. "Ziva, you've been through all of the information, what do you think?"

"I do not know. Both have plenty of opportunity, but motive is missing." Ziva gave a huff. "McGrory has the best motive, but an iron clad alibi."

"Yeah, a little something called maximum security." DiNozzo scoffed.

McGee brought himself back into focus. "Well, lets work on what we've got … or what we don't." His team looked at him. "We don't have a solid motive. Mark was kind of like a foot soldier of the gang. Like Roger, he just participated when Theodore took over. Never taking any initiative." McGee looked over to Roger, "No offense."

"None taken, sir. The truth is the truth."

"Okay, DiNozzo, you work on Siebel. David and McGee, you work on Enedy." Gibbs ordered. He wasn't sure about letting Tim dig deeper into the one other person in the group who had hurt him so badly. However, with Ziva by his side, McGee would be able to handle it. _Not just Ziva, but the rest of us as well._

He received a course of "Yes Boss!", and his team scattered to get back to work. Gibbs didn't know how much was going to be found about two people who are off the grid, but if there was anything to find, his team would.

XXXX

As the day drew to a close, McGee's shaking had increased to almost constant. Ziva ended up having to stop making phone calls to give support. She had her arms wrapped around his shoulders and rested her head on his left shoulder.

"Ziva, I'm really sorry about this. I don't know what's wrong with me."

"Hush McGee. It is not fun to watch Tony do all the thigh work by himself." Ziva said in a very playful tone.

McGee was sure her mistake was on purpose, but it still worked to bring a smile to his face. "Leg work, Ziva."

"It is all from the same body part, no?"

Tim smiled even more, but the shaking wouldn't stop.

Gibbs and DiNozzo exchanged a look and then glanced over to Roger. Gibbs had a feeling he knew what was wrong. McGee knew that at the end of the day, he was going to be whisked away to some strange safe house with a person he definitely did NOT feel safe with.

_Not if I have anything to say about it._ Gibbs was reaching for his phone, when it rang. "Gibbs."

DiNozzo watched Gibbs' face go from a scowl to a grin to amused and wondered what was being said on the other side of the phone.

When Gibbs hung up, he had a most satisfied look. "Alright people, let's call it a day." He stood and waited for McGee's reaction.

Tim closed his eyes and took a couple of deep breaths. When he reopened his eyes he turned to look at Roger, he didn't realize that he had reached up and grabbed onto one of Ziva's arms. "We … I need to stop home first before going to the s-s-s." He paused. _Damn it! I don't want to stutter!_ "The safe house. Not only do I need clothes, but I need to take care of my dog."

Roger nodded. "Of course, Agent McGee. Whatever you need. If you wish, you can bring your dog with you." He turned to look at the rest of the team. "I'm sure you understand that I cannot disclose the location of one of our safe houses. Agent McGee can be in contact by phone only."

Gibbs knew he was dead on when McGee stuttered. This was going to feel good. DiNozzo had started to object when Gibbs let them in on what his phone call had been about. "No need to worry about that Staff Sergeant, everyone knows where my house is."

McGee's head snapped around, relief played in his eyes, but still had a worry. "Are you sure, Boss?"

"Do you even have to ask Tim?"

"I just … it's going to be a pain … you don't have to put yourself out for me. I'll be ok at the Air Force's safe house." Tim really wanted to be somewhere where his team knew his location, but to have Gibbs offer his own house was overwhelming.

Roger was stunned at even the suggestion. "Sir, with all due respect, Agent McGee needs to be somewhere the suspect doesn't know about. He could very well know where all of Agent McGee's co-workers live. For his safety, I cannot authorize such a change." After everything he saw today, Roger couldn't believe that they would risk Tim in such away.

"Trust me Staff Sergeant, my house is far safer than any safe house could possibly be." Gibbs turned to McGee and pointed a finger at him. "And you, you should know better!"

DiNozzo smiled, "That's right McGee, you're the only one who's never had to take refuge at Gibbs'. Think of it as initiation."

Tim and Roger started with other objections when Vance came down the stairs. "I have spent all day talking with SecNav and SecAF, and have assured them that Gibbs' is the safest place for my Agent right now." He gave a hard look to Roger. "If you have any objections, please come to my office, **now**."

Roger nodded curtly, motioned to his men to stay with McGee, and went upstairs with Vance. Vance looked over the MCRT and gave a sly smile.

When Vance and Roger disappeared, Tony went over to McGee's desk. Ziva and Tim were still in the same position. "Ok you two love birds, let's not forget Rule 12." Tony wagged his eyebrows conspiratorially.

McGee blushed when he realized what he and Ziva must look like and removed his hand. "Tony …"

"Jealous?" Ziva gave a wicked grin and gently tightened her arms around McGee. "But of which one of us?"

It was Tony's turn to blush, "What! I don't swing that way! I would never … not there is anything wrong with … but with Tim?… not that there's anything wrong with Tim … I've always wondered if he would … not for myself …"

"Did I not tell you, McGee?" Her smile became down right ruthless.

"Tell him what?" DiNozzo looked at them confused. "Come on now, let me in on it."

McGee was almost beaming at the normalcy of it all. "Definitely not into threesomes. You Ziva?"

Ziva's smile soften as Tim joined in the teasing. "I do not know McGee, it can be quite fun with the right partners."

Now both Tim and Tony blushed.

Gibbs smirked at the banter. He knew what he was going to say next would add to it. "You three better not do that all night or else, I'll have you doing laps around my neighborhood!"

It was comical as his three agents turned to Gibbs in unison.

"Alright! Sleepover! I'll bring the movies!" DiNozzo practically jumped with enthusiasm.

"Why you?" Ziva scowled.

"Who else better!" Tony went over and pulled McGee out of Ziva's embrace and noticed that the shaking did not return. "What are you in the mood for, I've got anything you can want. Well, almost anything. No geek movies." He threw an arm around Tim's shoulders.

McGee had a lighthearted face as he replied. "What constitutes a 'geek' move per say?"

Ziva frowned a little, but caught up to DiNozzo and McGee, with Gibbs bringing up the rear.

"You know Probie! Sci-Fi epics or beat-you-over-the-head to think movies."

"Sci-Fi epics? Come on Tony, you like Star Wars, too."

"What celebrities would be fighting?" Ziva asked with a quirk to her head.

Tony and Tim looked at each other. "Star Wars it is!" They replied in unison.

Gibbs herded them all, including the two airmen, into the elevator when the doors opened. His two 'boys' were still arguing the merits of the original three vs. the recent three sets of Star Wars movies when the doors closed.

At the top of the stairs, Vance and Roger had looked on in amusement. "Now do you understand Staff Sergeant?"

Roger looked over to the Director. "Yes, sir!" A smile playing at the corners of his mouth. He nodded and left to report to his superiors the events of the day. _What a report this is going to make!_ Roger thought as he left NCIS.


	11. Chapter 11

Thank you to all who have continued to read and review. Your response has been overwhelming! If I have missed responding to anyone personally, I apologize.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of the NCIS charcaters, only the ones I've created for my story. (OH! And Season 8 that I just bought!)

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><p>The conversation was light all the way to McGee's apartment.. They had taken a company car, since the Porsche would have never fit all four of them, the airmen were following behind. Tim pointed Gibbs to his designated parking space. The airmen parked on the street.<p>

Gibbs waited in the car while the other three went up and watched the two airmen follow. _At least they are taking this detail seriously._

He wanted to make some phone calls. He knew Abby would never forgive him if she was left out. Also, there was Ducky and Palmer. Ducky would help him keep his sanity, and Palmer … well he said he wanted to help.

Gibbs felt like he was planning a party instead of security for a safe house, but he knew it would be best for McGee, at least for the first night. After that, he would have to play it by ear. He hoped this case could be wrapped up quickly, as much for McGee's sake, as well as his own. He loved his team like a family, but he had lived so long on his own that it wouldn't bode well for anyone if he had be host for the six of them for any extended period of time.

However, Gibbs would never admit, even to himself, that he was actually looking forward to this.

XXX

The rustling of keys at the door had the one occupant of the apartment wagging his tail in excitement. As soon as McGee stepped through the door, Jethro bounded over to him and jumped up to greet his master.

"Whoa, whoa, easy fella!" Tim laughed out. He gently pushed Jethro back onto the floor and followed him down to give a good scratching behind the ears.

Tony and Ziva followed in and the two airmen stood guard outside the door in the hall.

Jethro could sense that something was off with his master, he let out a small whine.

"I'm okay boy. Come here." Tim tapped his shoulder. Jethro came over and rested his head on the shoulder McGee hand indicated.

Tim hugged his dog and found it very hard to keep his emotions under wraps. He always felt he could let loose around his dog, after all, who was Jethro going to tell. He gave a small laugh at his thoughts, but grabbed onto Jethro more. _I have to get it together! I'm acting like such a baby! I already lost it in front of Gibbs, I can't let the whole team seem me like that!_

A gentle hand was placed on his other shoulder, "Hey buddy, you okay?" Came DiNozzo's worried voice.

McGee pulled away from Jethro. "Yeah, I'm fine. I just missed my dog, alright." He turned to look up at Tony. "Don't go thinking anything weird about that." He said in a stern 'don't mess with me' voice.

Tony gave a faltering smile. _Why is Tim trying so hard to bottle all this up?_ Tony decided to go with it, for now. "Oh, and what could I be thinking … hum, let me see … oh I know! McGee is in to bestiality! Or wait, you can only relate to dogs, what's why all the pretty girls get away! Or … OW!"

Ziva had heard enough of his rantings and decided to put an end to it with a well placed elbow.

Tim smile. "Yeah, anything like that." He straighten up. "Come on boy, let get an overnight bag back." He headed to his bedroom. Jethro gave a 'wuf' and followed behind.

Once McGee was in his bedroom and closed the door behind him, Tony turned to Ziva. "You didn't have to hit so hard, ya know!"

"I had to make it realistic."

He rubbed his sore ribs, "Too realistic if you ask me." His face dropped. "He going to be okay, Ziva?"

"It will take time. However, he got through it once, I am confident he can again." Although, Ziva didn't sound as sure of herself as she thought.

"I don't know how he did. Especially with no help from his parents. I wonder if they even know."

Ziva sighed. "If what the Staff Sergeant said is true, maybe it is better if they do not."

He looked over at Tim's bedroom door. "Why would he let us believe he had such a perfect childhood? I mean, I was pretty harsh about it sometimes. Jealous is more like it." Tony gave a wry laugh to himself. "If anything, its Tim who should have been jealous."

Ziva was watching the door as well. "Sometimes it is easier to go along with what others believe they know about you. It is like being undercover, you give a small piece of information and let everyone else draw their own conclusions."

"And here I thought Tim could never do undercover jobs."

"You do not think him skilled enough?"

"I never thought he could stand to lie that much."

Now, Ziva looked at Tony. "You feel as though you have been lied to" It was a statement, not a question. She narrowed her eyes at him.

DiNozzo shook his head. "Not really. I can understand why he would never want to talk about this. I mean, how do you even bring it up … 'Hey guys, guess what happened to me when I was nine!' … yeah, that's a real ice breaker there."

"Then what?"

Tony turned fully to face Ziva. "I feel as though I've taken for granted who McGee really is. I wanted so badly for there to be a perfect family out there, that I forced that idea onto him and he just let me. Instead of throwing up in my face, he let me run with my ego."

"Do you think he said nothing to spare **your **feelings?" Ziva was getting angry. "Maybe it was easier not to relive all that torment just to prove you wrong. Not everything is about you, Tony."

DiNozzo frowned. "Why are you getting upset?"

Ziva opened her mouth to respond, but close it instead. _Why, indeed._ She would have to go into her feelings about what had happened to her years ago. She thought she was past it, even her psychologist said so, but occasionally would those feelings come back to haunt her, like now. She knew DiNozzo was waiting for an answer.

"I am sorry, Tony. I am just being over-protective." She hoped he would drop it at that.

He studied her for a moment. He knew there was more to it, but again, let the issue drop "Sure, Ziva." _If Ziva wanted to talk, she could have at any point once we brought her back. Like I said to Abby, it's all about Tim right now._ He turned back to the bedroom door. "You almost done in there McGoo?"

A shaky "Sure Tony" wafted out of the closed door. Tony started to walk to the bedroom, but Ziva placed a hand on his arm to stop him. When he looked at her, she just shook her head.

He turned back to the door. _Don't go through this alone, Tim. We are here, just reach out to us._ He knew that it was going to be very difficult for McGee to do. As Abby said, Tim was not very needy, he always seemed to pull himself together. DiNozzo now wished he had taken more time to show McGee it was okay to reach out to him.

_What would you have done if he had?_ Tony chastised himself. _Laughed at him, made fun of him, told everyone at work!_ Tony just stared at the door. _Please Tim, give me a chance to … just give me a chance._

Tony and Ziva waited in silence for their partner.

XXX

When McGee had gone into his bedroom, he unconsciously closed the door behind him. He pulled out his over night bag and started packing items for a few days. "I hope we don't have to put the Boss out for more than that. He might end up firing me just to get me out of his house." Tim laughed, but it sounded hollow even to him.

Jethro stared at him. His tail was twitching and he let out a low whine.

Tim grabbed a couple of the dog toys and held them out to Jethro. "Ok, which one do you want to take. You can only pick one."

Jethro walked up to him, but instead of choosing a toy, he licked Tim's left hand, looked up at him sadly, and whined again.

Tim's control was wavering. He knew it was dumb, but he could be completely himself around Jethro. How many nights had he come home and vented to the dog and was glad he could get all of it out without having any judgments or repercussions. He plopped down on his bed and patted the space next to him.

Jethro was by his side immediately, looking at him with an expectant gaze.

McGee starting scratching behind Jethro's ears. "I wish all of this would have stayed buried. I haven't thought about any of it for a very, very long time." He moved his hand down to Jethro's back. "Now, my whole team gets to find out about the real me … the me I've tried so hard to change." He went from scratching, to petting.

"You know, Gibbs said I'm amazing. Yeah, an amazing fool." Tears were starting to cascade down his face. He used his free hand to angrily wipe them away. "This is the third time today that I've cried, god, I'm such a wuss."

Jethro leaned his body against his master's chest, giving support the only way a dog could.

Tim wrapped his other arm around his dog and buried his head in Jethro's neck, and cried. Cried in anger and in frustration and in shame. He made sure to keep his crying quiet, it was bad enough Gibbs had seen him break down, he didn't need Tony and Ziva to see it too.

_They'll never trust me to have their six again. Gibbs won't want me out in the field anymore, I'll be too much of a liability. He has barely tolerated me up to this point what does he feel about me now? Will any of them even want me on the team anymore? I'm worthless if I can't go out into the field. I'm worthless … worthless. Guess Dad was right all along._

He let all of his terrible thoughts run rampant through his mind and was getting overwhelmed. In his effort to stay quiet, his breathing was low and shallow, which was making him lightheaded and his hands were going numb. _Great! A panic attack! Just what a geek nobody would do at a time like this!_

A small voice started breaking through his thoughts. 'I know these memories have power right now, but just remember they are **your **memories. You control them, make them do what you want, even if that is to just go away.' McGee started to calm down at Ziva's remembered words.

As he focused on her words, more from his team broke through his cloud of self-doubt. Tony, saying he wouldn't let anyone hurt him and Gibbs saying that he would protect him this time around. All of them letting him know that this time, he wasn't alone. His breathing regulated, his hand regained their feeling, and his head cleared.

He lifted his head from Jethro, who looked up at him and licked away the tears. McGee gave a small laugh. "Thanks boy, you really know how to cheer me up." Jethro wagged his tail "Maybe I should have a little more faith in my team, they are most definitely not my parents." He looked at Jethro. "What do you think?"

Jethro's tail wagged even faster. He gave a soft "woof" as his answer.

He smiled and once again scratched behind Jethro's ears. "I knew you would say that." He heard DiNozzo call for him, "You almost done in there McGoo?"

McGee looked at his closed door, dried his eyes and cleared his throat. "Sure Tony", he replied, trying to sound normal, but even to himself, his voice was shaky.

He looked down at Jethro. "Do you think they bought it?" Jethro just titled his head to the side. "Nah, neither do I. Let's finish packing before Tony and Ziva come busting in here and get all touchy feely. What do you say?"

Jethro gave a full bark this time. Tim gave his dog one last quick squeeze of a hug, got up and finished packing.


	12. Chapter 12

I just wanted to say that I haven't gotten a chance to read the new reviews. I was online long enough to post, then I spent the day in remembrance. I, fortunately, did not know anyone directly or personally who lost their life, but wanted to make sure to take the time to honor all of their loss and sacrifice.

I am working very late tonight, so I may not get to respond to yesterday's or today's, so I just want to say thank you in advance. (Also, I have some stories that I am following, which I am very excited to see some new chapters are up!)

You all know the drill - I own none of NCIS.

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><p>Gibbs knew something had happened as soon as he saw his three agents. Gone was the lightheartedness that they had left with. McGee's eyes were red and slightly swollen, he had been crying. Tony and Ziva were tense. <em>Damn it! Tim must have closed himself off to deal with all of this own his own. Doesn't he know better!<em> However, as they piled into the car, he knew that McGee didn't know how to reach out for help. All of his life, he had to go it alone, and being on Team Gibbs hadn't help with that mind set.

How often had he pushed McGee to just suck it up and keep working, and he did. Finding results to guide the team in the right direction, or offering a different way to look at the evidence they already had. He had never let the team down, no matter what he was going through.

Now, Gibbs was expecting him to just throw away thirty plus years of a learned behavior. It was going to be hard. Gibbs and the rest of the team were going to need to step it up.

Ziva sat in the back with McGee and Jethro, allowing Tim his space, but still keeping a careful eye on him.

Jethro was sitting in Tim's lap. Both dog and master were watching the scenery pass by.

DiNozzo was the first to break the silence, "So, Boss, do you even own a DVD player?"

Gibbs knew that Tony was trying to break the solemn mood and played along. "As a matter of fact DiNozzo, I don't."

"Great! What are we going to do about the movie! We can't be there all night watching the 'Gibbs builds a boat' channel!"

Gibbs reached behind DiNozzo and gave him a sharp head slap. "Guess you should have thought about that before you suggested anything."

A small voice came from the back. "I brought my portable player and every type of cord I have. I'll get us hooked up." McGee replied while still keeping his focus outside of the car.

Tony took Tim's participation as encouragement and turned around in his seat to face the back passengers. "Alright Probie! Being a Boy Scout finally comes in handy!"

McGee gave a very slight smile, but didn't look at his team. DiNozzo kept pushing. "How should we watch the movies, in chapter order or release date order?"

"Would it not be the same?" Ziva asked in a confused voice, she looked from Tony to Tim. _Come on McGee, fight back from this._

"Not with this one, right Probie …" He hoped McGee would follow his lead.

Tim finally turned to look at his team. "He's right Ziva. See, what happened was …"

Gibbs relaxed as Tim explained to Ziva, and Tony interrupted, and the usual banter returned.

They were all going to fight to make sure that McGee knew he had help this time around. Gibbs drove the rest of the way to his house learning more about Star Wars from both a film and technical side than he ever wanted. He decided that head slaps could be forgone, just this once.

XXXX

When they arrived at Gibbs' house, Abby, Palmer, Ducky, and three new airmen were already there.

McGee paused as he came out of the car, he had managed to forget about being under protective custody during the car ride over and was now remembering everything from earlier today. _Stop this McGee! You're a Federal Agent! Not some scared little kid! You need a head slap or two … or dozen_.

Gibbs had noticed McGee's reaction and his pause to get his emotions under control. Gibbs sighed as he walked over and introduced himself to the second shift replacements of the protection detail, Staff Sergeant Alex Boyer, Airmen Craig Starcher and Deron Hertzog. Airmen Williams and Settie came over to bring their replacements up to speed.

While Gibbs was talking to the Air Force personnel, DiNozzo walked over to McGee and gave him a light punch in the arm. "Hey buddy, let's let the Bossman take care of the details. You need to get in there and get his archaic TV ready for our movies!"

"Sure Tony." McGee gave a half hearted smile and grabbed his stuff and called for his dog. "Come on boy." Then his smile turned a little mischievous. "Oh, and bring Jethro, too."

Ziva snorted at the joke. DiNozzo, however, had not realized the joke right away. His face went from shocked, to indignant, to pleased. "Hey! That's not very nice!" He looked over to Ziva, she was smiling.

"Oh, I do not know Tony, I think he got it right." Ziva looked at Tim and smiled

McGee knew Tony and Ziva had tried very hard to keep him out of the abyss of his own thoughts on the way over. He wasn't going to allow his own petty insecurities to wipe all of that away. If his team was trying so hard, then he owed it to them to try as well. His smile broadened as he reached out and petted Tony's head. "And if you're really good, I'll give you a treat."

Tony swatted Tim's hand away. "Oh and what do you think you have that will be a treat for me?"

Tim just smiled even more and started walking to the house with Jethro to his left. Ziva picked up in step with him on his right. She knew that McGee was trying for them more than for himself, but the fact that he was indeed trying was very encouraging.

DiNozzo smiled and followed behind. "Hey! Come on! What would be my treat?" He knew he wouldn't get an answer, but the banter felt good.

Gibbs had kept an ear on his team. He wasn't quite as happy about the banter as the others. He too, could tell that Tim was doing it to make everyone else feel better. It was in the way he took time to respond and the careful placement of reach barb. He also knew that McGee's own emotions were going to crashing in on him, soon. _When that happens, we will be there to guide you through it._

He focused back on the airmen as they went through the rotation and placement of each man.

XXXX

Inside, McGee readied himself for an Uber-Abby hug when he heard her squeal. However, instead of flying to him, she went to Jethro. He just raised an eyebrow at her.

"Oh come on! I get to see you all the time." She fawned over the dog.

McGee smiled and shook his head.

Ziva and Tony exchanged looks. They weren't sure if to be happy or not that Abby wasn't all over Tim. They decided it was best that she wasn't, and they nodded to each other.

DiNozzo grabbed McGee's arm. "Come on. Let's get you started. Who knows what you're going to need to do to get Gibbs' TV ready for movie viewing. I don't know if you want him to see you at it."

"Tony, it's not like I'm going to take it apart and reassemble it." He looked at Gibbs old style floor model TV. "Although, that might be fun. I haven't looked inside of …"

He received as Gibb's slap as said man came through his front door. "No taking apart of anything!"

McGee chuckled and went to work with DiNozzo keeping him company. Gibbs retreated to his kitchen where Ducky and Palmer were getting the food ready. He walked in, just in time to hear Ducky's story of the first time he had attempted to cook on his own.

Ziva was still with Abby. Something was bothering her about Abby, but she didn't know quite what it was. When McGee had walked away, Abby hugged Jethro even tighter, as though she was using the dog for grounding.

That wasn't terrible, better the dog than McGee right now. However, Jethro wanted to be close to his master and tried to pull away. Abby wouldn't let him, she held on tighter. Jethro started to whine and pull harder to get away.

"No, Jethro, stay with me." Abby was sure that Jethro was going to be happy to see her, after all, she was the only one who believed he was innocent. She was the one who saved his life. She was the one who had given him to Tim. She thought for sure that Jethro would stick to her like glue.

However, Jethro loved his master and that's where is loyalties lied. Being the gentle dog he was, he wouldn't growl or nip at a person, unless ordered to, so he just pulled even harder and started to whine louder.

McGee, buried in the backside of Gibb's TV, heard his dog's discomfort, but did not see the reason why. He figured that the dog wasn't sure where he was allowed to go in the new house and was waiting for direction. _Great! Some fine dog owner you make!_ "Jethro! Come, it's ok."

If Abby heard Tim call his dog, she made no indication. Ziva frowned and then sighed. She reached down and touched Abby's shoulder softly, but firm. "Abby, McGee is calling for his dog. Let Jethro go."

Abby looked up sad and lost. "Oh, ok." She turned back to Jethro and felt a little betrayed. _Even he doesn't want my hugs anymore._ As soon as she let go of him, he took off to be at McGee's side.

Abby stood and started to say something, but Ziva held up her hand, then point to her ear, and nodded towards McGee.

"Sorry, boy. I shouldn't have just left you standing there. It's okay for you to come in here, just no sitting on the couch. I haven't cleared that with the Boss yet."

Abby stared at Ziva. "I just needed a little reassurance. After what happened in the bullpen, I didn't want to go to Tim again." Abby was staring at her feet. "I guess Jethro doesn't like me anymore."

Ziva sighed. "Abby this has nothing to do with you." It came out a little harsher than she had intended, but she didn't try to apologize for it. "Jethro knows that something is wrong with McGee. He is his master, you are not. McGee needs him, you do not. It is as simple as that."

"Oh, and when have you become a 'dog whisperer'. First you're an expert on Timmy and now Jethro. I guess you just know it all." Abby's eyes flashed and her voice rose.

DiNozzo looked up and glared at the two women. Ziva nodded her understanding, grabbed Abby's arm and drug her outside.

"Tony?"

He looked down to his partner who was wearing a confused look. "Abby just forgot something in the car. Ziva went with her."

McGee's green eyes went from confused to sad. He looked as though he was going to say something, but then turned his attention back to Gibbs' TV.

DiNozzo frowned. He knew that McGee really needed let his emotions out. He put a hand on McGee's shoulder, "Tim …"

"Don't worry Tony, I'll have this set up in no time."

"Tim look …"

"DiNozzo, come in here and give me a hand."

Tony looked over to his Boss, aggravated, but after a quick squeeze to McGee's shoulder, he went over to Gibbs.

Before he could say anything, Gibbs started. "I need your help bringing up chairs from the basement, come on."

"Boss, should we really leave …"

"Don't worry, Ducky will take care of everything up here." Gibbs started towards his basement knowing Tony was following.

XXXX

They had barley made it to the basement floor when Tony started. "Boss, how can you just leave him alone like that? He's wound so tight that he's going to snap if he doesn't let it out soon! Man, why won't he just let it out?" Tony was pacing and ran his hand through his hair in frustration.

"Oh, is that what we have taught him."

DiNozzo stopped cold. "Huh? What do you mean Boss?"

"I hate to admit it DiNozzo, but all these years, we have taught Tim that personal issues only get in the way of a case. To just suck it up and keep going. Deal with everything later, in private, where it won't affect anyone else."

"We have?"

Gibbs nodded his head. "You with Jeanne. Him with, oh lets see, getting attacked by a dog or his girlfriend trying to kill him."

Tony lowered his head. "Damn."

"So now, we expect him to open up just because we are ready to be all warm and fuzzy. Doesn't work that way."

"You, warm and fuzzy Boss?" DiNozzo cocked his head and gave a half smile.

Gibbs, however, wasn't ready for the comedy just yet. "Think about this: When has Tim been the best this whole day?"

Tony took a moment to think, then the truth hit him like a ton of bricks. His head and shoulders slumped. "When we've been acting like nothing's happened. Same old banter, same old jokes."

Gibbs grabbed the chairs he was looking for and walked up to DiNozzo and nodded. "Right. He's doing just what we've taught him."

"How do we un-teach him?"

"We don't, we keep the status quo. What we do is wait."

Tony finally looked up at his Boss. "Wait? For what?"

"You're right about one thing Tony, he is going to break holding all of that in. We wait for then. We show him that no matter what, we will support him and when he does break, we will be there to pick up the pieces."

"I hate seeing him like that."

"So do I, but we have to do this on his terms."

Tony looked up and allowed a quirk of a smile. "So when did you became a psychology guru?"

Gibbs allowed himself to relax know that this was Tony's way of agreeing. "When you joined the team." He smiled, just a little, at DiNozzo's confused face and started up the stairs. "Come on, or Tim's going to start without you."

Tony just shook his head and turned to follow Gibbs up the steps. _Keep the status quo, huh. Then why has he started calling McGee, Tim._ He smiled. _I guess the Bossman can be warm and fuzzy when he wants._

"You coming DiNozzo!"

"On your six Boss!" Tony grinned to himself as he climbed the stairs.


	13. Chapter 13

Again, thank you for all of the reviews. As you can probably tell, I'm not a very big fan of the way Abby treats Tim. Through reading many fanfics & the progression of the show, I am a VERY big McZiva fan ... although this is not a ship story, it's a team story.

Hope you all enjoy!

Disclaimer - you know the drill - not mine & no money received - although I can dream.

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><p>Ziva yanked Abby to a stand still in front of her. "Speak."<p>

Abby glared at Ziva. "I am not a dog and who put you in charge anyway."

Ziva crossed her arms and stood silently waiting. She knew Abby needed to get this out if she was to be any good to McGee.

She didn't need to wait long as Abby started pacing waving her arms in the air.

"I mean first you keep me from giving Timmy a proper hug in the Director's office. Then you sit next to him, since when do you ever pay attention to him." She rounded on Ziva. "Tony's your partner, not Tim." She stared right into Ziva's eyes.

Ziva narrowed her eyes dangerously. She wanted to say something, but decided to wait until Abby had said her peace. Otherwise, this was going to get ugly.

Abby saw the danger in Ziva's eyes, but she didn't care. She was so full of emotion, she was going to burst. "Then hovering over him all day. What's with that!" She took a step towards Ziva.

Ziva didn't move or change expression.

"Then … then you chase me away while I'm hugging him! And you're all over him! Who do you think you are!" She took another step forward. She was now touching noses with Ziva.

The stared at each other before Ziva spoke. "Step back." Her voice full of ice and steel.

"No! Explain yourself, Ziva! Why are you …" Abby stopped when her emotions caught in her throat.

"Why am I, what?"

Abby's face crumbled into tears and she took a step backwards. "Why are you stealing my best friend?"

Ziva sighed and let Abby cry for a few moments before she tried to talk to her. When she spoke, her voice was softer, but still firm. "First of all, McGee is just as much my partner as Tony. Do not ever think otherwise." It was Ziva's turn to take a step forward.

This time, Abby stepped backwards.

"Second, none of this has been about taking McGee from you. This is all about helping him get through this situation."

"But he's always turned to me! Why is it different now?"

"Have you ever been held down while someone violates you?"

Abby was stunned into silence. She opened her mouth to respond, but couldn't figure out what to say. She closed her mouth and tried again, but again, no words would come. She looked like a fish out of water.

"Have you ever been afraid just because of a sound? Afraid because you know, no matter if you fight or not, there is nothing you can do to prevent what is going to happen to you. Afraid because you have no hope of anything changing?" Ziva's voice had started to tremble. However, this was one time that she was not going to shove her emotions away.

"I hope you never do, Abby. Of all of things that I have wanted to find common ground with my teammates, I have never wanted it to be over something like this." A stray tear fell that Ziva wiped away with vehemence. "But, until you can understand the overwhelming fear of just living day to day, you are not the one who can help McGee."

Abby lowered her head and wrapped her arms around herself. Still crying, she was finally able to find her voice. "What do I do, Ziva? I want to help him! I want him to be able to lean on me like I've always leaned on him. I hate to see him hurting so much!" She looked up, desperate. "What do I do!"

Ziva smiled and took a moment to stamp down her emotions back where they belonged. "We let him set the pace. We let him be strong when he can and hold on to him when he cannot."

Ziva took another step forward, but this time the steel was gone. She wrapped her friend in a hug. "I know this is hard, but it is hardest on McGee. He is going to think our opinions of him have changed in the light of the new information we now have."

Abby energetically hugged her back. "No way! How can …"

"Because he always thinks the worst of himself. We must be strong enough to show him we have not changed."

"I'm not used to being strong."

Ziva pulled her back out of the hug. She held Abby by the arms and looked directly into her eyes. "Then you must distance yourself from McGee."

"What?" Abby was just starting to feel better, Ziva now took all of that away.

"He needs our strength. If you are unable to give him that, then, for his sake, you must distance yourself. You will only hurt him otherwise. He will be so worried about how this is affecting you, he will bury all of it inside of himself. He will pretend nothing is wrong and in this case, it will overwhelm him."

"But you guys always pretend nothing is wrong. Why does this time have to be different?"

Ziva studied Abby. She truly wanted to understand, there was no selfishness this time.

"Because, this time, he is a target. If he is hiding anything from us, he could be placed in unnecessary danger. And …" Ziva paused as a wave of protectiveness hit her.

"And?"

"… and because I do not like to see him hurting either. If he knows that I am strong enough to whether his storms, he will not feel so alone." Ziva willed Abby to understand.

Abby slightly nodded. "I get it. Really, I do." She smiled.

Ziva released her and nodded. "Then let us go inside before they start without us, yes?"

They both turned to the door, lost in their own thoughts, but ready to put on their 'game' face for McGee's sake.

XXXX

McGee, now alone, leaned his forehead against the back of the TV. _Great, just great! I'm tearing the whole team apart! It was selfish of me coming here. I should have just gone with Roger._

"Well, Timothy how is the surgery coming along?"

McGee jumped at the sound of Ducky's voice. He hadn't even heard Ducky come into the room. "Surgery? Oh, fine. I'm almost done." He went back to the TV, however he was so distracted by his thoughts that he touched an exposed wire. "Ouch! Damn it!"

"Oh dear. Let me look at that."

"No, I'm fine."

Ducky frowned and then bent down next to McGee. "Timothy, let me see that hand now young man."

"Ducky …"

Dr. Mallard soften both his expression and his voice. "You know, this would go easier if you just let us fuss over you."

McGee closed his eyes and leaned his forehead on the back of the TV for a second time. "I just want to fade into the background again." It was said so softly that, if Ducky hadn't been close, he never would have heard.

Ducky mirrored Tony's action earlier and place a hand on McGee's shoulder. "My dear boy, whatever do you mean?"

McGee straightened and looked Ducky directly in his eyes. "Come on Ducky, we all know that I'm the back up support. I'm not used to getting all of this attention. I mean sure, it has happened a couple of time like with my sister and Landon, but it was all centered around the case, not me directly."

"Timothy, we all worry about the toll this job takes on us."

McGee shook his head. "Not me."

"Timothy …"

"No, when Jethro attacked me …" His dog lifted his head from the floor, McGee reached out and reassuringly petted the dog. "… when Amanda, er a Julia tried to kill me, when I've been tazered, and about a dozen other times, it's always been, 'just push ahead and solve the case'." He took a moment to look down at his dog.

"I don't understand why this time can't be the same. I just want to forget about me being apart of this and focus only on the case." He wouldn't look back at Ducky.

Dr. Mallard sighed as he realized that Team Gibbs had taught the young man in front of him that it was the status quo to ignore the personal affects of the job. "I know that Jethro pushes all of you to always perform at your best through some of the worst circumstances. However, I believe he is always concerned about the after affects of each case has on all of you."

Again, McGee shook his head.

"I know that it can seem …"

McGee cocked his head slightly toward Ducky. "Maybe if it was Abby, Tony, or Ziva … or even you or Palmer. But it's different with me." A strange look crossed Ducky's face. "Oh, I don't mean that in a bad way. I never expected anything else."

Ducky gave McGee's shoulder a squeeze. "Lad, I can assure you that you are just as important as any one of us."

"I know, but important in a different way."

"How so?"

McGee took a moment to think. He was so used to his place on the team, he never took the time to express it in thoughts or words. "I'm important … like …" then a light bulb came on "… like a laptop or cell phone." He smiled to Ducky.

Ducky, however, didn't smile back. "Do you honestly think of yourself as just a piece of equipment?"

McGee nodded. "A very special piece of equipment. Like Abby's Mass Spectrometer or your scalpel. Neither one of you could do your job without them."

Ducky narrowed his eyes. "Those can be replaced."

"Yeah, but once you've got it just right, it's a big hassle to replace. I don't know what Abby would do if she had to break in a new Mass Spec." He smiled wistfully and turned back to petting his dog.

"Timothy, please face me."

McGee turned back to Ducky. "I am sorry that we, as a team or individually, have never shown you just how important you are on a personal level."

"It's okay Ducky. Just being allowed to be part of the MCRT is more than I ever expected." His smile finally fell. "I just want it to go back to normal. To be told 'Keep your head in the game McGee and get back to work'. I don't know how to take everybody like this … and its tearing them apart." Guilt heavy in his voice.

Ducky was going to start to press the issue, but at the sounds of DiNozzo and Gibbs coming back up from the basement, McGee ended the conversation.

"I better get this ready." He stopped petting his dog and went back to connecting wires.

Ducky stood up, unsure of how best to break through to McGee. He was going to need to speak with Gibbs. He looked at the two men as they walked in the room. He gave a sad shake of his head and walked away.

"You got that working yet McGeek?"

"Patience is a virtue, Tony."

"Since when have we ever had patience!" DiNozzo replied as he set up a couple of chairs.

McGee chuckled. "Never. Alright, just give me … ok, done." He stood up and dusted off his hands a fake smile plastered on his face.

DiNozzo gave the same. "Great! Now all we need are popcorn and the girls!"

Palmer walked in. "Well, here is the popcorn."

The front door opened admitting a sheepish looking Abby and a nonchalant Ziva. "You have not started with out us?" Ziva asked.

Gibbs looked over all of them. They all needed some type of release. He and Tony had decided to wait for McGee to make the first move and could tell that Ziva and Abby had also come to the same conclusion. Until then, it was business as normal. "We were just about to. Pick a seat and we'll get started."

Everyone filed in, found a spot to sit and settled in as McGee started with Episode I of the Star Wars saga.


	14. Chapter 14

Thank you to all who are reading, have reviewed, and have alerted this story. Your response has been overwhelming and I am so grateful and honored. I apologize for not being able to respond to reach review personally, but unfortunately work got in the way. I will try to get back on track, but this week is going to be busy for me. Thanks for keep reading and know that I am so happy to hear from each of you, even if I don't get to respond back.

For those of you on Facebook - did anyone participate in the live conversation with the NCIS writers last night? I wanted to so much, but was working. I really like to have told them a thing or two about how they never give McGee any good story arcs. Oh well, here hoping some of us did!

Anyway - now that I've babbled enough, on with the story. Disclaimer: NCIS belongs to someone much more fortunate than I, just having some fun.

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><p>The couch was deferred to Gibbs and Ducky. Palmer took a chair and set it up on the other side of Ducky.<p>

McGee sat on the floor in front of the couch so that he could sit with his dog, on Gibbs' right.

Tony decided to take the chair closest to McGee, much to Abby's chagrin. She was going to try to sit in between Gibbs and Ducky, but Ziva put an end to that.

"Abby, would you sit next to me?" Ziva patted the chair next to her. "I am sure that I will need some of this explained to me, and I do not want to have to depend on Tony alone." She shot DiNozzo a mean, but playful look. "I never know what he will end up telling me."

Abby frowned slightly, but then reset her features. "Sure Ziva! Besides, I'd probably just end up explaining his explanation." She gave a small smile to Ziva, who nodded approvingly back.

"Hey! What's that supposed to mean! I'd have you know …"

"Can it DiNozzo! Tim start the movie before he really gets going." Gibbs nudged McGee in the back with his knee.

Tim smiled slightly. "Sure Boss." He pressed play on his remote. Jethro had settled across Tim's lap and both master and dog were quite comfortable.

They could barley watch the movie with everyone throwing in remarks after every major scene. It was more of a debating session instead of a movie night.

About half way through the movie, Gibbs felt a pressure on his right knee. He looked down to see McGee slumped against him, fast asleep. Before Gibbs could think about what he was doing, he reached out and laid a protective hand on the top of Tim's head.

DiNozzo turned to drag McGee into the debate he was currently having with the girls. He smiled wide at the sight in front of him. He reached over and smacked Ziva in the arm.

She glared at him until he pointed to the couch, then she too smiled. Even Ducky and Palmer had paused and looked over.

Abby noticed the sudden lack of conversation and that everyone was watching the couch. She stretched her neck around Ziva to see what was up. "Awww …"

Gibbs glared at them. He put a finger to his lips in a silent 'ssshhhh' and then pointed to the TV.

Tony and Ziva nodded and went back to their debate. Ducky and Palmer smiled and returned to watching the debate instead of the movie.

It took Abby a moment, but a memory from long ago, when her brother was young came to mind. He had been fighting sleep because of a case of nightmares that had been plaguing him for days. The family allowed a sleep over and he ended up falling asleep at the monopoly board. However, if it got too quite he would wake up and insist he wasn't asleep at all and continue to play the game until he fell asleep again. She smiled and joined back in the debate.

Sure enough, as the end credits played, McGee roused from his slumber.

McGee felt heavy and blinked rapidly to try to focus. He felt a slight pressure on his head and a strange sensation of being completely safe washed over him. It was the safest he ever felt in his entire life. _I must be hallucinating_, Tim thought. However, he smiled, closed his eyes and nestled closer to what ever it was he was resting against.

Gibbs gave a wistful smile as he felt Tim readjust himself and go back to sleep. It reminded him so much of a time when Kelly had been trying to stay up late with him when he came home from a deployment. She was on the floor playing with her dolls and fell asleep against his leg the same way Tim was now. Every time he tried to move, she would wake up and start playing again. He eventually stayed still long enough to make sure she was completely out, then picked her up and carried her to bed. He knew there would be no carrying of McGee, but he still hated to disturb his agent.

Tony had been watching McGee ever since he saw him dozing against Gibbs. He noticed that Gibbs had not removed his hand from McGee's head. Tony smiled when Tim briefly opened his eyes and then went back to sleep. He had looked so completely content and safe and like a little boy that Tony had to suppress a major urge to reach over and pull Tim into a protective brotherly embrace. Instead, he got up and changed the DVD to the next movie, wondering if Gibbs was going to try to get McGee to actually go lay in a bed. Hoping he wouldn't because Tony wanted to keep his friend close.

Gibbs allowed Tim to stay through the next movie. Again, he stirred when the end credit started playing, but this time, Gibbs didn't allow him to go back to sleep. "Hey McGee, I think its time for you to get to bed." He said in a very gentle, but firm, voice.

"I'mn no't seep …y." Came McGee's tired response.

Team Gibbs smiled. Gibbs ruffled Tim's hair. "Sure, kiddo. Come on, upstairs … or do you expect me to carry you?"

"No, 'course, not." McGee woke his dog, "Come on boy." Tim stood, but he was very wobbly.

Both Tony and Gibbs stood when McGee did, ready to catch their teammate. The hand that had rested protectively on his head, now traveled to his mid-back to keep him from falling. "Say good night, Tim."

"Night." McGee was slightly more alert, but barley. Gibbs followed Tim, keeping his hand on McGee's back all the way up the steps with his namesake following behind.

Everyone in the living room watched the trio disappear upstairs. Abby was the first one to break the silence. "At least he can finally find out what a father is supposed to act like."

Ducky and Palmer nod their agreement, however, Ziva and Tony exchange a confused look. DiNozzo turned to face Abby, "What ch'a mean?"

Abby gave a quick nervous look to Ducky who nodded. "Oh, that's right, Gibbs hasn't had a chance to tell you guys what he and Timmy talked about at the park." She paused. _Do I really want to say this stuff out loud? How could Gibbs repeat this stuff?_ She shook her head.

"Well, are you going to tell us, Abs?" Tony prompted when it seemed as though she wasn't going to continue.

Abby took a deep breath and slowly let it out. "Timmy's dad caught him trying to clean up after … after his attack. He told Tim 'This never happened', helped him clean up and never allowed him to talked about it again. He wouldn't even let Tim go back to school. It wasn't only as punishment, but he was worried that others would figure out what happened and he would be … I don't know … embarrassed, I guess." Abby shook her head, angrily.

Tony and Ziva just stared at her for a moment. Tony found his voice first. "You're kidding right? I know what that Roger guy said, but … No way! How could any dad … I mean even mine would have …" Tony was pacing and his voice getting louder and angrier.

Ziva stood up and stopped Tony by grabbing him by the arms. "Keep your voice down!" she hissed. "Do you want McGee to hear you?"

DiNozzo closed his eyes in an attempt to calm himself. "You're right. Sorry. I just can't believe how much he has had to go through in his life. And alone. No wonder its hard for him to open up to us. Its more than just what we've taught him." He pulled out of Ziva's grasp and turned towards the stairs. "It's the way he's lived his entire life." He turned back around and looked fiercely at all of them. "I want that to change for him. I want him to know that we will always have his six."

Ziva had placed her hands on her hips. She studied Tony for a moment. _I do not know if Tony and Abby are going to be strong enough for McGee._ "I understand your anger. I feel it as well. However, we cannot force ourselves on him. He will open up to us when he is ready."

Ducky frowned. He mainly agreed with Ziva's statements, but did any of them realize how McGee viewed his place on the team. "I partially agree with you Ziva, but he is going to need more than just silent support."

They all turned to Ducky. "What do you mean?" Ziva asked as she cocked her head slightly to the right.

He had really wanted to talk to Gibbs first, but this whole situation had everything all askew. "Let me ask all of you a question: What do you feel is Timothy's place on the team?"

DiNozzo was confused. "His place?"

Dr. Mallard nodded. "Yes, is he just the 'computer geek', or the inexperience agent, or the 'man out' or …"

"McGee has grown much from when I first joined the team. He is a valued and equal member of the team." Ziva stated as if it was the most obvious fact in the world. Tony and Abby nodded in agreement.

Ducky was glad of their immediate response, it spoke to how much McGee actually meant to them. Now for the hard part. "Do you think Timothy knows that?"

"I'm sure he does. I mean I know we were a little, well maybe a lot, hard on him when he first started. But now, he gives back as good as he gets." Tony said enthusiastically.

"Has anyone, either as a team, or individually, ever shown concern when he has been injured?"

"Timmy's never been injured."

"Oh?" Ducky lifted his eyebrows in surprise. "I seem to remember several times."

Abby was completely confused. "When?"

"Let me see, his first meeting with Jethro, the dog not your team leader. As I remember, he was bitten on his arm and neck. It was quite painful for him, he visited me several times that day. I wanted to talk Jet … um Gibbs into sending the poor boy home. However, he pleaded with me not to do so."

Palmer spoke up for the first time. "I remember that day. He came down after Tony had scared him with some DVD or something. His heart was racing and he was having trouble calming down. We almost called an ambulance for him."

Both Abby and Tony looked embarrassed. Palmer noticed their demeanor and felt bad. "I'm sorry. I wasn't saying that to be mean or anything."

Ducky however, was quite please. "No need to apologize for the truth Mr. Palmer." He gave the team a hard look. "Did any of you know this?"

The trio shook their heads.

"I didn't think so. If Timothy would have admitted how hurt he was, would he have been given understanding or been judged as weak?"

No one answered his question.

Palmer felt the heavy atmosphere, it made him uncomfortable, so he broke the silence. "Dr. Mallard, you said there were other times?" He knew this wasn't the best question, but it was all he could think of to say.

"Oh yes, Mr. Palmer. There may not have been many other physcial injuries, but personal or emotional ones take just as much of a toll. For example, the case with his younger sister, when the woman he was seeing turned out to be an assassin. Oh, let's not forget the fallout from his book." He scowled as his anger rose. "I would have thought all of you would have been quite flattered that Timothy thought all of you interesting enough to write about."

Ziva felt a little attacked by Ducky's tone of voice. "No disrespect Ducky, but what does any of this have to do with McGee's place on the team?"

"If you were in his place, how would you feel?"

The three looked at each other, trying to find an answer to the ME's question. Ironically, it was Palmer who answered. "Like I didn't really matter to the team. Like I was just a tool to be used, unnecessary baggage when not."

Ducky turned sadly to his assistant. "Mr. Palmer have you also felt this way?"

Jimmy looked from the team to his mentor. "Me? Oh, no. I know I have a little trouble fitting in and Agent Gibbs still scares me, but …" He paused, as his thoughts turned to many, many years ago.

Dr. Mallard wanted to hear the rest, just to be sure his own charge never felt like just part of the background. "But?"

Palmer's voice turned very sad. "I had a friend in pre-med, Jason. His family ignored him a lot and the circle of friends he hung out with treated him as the butt of all of their jokes. He said a lot of the same things I've hear McGee say about himself." He gave a sad sigh and had a far away look.

Abby prodded him to continue, "What happened with Jason? Is he on the fast track to becoming the next big famously amazing surgeon." She gave a small grin.

However, Palmer shook his head. "He killed himself."

Everyone in the room was shocked. Ducky reached out and grabbed Jimmy's arm. Palmer looked towards his mentor with eyes many years older than his age.

Tears welled up in Abby's eyes. "Oh no! That's terrible. Oh, you don't think Timmy has ever …"

"Oh, no! I didn't mean to imply that." Jimmy shook his head forcefully. "McGee has always seemed to have a greater sense of purpose about him. My friend was just completely lost." Jimmy gave reassuringly, he hoped.

"Tim is stronger than we ever give him credit for." Tony finally participated in the conversation. "I think we have all just gotten used to him being there. Taking crap from all of us and coming back stronger than ever." He shook his head. "He became so important that we forgot about him."

Ziva turned to Tony. "That makes no sense what so ever. If someone is important, are they not on the forefront of your mind?"

"Do you ever think about the air you breath?" DiNozzo said in a dead serious voice.

Ziva narrowed her eyes in thought. "… No …" she cautiously replied. "However, I still do not understand …"

It was Abby who explained. "Without air, we couldn't breath. But since it's always there, we don't think about breathing, we just do it. It's only when we can't breath that we thinking about how to do it and where the air is going to come from for us to take our next breath." She was overloaded with sadness and guilt.

Ziva became contemplative. While Tony nodded in agreement. "Right Abs. Like the saying goes, 'You never know what you have until it's gone.' He's became such a fixture of the team, we forgot to make sure he knew how just important he is."

Dr. Mallard gave a ghost of a smile. "Very good Anthony. With this case, it will be our opportunity to show that young man that he is important to us on a personal level and not just as a piece of equipment." He nodded approvingly. "And it will take more than just acting along the status quo, although we will need to be careful not to push too much."

Ziva gave a determined smiled. "Do not worry Ducky. I think we all have an idea of how to best be there for McGee."

Ducky started to question what she meant, but Gibbs came back down, and, from the look on his face, Dr. Mallard knew it was time to talk to the team leader.

Before anyone could say anything, Ducky made his intentions clear. "Ah, Jethro, would you help me out to the car with my belongings?" He turned to his assistant. "Mr. Palmer would you mind finishing gathering everything?"

Jimmy knew what his mentor wanted and nodded. Gibbs also knew what the ME wanted. "Sure, Duck." The two older men went out the door to have their private conversation.


	15. Chapter 15

Some more emotional stuff this chapter, then we will be getting back to the case. I'm glad you all are sticking with me!

Disclaimer - NCIS is not mine, at least not in this reality!

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><p>Gibbs left his hand on McGee's back all the way up the stairs and gave a little push when they reached the bedroom door.<p>

McGee stumbled forward and flopped onto the bed. Gibbs was sure he was out before his head touched the pillow. Gibbs shook his head and moved to take off McGee's shoes, rousing the younger man.

"Hun? Oh, sorry Boss, I should …"

"Just sleep Tim, I'll take care of it." Once the shoes were removed, he rolled McGee on to his back and took off his jeans. He then tucked his agent securely under the covers.

"Thanks, Boss." McGee's eyes were closed and the words were muffled with sleep.

"Don't worry about it." He gave McGee a pat to his shoulder and then turned to leave the room. He stopped at the door way to watch his sleeping agent.

Jethro had jumped on to the bed with McGee, and snuggled right up against his master. Tim instinctively turned to his side and wrapped an arm around his dog.

With McGee's back to him, Gibbs took in the scene. It should have been heartwarming to see dog and master sleeping soundly together, but for some reason, it made Tim seem lonely and sad. Gibbs stood a moment more and started to leave until he heard the dog whimper.

He stayed still and watched Jethro lick McGee's face. A very quite, small, and sleepy voice spoke to his dog as a hand petted the animal for reassurance. "It'll be better tomorrow, you'll see. I'll get everyone back to normal. I won't let the team be torn apart just because of me." The sound of a yawn filled the room. "I won't let the Boss down. I'll …" another big yawn "…I'll step back into the background and work the case. Show him what a good …" yawn "… agent I am. That I'm …I'm just … like … him …" The hand had stopped moving and a light snore replaced the yawning.

Gibbs was stunned. _What does he mean 'background'? I already know that he's a good agent, hell, he keeps going the way he is and I'll be watching him sworn in as the director someday. And what's with the 'just like me' thing?_ He stood there pondering these questions, he wanted to wake up McGee to get answers, but knew it was better to let the exhausted man sleep. With a shake of his head, he went back downstairs, hoping to find a way to privately speak with Ducky.

Luckily, Dr. Mallard was on the same wave length. So when he was asked outside by his long time friend, Gibbs had no qualms about fulfilling the request.

They stood outside for a few minutes, neither saying a word. Ducky broke the silence. "Something bothering you, Jethro?"

"Yeah." He gave his friend a sideways glance. "Tim mumbled something in his sleep that has me bothered."

"Is it about fading away into the background?"

Gibbs now turned fully to Ducky. "How did you know?"

"He said the same to me while you and Anthony were, um, 'getting chairs' from your basement." Ducky said in a way that suggested he knew the real reason for heading into the basement.

Gibbs rubbed his eyes with one hand in frustration. "What the hell does it mean?"

"Timothy believes that he is nothing more than a piece of equipment for the team to use. Likening himself more to a computer or a cell phone."

"What? I don't understand where he got that idea from. If he feels that way, then I'm even more surprised that he is still so effective with my team."

"Don't misunderstand Jethro, Timothy is happy in that role. Well, he believes he is happy. Anyway, he feels it is a privilege to …, wait let me remember how he said it … 'Just being allowed to be part of the MCRT is more than I ever expected.' Timothy underestimates his own ability and worth. Being just a piece of equipment to the best team at NCIS is over his own expectations of himself."

"Damn it! He's not just a piece of equipment! I've watched him grow from timid and stammering rookie into one hell of an agent! He's just as important to the team as Tony or Ziva! Why does he think different!"

Ducky took a deep breath, this was going to be harder than with the other three. "Has he ever been shown that, Jethro?"

"What?"

"Has he even been shown that he ranks on the Jethro Gibbs scale of importance?"

Gibbs narrowed his eyes at his friend, he didn't like what Ducky was implying. "Do you have a point in there somewhere, Dr. Mallard?"

Ducky sighed, "Don't shoot the messenger, Jethro. Just think back over the years. When the team was split up and then reassembled, your main focus was on getting Tony and Ziva back. When you succeeded, you gave them both a hug and a strong welcome back, I don't remember such a welcome for Timothy?"

"Aw, hell Duck, I could still keep an eye on Tim." Gibbs dropped his head. "When Vance finally let me in on what was going on, I went to see what Tim had found out. I saw the way everyone treated him in Cyber-crimes, can't tell you how worried I was that he wouldn't want to come back to my team." He raised his eyes to his friend. They were brimming more emotion that Ducky had seen in a long time. "They treated him with such respect, almost reverence. When I asked him if he liked it in the basement, I actually held my breath waiting for his answer."

"Which was?" Even Ducky couldn't imaging stepping away from such respect.

Gibbs raised his head and smiled, "He said he would give it up in a minute to back on my team. That's when I knew."

"Knew what?"

"He really did belong to me. I told him that when he first joined us from Norfolk, but with how fast he was progressing, I kept expecting someone to snatch him away. But at that moment, I knew that he wasn't going anywhere. I felt like …"

"Like what, giving him a hug, maybe?" Ducky said with no mirth that would usually accompany such an admission from Gibbs.

"Yeah, well maybe?"

"But you didn't, however you did with Anthony and Ziva. Why the difference?" He could see the truth rattling around in Gibbs eyes, but that he wasn't ready to voice it yet.

Gibbs stood there silent, so Ducky threw another question at him. "Alright, how about when Ziva went undercover to trap that serial killer who liked to cut off the pinkies of his victims."

Gibbs shrugged. "Yeah, what about it?"

"As I recall, she had a near miss with a bullet. It shook her quite badly."

Gibbs nodded.

"You ordered her to go home, twice, and watched over her like a hawk until she worked it out in her own head."

"Okay …"

"Timothy's Amanda held a gun to him and demanded to know where Kia was, then ended up being killed in his arms by said assassin. I seem to remember him back at work, with nothing but orders to solve the case."

"He wasn't shot at."

"No, but neither was he undercover pretending to be interested in a target. Timothy was truly falling for the façade of Amanda. Surly, you can see the similarities of the two situations. And again, Timothy was pushed to the side, unlike his teammates." Ducky's voice was calm and even, just as if he were giving an autopsy report.

"I may not have figured Vance out yet, but damn it, I wasn't going to loose another director."

"You seem to have answers for each situation. However, the biggest question is: How would you have reacted to those same situations if it were Anthony, Ziva or Abigail instead."

Gibbs face went from confused, to angry, to resigned. He knew, the reactions would have been very different if it had been anyone else. Ducky walked forward, reached up and placed his hands on Gibbs' shoulders. "That is your answer to why Timothy believes himself nothing more than equipment."

Gibbs searched his friend's eyes for anger, but only found support. "There's more to it than that Duck."

Dr. Mallard forced himself not to smile. _Of course there is._ He released his hold on Gibbs' shoulders and placed his hands on his hips. "And what would that be?"

Gibbs had realized his answer to that question earlier that morning, on the way to the park to find his distraught agent. However, saying it out loud made him feel foolish, a feeling Gibbs distinctly didn't like. "Can't we just let it drop at I know the answer?"

Ducky shook his head. "Not this time my friend. For Timothy's sake, we need to be settled with our own feeling and actions. And, knowing you as well as I do, thinking it and saying it out loud are entirely different."

Gibbs huffed, but knew Ducky wouldn't let him slide on this. "Alright, alright. Yes, I purposely tried to keep Tim at a distance. To keep us strictly as mentor and student. He didn't need someone to step in and fill a parental role like Abby, Tony and Ziva did. Hell, those three practically have a neon sign glaring with their family issues. Tim never did. I thought he had a good family and didn't want to have to compete." He lowered his eyes. It was something he would only do around someone he completely trusted.

"Tried? Compete?" Ducky fought hard to keep any lightheartedness out of his voice.

"Yeah, tried. Damn it, Duck! I'm so proud of what he's accomplished. Watching him grow is a lot like …" he paused as a lump formed in his throat as he remembered his daughter's first piano lesson to her playing 'Hush Little Baby', winning second place in her talent show. He still played the tape they had made for him while he was away on deployment.

Ducky could read his friend like a book. The downcast eyes, the slight stiffening of his back. "A lot like watching your daughter learn new skills?"

Gibbs just nodded. "That wasn't fair to Tim. He had a family to be proud of him. He didn't need to be filling in for mine. Anyway, I kept that locked away, that way he would never have to feel as if he needed to choose between me and his real family."

"That's where the competing comes in?"

"Yeah, I don't like to lose when I compete, hell, I don't like to lose at anything, just look at our arrest record."

Ducky couldn't hide the smile any more, luckily for him, Gibbs wasn't ready to look up yet. "You know I think you have lost your touch Jethro Gibbs."

Gibbs head snapped up, "What do you mean?"

"Anyone who looks at that boy can tell that he idolizes you. That you have always been more than just a mentor to him." Ducky reached back out and place a hand on Gibbs' arm. "He wasn't trying to make you into a father, and you weren't trying to make him into a son, but it happened anyway."

Gibbs nodded. "I just didn't want to interfere with, what I thought, was a good family. Hell, part of me was a little envious of the McGees. Finding out that they thought so little of such a great son … well, let just say I hope Tim's dad and I never cross paths."

Ducky smiled even more and pulled back his hand from Gibbs. "I think you speak for all of us on that subject." He made a big show of looking at his watch. "Oh dear, look at the time. Mr. Palmer and I really must be going." He looked at Gibb's with his standard twinkle in his eyes. "Timothy is in good hands."

Gibbs smiled back and gave a firm nod.

Ducky opened the front door and leaned his head back into the house. "Mr. Palmer, do you have everything?"

"Yes, Dr. Mallard." That was Jimmy's cue that the conversation was over and it was ok to leave. "Night everyone." He walked out arms full.

Ducky made no attempt to help. He just stepped out of the way. However, the two exchange approving looks as they pasted by.

Ducky gave another quick squeeze to Gibbs' arm and left for the night.

Gibbs stood a watching his friend leave, a smile on his face. When Ducky's car was out of sight, he went back into the house, feeling better than he had all day.

XXX

Gibbs went back into his house now more determined than ever. He found three very quiet and contemplative team members. Instead of trying to talk it out, he left them alone to go get coffee started. He drank one full cup before he went back out to his living room.

DiNozzo looked at his boss wanting to ask a million questions, but didn't know which one to ask first.

Gibbs nodded at Tony knowingly and took charge of the moment. "Alright, let's go over tonight's rotation. We have the Air Force boys outside and they seem competent."

Ziva gave a questioning look. "You are willing to let someone else take lead in protecting McGee?"

"A little. Remember, we are not doing just protection, we still have to do our regular jobs and I want us to be completely focused on what we're doing so that we can nail this son-of-a-bitch and get him out of Tim's hair."

All three nodded in agreement. It was decided that Gibbs would take first shift, then Ziva, finally Tony. Abby was a little upset about not being included in the rotation, but, as Gibbs pointed out, she has no protection training, or even a weapon. She was deferred to morning duty, getting everyone up and ready for work. She wasn't thrilled, but at least she had something to do.

The night was quiet, thankfully. Gibbs was on this third time around checking in with the airmen, nothing to report. When he entered his living he found one of his team members missing. He gave a small smile and shook his head, knowing exactly where to look.

As he approached his bedroom where Tim was sleeping, he saw his missing agent leaning against the door frame, keeping silent guard. He quietly came up behind and place his hand on the figure in front of him. "Ziva, what are you doing? Your shift doesn't start for another couple of hours." He asked quietly.

"The nightmares have started." She didn't move from her position.

A small whimper from the bed made Gibbs gaze follow Ziva's to the bed. Tim was restless and gripping tightly on to the sheets.

"Something like this should have never happened to him. He does not deserve it."

Gibbs gently squeezed her shoulder. "It shouldn't have happened to either of you."

Ziva slowly turned to look at Gibbs. "I was a trained Mossad officer. I freely took the mission assigned to me. I knew all of the consequences that could happen." She shook her head. "He was just a little boy who knew nothing of what was happening to him."

"Ziva, don't discount what you went through."

"I am not. What happened to me … it was difficult … sometimes more difficult to learn how to live again and deal with the memories. However, I had help. I had a psychologist and I had my team. He, … he had no one."

Gibbs wanted to say more, but a strangled "No …" from the bed stopped him.

Ziva, turned and walked into the room, leaving Gibbs at the door.

"Please … stop … Dad … sorry …"

Ziva sat down on the bed and started stroking McGee's head. "Sshhh McGee. You are safe. I will not let anyone hurt you again."

Even in the throws of his nightmare, Tim took comfort from her words. He rolled over and wrapped his arms around Ziva's leg. "Please .."

"Sshhh. You are safe." She kept stroking his hair and uttering quiet reassurance until he fell back into a restful slumber. She looked at Gibbs. "This is where I can best be served tonight."

Gibbs nodded, he walked into the room to put a pillow behind Ziva and gave her a blanket. "Take care of him."

Ziva smiled and nodded. "Of course"

"Just don't think I'm going to let you and McGee sharing a bed become a habit." Gibbs said trying to lighten the mood.

Ziva's eyes had a gleam to them when she responded. "Oh, I do not know Gibbs. This is quite enjoyable."

A whimper silenced both of them. Ziva went back to comforting McGee like a mother would a frightened child. Gibbs looked over them both, with the change from Jethro to Ziva to hold on to, Tim no longer looked so lonely. He quietly left the room readjusting the time of rotation from three people to two.


	16. Chapter 16

Gibbs woke DiNozzo with a slight shake. He was up in an instant. "Everything okay?"

"Easy Tony. Everything's fine, just time for your shift."

DiNozzo blinked and looked at his watch. "You're late. Wait, shouldn't Ziva be waking me?"

"She had something else to take care of." Gibbs moved back from Tony and started towards his basement. He paused and looked back over his shoulder. "Just make sure you don't disturb either of them." Then he disappeared into his inner sanctum.

DiNozzo just stared in confusion. _Something else to take care of? Don't disturb either of them?_ _What the hell?_ Tony went over to the couch to rearrange the cover for Abby. He then stumbled into the kitchen to grab a cup of fresh coffee that Gibbs had started.

He stretched and popped his back, then started his rounds. He check the perimeter, checked in with each airman, then went back inside and checked each room. He heard the sound of sanding in the basement and shook his head. _Does that man ever sleep!_ With a small smile he head upstairs to peek in on his friend.

Tony reached the door and he heard a voice he wasn't expecting. "Easy McGee. I am here and you are safe."

He pushed the door open slightly and was surprised by the sight. Ziva was sitting on the bed with her back on the headboard, one hand was on Tim's shoulder, whose head happened to be in her lap. Her other hand was slowly stroking the top of McGee's head. Tony watched without saying anything or walking further into the room. Even from his vantage point, he could tell that Tim was having a rough night.

Another flash of jealousy washed through him. He backed away from the door before the emotion made him do something he would regret. As he continued his rounds, he remembered his own words to Abby earlier that day in the elevator. _'He needs Ziva. As much as I hate to admit it, she is the only one who can be close to Tim right now.' 'Ziva is the only one of us who knows what Tim is going through and what he is going to need to help deal with it.' 'As much as I want to be the one that Tim leans on, I'll never be able to completely understand like Ziva can.' 'We have to put what we want aside and put what Tim needs to the fore front.'_

It was hard to follow his own advice, but for Tim's sake he worked hard on doing just that. He felt left out and that was something that Tony DiNozzo didn't feel very often. When he did, he usually did something dumb to draw attention to himself. _Not this time. If Tim needs me in the background, then that's where I'll be … waiting._ Another memory hit from earlier, of Tim willingly grabbing onto him when Abby's hug bothered him in the director's office. _I guess I won't have to be too far in the background._

Tony smiled, refreshed his coffee, and started his patrol pattern again.

XXXX

As Tim's alarm went off in the morning, he became aware of two things. First was the furry weight lying against his back and second was the fact that he was apparently sleeping on someone's lap.

He reached over to stop the alarm, and pulled back to see just exactly who was being a pillow for him. He was shocked to see Ziva looking at him with clear brown eyes. "Good morning McGee."

"Ziva? What … are you doing here?" He sat back on his legs, reached behind him and started petting Jethro.

"This was a more comfortable sleeping arrangement than downstairs." She smiled secretively. She knew McGee was going to feel strange about waking up to her in the same bed, so she was trying to put him at ease.

He lifted his eyebrow. He looked so much like Gibbs, that Ziva broke into a full smile. "What? You do not like waking up with me in your bed?"

His ears turned bright red. "No … I mean yes … I just never thought about you and me in bed …" Ziva gave him a disapproving look. "… I have, but not like … I mean …" Tim gave up and slumped his head and shoulders.

_Always the gentleman._ Ziva took pity on him. She reached out and place a hand on his arm. "You needed some … help to get through the night."

McGee sighed. "Was I that loud? I hope I didn't wake the whole house."

"It did not get that far. I knew you would be having dreams about what happened, so I was here before it could get out of hand."

"How did you know?" McGee was still petting Jethro and carefully watching the patterns on the blanket.

"I went through the same when I came home from Somalia."

McGee's head snapped up. "Oh god, Ziva! I didn't think about …" He reached out and grabbed her hand. "I'm sorry, this has to be bringing up a lot of bad memories for you." He dropped his gaze again and stared at their hands. "I'll work on keeping this to myself. You shouldn't be reminded of that place because of my past."

Ziva scowled. She took her hand off Tim's arm and slipped out of his grasp. She place both hand on his cheeks and lifted his face to hers. "You listen to me Timothy McGee." She looked him straight in his eyes with the intensity of willing him to understand. "You do no need to worry about what I am going through. I am glad that I can finally return all the support you have given to me over the years. This may not have been the circumstances that I would have wished, but I am here for you, whatever you need."

Tim's expressive green eyes showed so much emotion, it was impossible to discern one from another. "I feel like such a burden. This happened so far in the past, I'm an adult now, I shouldn't be reacting this way! What's wrong with me?"

"McGee … Tim … there is nothing wrong with you. You are having to relive an incident that you have long ago locked away. You will go through many emotions, we all understand and expect it. Never …" she gave a firm shake to his face "… think that you are a burden. We are your team."

"But …"

"No! You have stood by each one of us so effortlessly and without much thanks. It is okay to lean on us for once."

He looked at her with such doubt, it actually hurt her heart. "Do you believe that you cannot?"

"It's not that it Ziva. It's just …" McGee couldn't take his eyes off of hers.

"Just that you feel that you are a tool to be used."

"Yeah. That's where I fit in the team, Ziva. Now, …'

She gave him another firm shake. "Now we have the chance to show you that you are more than that. You are important to us."

"Ziva, I know I am, but ..."

"You are important to us as an agent, a team member, and a friend."

Tim's green eyes searched Ziva's brown ones for the truth of her statement. He always wanted to think that he meant more to the team, but he was too afraid to hope. It was better to resign himself to a place in the background and feel needed than to push for more and lose it all.

Ziva knew McGee was looking for the conviction of her words. Her eyes were strong and steady. She wanted him to believe her right now, more than anything. For one of the few times in her life, she let her emotions to fully show.

A tear slid down McGee's face, which Ziva wiped away with her thumb. "Really, Ziva? The team means so much to me. I don't want to do anything to mess that up."

"You could not. Not ever. We will always stand beside you. I will always be there to support you, as your partner and as your friend."

More tears came. Tim wanted to stop them, but couldn't. He hated feeling so weak, regardless of what any of the team said.

Ziva saw McGee's struggle. Without removing her hands, she scooted closer to him, then she brought his face to her shoulder and held him close. "It is alright McGee. Letting go does not mean you are weak or that we will think any less of you. One of your American authors said, 'There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness but of power. They are messengers of overwhelming grief and of unspeakable love.'"

Tim placed his hands on either side of Ziva and gripped the cover hard enough to turn his knuckles white. Ziva's words and actions both comforted and confused him.

She said nothing more. She knew Tim was still holding back, but realized it would take time for him to truly believe everything the rest of the team was trying to show him. Ziva felt sad that they had taken him for granted so much that he could not understand how much he meant to them all.

After a few minutes, Tim composed himself. He pulled back from Ziva. "Washington Irving."

"What?" Ziva was confused.

"The American author."

She gave Tim a genuine smile.

A knock came from the other side of the door. "Good morning you two! This is your thirty minute warning!" Abby's chipper voice floated through.

Ziva turned her head towards the door and answered. "Thank you, Abby! We will be down."

She turned back to McGee. "You ready."

He gave a shaky smile. "I need to shower, I'll be quick."

Ziva gave a mischievous smile. "Do you wish for me to provide protection while you are in the shower?"

This time, McGee's whole face turned red. "What would you be protecting me from?"

Ziva was ready for some levity. "There are many dangers. You could cut yourself while shaving, or you could dry off too hard and get a brush burn, or you could get washed down the drain."

That brought a smile to McGee's face. It reminded him of when he would tease Sarah about getting washed away. "Don't worry Ziva, I'll be careful." He acted on reflex, he reached out and hugged her. He let go quickly and got his clothes and toiletries together.

Ziva was glad to see the smile on his face. The hug surprised her, but it was a welcomed surprise. She decided to add one last jest, to set the day off right. "You are sure that you do not wish for me to watch you shower?"

McGee smiled and shook his head. "No. I'll be fine. Besides …" he turned his head towards her "… I don't think you want to see me naked."

Bingo! "Oh, I do not know McGee. You have been taking care of yourself lately. I have been wondering what lies underneath your clothing."

Tim turned bright red from the top of his forehead all the way down his neck. He opened and closed his mouth a couple of times trying to think of a come back. He ended up shaking his head. "I'm not even going to go there." He quickly went into the bathroom before Ziva could say something else.

Ziva smiled at the closed bathroom door. She waited until she heard the water running before turning to the bedroom door, her smile fading. "You may come in now, Abby."

A sheepish Abby pushed open the door. "How did you know I was there?"

Ziva gave her an incredulous look.

"Oh, right. Ninja senses." Abby paused and wrung her hands. "I just … how is he?" She inclined her head towards the bathroom door.

"Adjusting."

"It is really that hard for him to believe that we care about him?"

"It is more than just that."

Abby started to say something, but stopped. She shook her head. "I'll be downstairs." She walked away a bit dejected, but to her credit, she didn't harp about it. She closed the door behind her.

Once Abby left, and the door was closed, Ziva let out a sigh. _Well, at least she is trying._ She returned her focus back to the bathroom door. _We are all trying. Are any of us going to be strong enough to be what McGee needs?_ She reached over and gave Jethro a good head scratching. "What do you think? Do we deserve to be called McGee's friends?"

Jethro gave a small cock to his head.

"Yes, I think we have much to prove as well."

She continued to pet Jethro while waiting for McGee to finish his shower.

XXXX

McGee let the hot water cascade over him. It was the hottest shower he had taken since the day the 'incident' happened. The burning water actually felt good for once, numb is what he was going for.

_Damn it, damn it, damn it! I wasn't going to lose control today! I mean, for Ziva to … god! I'm so pathetic! I didn't fall apart like this when I was little. What's different?_

Tim didn't have to think hard about it, he knew the answer, he knew it last night. He wasn't in the background. Even his Dad allowed him to disappear, it made him happy when Tim was invisible.

_No matter what, this isn't about me. It's about the murder victims, not me. It's about finding the perp, not me. It's about find justice for the families, not me. Not me, not me … not me._

Tim continued his mantra until he rejoined Ziva in the bedroom.


	17. Chapter 17

Hey all - I'm not going to be able to get on tomorrow to post, so I decided to post the next chapter now. (It's also a little longer, so hopefully doubly good!) I will be back on Sunday.  
>Thank you to everyone who is reading &amp; reviewing! Enjoy!<p>

I didn't post a disclaimer on the last chapter, so this is for both 16 & 17 - I do not own NCIS or its characters, just having some fun!

* * *

><p>Ziva could tell the difference in McGee as soon as he came back into Gibb's room. She sighed to herself. <em>Is he never going to let us in?<em> She said nothing.

"I don't think I used all of the hot water, if you want to shower." McGee said off handedly to Ziva while he packed his clothes away.

He sounded strained, as though he was trying to remember how to be himself. _He has withdrawn again._ "No, I did not bring anything with me. I will wait until we get to the yard. I have spare."

"Okay, we better head down before Tony gets any ideas."

"Oh, what kind of ideas?" Ziva tried to draw McGee out.

However, he just shrugged. "It's Tony, who knows how his mind works."

She was angry and hurt and hid it well. _Nothing we do is making a difference. Why?_ On the outside she said, "You are right. Shall we go?"

Tim nodded and they descended the stairs together.

XXXX

Tony was ready when they came down. "Well you two, it's about time. I was starting to wonder what was going on up there." He wagged his eyebrows suggestively.

Ziva was ready to play, but before she could say anything, Tim beat her to it. "Oh please, get your mind out of the gutter Tony. Ziva's too professional."

Tony smiled hesitantly. Something about the way Tim was saying it felt wrong. Then he saw a hurt look cross Ziva's face. However, she followed McGee's lead. "That is correct Tony, I know how to conduct myself."

"What's that supposed to mean? Are you saying I can't be professional."

McGee strode past him, "Do you even know the meaning of the word?"

"Of course I do McDictionary! Let see, it means to be stuffy, a robot, a stick in the mud …"

"Yeah, that's what I thought." Tim continued into the kitchen.

Tony's smile fell. He turned back to Ziva, confused. He walked over to her. "What did you do to him?"

Ziva shot him an angry look. "I did nothing. I let him know that we are there for him as a team. Just like he has always been for us, but he seems to have withdrawn instead. I do not understand."

"It's for us."

"What?"

"McGee caught everything that was going on last night. He is trying to be normal because it will be easier on us. Damn it!" He slammed his fist on the railing.

Abby leaned her head out. "Hey, you two, coming for breakfast?"

Tony calmed himself. "Yeah, sure Abs."

All three shared a concerned look and went into the kitchen.

XXXX

Breakfast was strained. The jokes, barbs, jabs and retorts where there, but the levity was missing. Everyone could easily tell how hard McGee was trying to maintain normalcy and keep attention off himself.

Gibbs caught Ziva's eye. She gave a small shake to her head. Gibbs sighed to himself. He remembered Tim's mumbled words from last night. He came the same realization DiNozzo had, Tim was doing this for their sakes. Because he didn't matter.

Gibbs hid a fiercely determined face behind his coffee mug. Already plotting ways to change the mind of his youngest agent.

XXXX

The time came to leave for the office. Everyone was herded out to the cars, but Tim lagged behind, to let Jethro out one last time. As he was watching his dog, his phone rang.

Tim pulled it out of his pocket and looked at the caller id, an unknown number. Ever since Amanda, he had been very careful who he gave his new number. He let it go to voicemail.

Jethro bounded up to him. Tim absent mindedly reached out and petted his dog. "That's the, what, fourth or fifth unknown number. I might have to have my number changed again."

Jethro sat down and whimpered a little. Tim squatted down to be eye level with his dog. "I'm okay boy. Didn't I tell you that I would get them back to normal?" Tim scratched behind the dog's ears. Jethro gave him a big doggie kiss. Tim laughed, "Hey!"

Gibbs came back through his house to get his lagging agent. He smiled a little watching Tim with Jethro. "Come on McGee! You're going to make us late."

"Coming, Boss!" McGee guided his dog back into the house. He rested his hand on the dog's head and looked down to him. "Be a good boy, okay?"

Jethro gave a 'woof' and wagged his tail.

McGee looked up to his boss and nodded.

Gibbs held out his hand to allow McGee to go first. The slight smile he had fell as he watched his agent go through his front door. He looked at the dog, shook his head, then followed his agent out.

XXXX

Tim got to ride shot gun. He gave a confused look as he got into the car, he never was allowed to ride shot gun if either Tony or Ziva was around. He just shrugged and got in.

The ride in was just like breakfast.

For McGee, everything was as it should be. Everything felt normal and he was ready to focus on the case, not himself. He even forgot about his security detail following closely behind, until he walked into the bullpen. Roger was there, ready to take over for the night protection. Tim paused as he came out of the elevator, all of it coming back to him.

A firm but gentle hand on his back got him moving again. "Roger." Tim nodded has he walked past.

"Agent McGee." Roger nodded back and then went to confer with detail he was relieving.

Tim sat down at his desk and got started on compiling the results of his over night search.

Gibbs had been the one who placed a hand on Tim's back, wanting to show support. He hoped Tim understood. He looked around at his team. "Okay everyone, we know what we need to do. Let's get to it."

Tony and Ziva nodded. Tony went to his desk, and this time, Ziva went to hers. However, Abby lingered. "Gibbs?"

He came over and gave her a side kiss to her cheek and then nodded to her.

"Right." She gave a weak smile and headed to her lab.

Gibbs gave a soft sigh and looked around. Everyone was working, it was a quiet moment, but it didn't feel right. His gut was telling him, this was the calm before the storm. He didn't like it. Tim had been through more than enough already, he just wanted to get his hands on this s.o.b. and … Well, he wouldn't get to do what he wanted, but at least he could get this guy away from Tim.

Gibbs walked over to the airmen. He recognized Airman Williams from the day before, but the other, Airman Settie, had been replaced. Gibbs frowned, he didn't want a revolving door of airmen. If they were going to be handling Tim's protection, then a smaller group would be best. Gibbs nodded to the new man. "Why the change?"

Roger answered. "Airman Settie didn't feel comfortable staying in my command. This is Airman Ryan Masterson. He is fully briefed and has agreed to stay on through the duration of the investigation. There will be no more personnel changes." Roger dismissed the other three airmen with a nod.

Gibbs looked at airman Williams. "You have no problem staying on?"

Williams shifted his eyes towards Roger, who gave him a nod, giving permission to speak freely. "We all have things in our past that we are not proud of and Sergeant Ferris has stuck by me both personally and professionally. I have been briefed on what I missed when I followed your man. I am not saying that I approve of his actions back then, but that was back then. I know a different person, and I am loyal to the person I know."

Gibbs narrowed his eyes. "There's more to it."

Williams looked over to McGee who was quietly working, not looking at anything past his computer. "He's a good man. There are so many other roads that he could have gone down, but he chose to protect." Williams looked at his superior and then at Gibbs. "He could have refused any involvement, instead he is trying to help find the perp, no matter what he is going through." He looked back over to McGee, "He's stronger than he gives himself credit."

Gibbs gave a slight smile and just nodded. Without even realizing it, McGee had impressed those around him. Gibbs' pride in his youngest agent swelled. He went to his desk and decided it was time to call in some favors.

XXXX

The morning came and went without much notice. DiNozzo had been on the phone talking with local LEO's from the area Mark Siebel had last been seen. Ziva was doing the same, looking for Nathaniel Enedy. McGee was looking for any type of paper trail for either one of his past tormentors.

Gibbs was getting ready to call lunch when a strangled "No!" came from McGee's desk. Everyone turned to look at him, even the airmen.

"Damn it! No! No! NO!" Tim slammed his fists down on either side of his keyboard and hung his head. "Son-of-a-bitch!"

Team Gibbs exchanged concerned looks. Gibbs got up, walked over to McGee and knelt down in front him so that he could look at Tim at eye level. "What is it Tim?" Gibbs voice full of concern.

Tim just shook his head.

"Come on, talk to us."

McGee lifted his head, guilt filled his green eyes as he met concerned blue ones. "I … I was focusing on finding Nate and Mark so … so all other searches fell into the back ground." He shook his head at himself.

"Ok, that sound reasonable."

"With the other searches, I was trying to find anything that would connect the victims, other than the obvious. I thought if I could figure out how these guys were picked …"

"You found something." Gibbs wondered what piece of information would have upset his agent this much.

McGee nodded reached over to his keyboard and brought some information up on the big screen. "There is one phone number that had been dialed from each of their cell phones around T.O.D." Tim highlighted the number and brought it to the forefront. "Mine. He called me before he killed them boss. I could have stopped him! I could have …"

Gibbs reached out with both hands and grabbed McGee's shoulders. "You listen to me! This is NOT your fault. Do you hear me? For all you know, he was calling you after they were dead to torment you."

Tim shook his head. "Boss, I … Oh, no!" McGee's eyes went wide and filled with fear.

"What?"

"I got a call this morning from an unknown number. What if …" McGee pulled out of Gibbs' hold. He pulled out his cell phone and looked up the odd number and began a computer search. He turned pale at the results. "It belongs to a Timothy Everton." With shaking hands, he pin pointed the location of the phone. "Found it." He brought up the location on the big screen, right in the middle of Rock Creek Park.

Gibbs stood and put a hand on McGee's shoulder. He looked around to all those watching. "Alright, DiNozzo and Staff Sergeant Ferris, you're with me. Ziva …" He nudged his head towards McGee. Ziva nodded with understanding.

Gibbs squeezed McGee's shoulder. Tim wouldn't look at him, he went back to his computer, looking for all information about the newest possible victim.

Gibbs sighed. This was going to add complications with helping Tim. But right now, the focus had to be on the possible victim. Gibbs walked to the elevator, two men following.

XXXX

When the elevator door closed Ziva went over to Tim. He was still shaking and trying very hard to work. Ziva mimicked Gibbs as she squatted down next to his chair. "This is not your fault, McGee."

"How many more, Ziva.?"

Ziva crinkled her eyebrows in confusion. "How many more, what?"

"How many more are going to die because of me?"

"McGee …"

Tim shook his head, he turned to look at Ziva. "The two men who died because of my book, Michelle Lee …"

"Agent Lee?"

"It was my job to find the mole, Ziva. That's why Vance split up our team. Because I didn't figure it out in time it cost three men their lives … it cost Michelle hers … it almost cost you yours."

"McGee …"

"And then there's Pacci … and Benedict … and Erin …"

Ziva had been there for Benedict, had heard about Erin Kendall, but Pacci … she wasn't familiar with that name. The name he said next took her breath away.

"… Kate …"

Without thinking, Ziva grabbed McGee's face, very similarly to how she did that morning, but with much more force. "Ari killed Agent Todd. He did, not you!"

Tim was shaking and recoiled from the anger in Ziva's voice. "He was aiming at me first, Ziva. If I wouldn't have moved … if I wouldn't have hidden behind the car, it would have been me."

Ziva felt sick. She thought she knew everything that had happened with Ari's break from Mossad, but she never knew that Tim was his first target. To never have known Tim, to have never been given the gift of his friendship, to never … "McGee, even if Ari would have killed you, he may have still targeted Agent Todd."

"Guess we'll never know. You would have liked Kate. I think you two would have been good friends. It would have been fun to watch the two of you gang up on Tony." McGee gave a wistful smile, as if he had been picturing such an occurrence for log time.

"No disrespect to the dead, but YOU are my good friend. _You _were the first to accept me on the team, _you _were the one who helped me find a place to live, _you _were the one who showed me all the shortcuts around town, _you _were the one to help with my English … and so much more. **You**. I am so thankful for your friendship. My life would have been lacking if I had never met you."

"But, …"

"No!" She shook him hard, the anger returning. _Why does he carry all of this guilt. None of this is his fault! Not in the past and not now. Why does he feel that it is?_ "I value you and your friendship. I am very glad that my brother did not kill you."

"You might be the only one."

"What?"

"Nothing. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that. It wasn't fair." Tim blushed with his admission. "I should get back to work." Tim tried to pull out of Ziva's grip, but she held on tight.

"I want to know what you mean." Ziva was getting more angry. There was something hidden here and she didn't like it.

"It's nothing. Really. I should …"

"You will tell me what you mean McGee." Her intense, angry brown eyes drilled into his sad, hurt green ones.

McGee swallowed hard. "After … when we came back here and realized I was targeted first, they … Gibbs and Tony … said I owed the terrorist that shot at me a thanks. If it wasn't for him shooting at me, I wouldn't have moved and I would be dead. The look on their faces … I know they were hurting because of Kate, but … I knew they wanted to add '… and Kate would still be alive.' Their faces … especially Tony …" Tim closed his eyes at the remembered hurt.

"Kate was part of the team for years, I was still so new. No one would have been upset if it was me that … Gibbs and Tony were so close to Kate." He opened his eyes, locking on to Ziva's. "You really would have liked her."

Ziva was so angry that she could kill someone. How could they have ever said … ever implied … "You listen to me." She gripped even harder on his face. "I do not care what they said. You, Timothy McGee, are a good person. None of what you mentioned is your fault. NONE of it! You have saved many people."

"Yeah, name one."

"You saved me."

"All I did was roll around on the ground."

"Do not ever disregard you contribution to my rescue."

"But Tony said …"

"I do not care what Tony has said! What you did meant, means, so much to me! If I have to I will pound that into you and them."

"Ziva, I … I'm sorry. I didn't mean to turn you against the them. Please try to see it from their side."

"No McGee. I will not tolerate anyone devaluing your life, not even the team. I can understand the emotions of losing a team member, but I will NOT understand making you to blame for it."

"Ziva …"

She shook him again but said nothing. Again, as she had done earlier that day, she let him see all of her emotions through her eyes.

McGee just stared and stared. He was getting lost in Ziva's emotions. He could feel, really feel her understanding and loyalty. He closed his eyes again, overwhelmed. "Thank you Ziva." He breathed out. Tim opened his eyes and brought his hands to lay on hers, still holding on to his face. "Really, thank you."

Ziva smiled. She knew that McGee finally understood how she felt. As she stood, Ziva didn't remove her hands yet. Instead she leaned in and kissed his forehead. She smiled again and slid behind him to take up her same spot from yesterday.

Tim nodded to himself and got back to searching, feeling more settled and level minded than he had since this nightmare began.


	18. Chapter 18

Wow, you guys really liked Ziva in the last chapter! She has another big moment coming, but for now, we are going to learn more about Roger. Hope you enjoy!

Disclaimer: (wow, do we really have to do this for each chapter?) I do not own any part of NCIS. The characters created for the story are mine though.

* * *

><p>Staff Sergeant Ferris was updating his commanding officer as the three barreled to the location on the GPS. Gibbs was watching him very closely through the rear view mirror.<p>

When he closed his phone, Roger updated the NCIS agents. "My CO is contacting the local LEO's letting them know that I am to take over jurisdiction."

Gibbs frowned, he wanted jurisdiction, but since his only connection to the case was a potential target, he knew he didn't have much to stand on. He would take what he could get and so far the Air Force was being very gracious about NCIS's involvement.

"Okay, then we will have immediate access to the scene?"

"Yes sir."

Gibbs glanced at Tony. He could tell from the look on his senior agent's face, that he felt the same way about not having the lead on this case. Tony decided to direct his frustration elsewhere. He turned around in his seat to face Roger. "So why are you doing this?"

"Sir?"

"Why are you coming to Tim's rescue. Most bullies don't even remember the names of those they've tormented. Why did Tim's stick with you?"

"DiNozzo …"

Tony glanced at his Boss, "No. I want to know." He focused back on Roger. "During all of this, you have never said why Tim is so important to you. Are you trying to earn his forgiveness? Are you in a twelve step program? What?"

Roger closed his eyes briefly. When he reopened them, he looked directly into DiNozzo's eyes. "After the pit, we all kind of broke apart. Theodore went crazy, attacked his dad, ended up in a mental hospital for awhile. Nate's and Greg's family moved. Mark and I stopped hanging out together. After seeing something like that, it affects you. All the sudden nothing makes sense. Even if the others had stayed, I don't think we could have hung out any more."

Roger paused. He didn't really want to talk about this. He had come to peace with himself along time ago, right now he wanted Tim to be his focus. However, he could tell that Tim's teammates needed to know more.

"I went from an outgoing social kid, to withdrawn and sullen. My parents got worried and sent me to a psychologist."

"Aw, poor thing." Tony hissed.

"DiNozzo."

Roger met Gibbs' gaze in the rearview mirror. "No sir. He's right." He brought his focus back to Tony. "You wanted to know my reasons."

"So that's why? You're following your shrink's advice."

Roger shook his head. "At first I couldn't even talk to my therapist about what happened. Didn't feel I had a right to. During summer break I didn't get better. I think my parents were ready to chalk it up to a phase, but the therapist thought differently, so I kept going, kept saying nothing."

"By the beginning of the next school year, my parents thought I needed a change of scenery, so they sent me to live with my cousin … out in Bethesda."

"What! No way! You didn't …"

"No sir, Agent DiNozzo. Ti … Agent McGee never knew I was there."

"Okay, so where is this story heading?"

"Do you know that Bethesda is one of the most affluent and highly educated locales in the country?"

Tony gave a confused glance to his Boss, who just shrugged. Tony looked back to Sergeant Ferris. "So …"

"My cousin … well, it took him a little longer to grasp some things. He was in no way stupid, he just learned differently. Because of it, he was the one being bullied by the smart kids. He went through tutors because no one really wanted to take the time with him, until …"

"You're kidding, right?"

"No sir."

~Flashback~

Roger closed the book he had been trying to study. This home schooling wasn't everything it was cracked-up to be. A knock at his door brought him out of his thoughts. "Come in."

His cousin, Matt, entered the room. Matt was just a year older than Roger, his hair was darker, but they had the same hazel eyes. They looked more like brothers than cousins. "Are you coming down to met him?"

Roger smiled, this new tutor really meant a lot to Matt. "Maybe. You guys friends?"

"I think we are, but …"

Roger frowned, "What, let me guess, he doesn't want his friends knowing the two of you are hanging out."

Matt shook his head. "No, more the other way around, but I make sure I sit with him at lunch everyday."

"I'm sure his other friends love that." Roger smirked.

"That's just it. He doesn't have any. He gave them up for me."

"What do you mean Matty."

"I thought I told you. It happened at the beginning of the school year. All the smart kids were picking on me and asked him to join in. He said no. They told him if he didn't he couldn't be friends with them any more. He told them he didn't want friends like them any way. After that, he was always alone." Matt shook his head.

"He sounds cool."

"The best! You'd really like him!"

Roger smiled again. "Alright, when I get done with this stuff, I'll be down."

"Great!" Matt practically bounced out of the room.

Roger just shook his head. He knew his cousin had been having trouble at this school. His family had been talking about moving out to Alameda. That was until this new guy came to Matt's school. Everything had turned around for Matt. Well, if his cousin could bring his grades up, he could too. Roger turned back to his book and started studying again.

An hour later, his homework was complete, and his head was thumping. He heard the doorbell. _That must mean Matt's tutor is here._ Roger stretched and headed to the bathroom. He was in the hallway when the voices he heard from below stopped him.

"Where'd you get that shiner, Timmy?"

"It's n-n-nothing. I-I'm used to it."

"I don't care if you're used to it. I want to know who did this to you."

"N-no Matt, I-I don't want you g-getting in t-trouble because of me."

"That's what friends do."

"T-thanks. L-let's just get s-s-started, ok?"

Roger was frozen. _No way! It couldn't be!_ He waited until he heard the two boys head into the kitchen. Then he slipped downstairs and stood outside the kitchen door.

"If you just tell me who did this to you, I'll take care of it for you." Roger could hear the freezer door open. He guessed Matt was getting something for Tim's eye.

"N-no Matt."

A sigh. "It wasn't your old man was it."

"No."

"Timmy …"

"H-honest, Matt. C-can we j-just drop it? P-please?"

"Alright, alright. I don't know why you won't let me knock a couple of heads together for you."

"B-because it won't h-help either of us. You k-know that."

"It's gotten worse lately."

"It's because of m-m-my award."

"Yeah. All those brainiacs thought they were going to get the Presidential Award."

A nervous laugh. "I-if they want it s-so bad, t-they can have it."

"No Timmy. You deserve that award. You're not only the smartest person I know, but the bravest."

Another nervous laugh. "Me …b-brave. I-I don't think so."

"Of course you are! The way you've stood up to all the smart kids! You could have joined in with their bullying."

"B-bullying is wrong. W-w-whether it's j-jocks or g-geeks."

"Yeah, but I know you were bullied in your old school. I wouldn't have blamed you if you wanted revenge."

"F-for what? Y-you didn't b-bully me. W-Why would I take that out on y-you?"

"You're a good friend Timmy." The sounds of a cupboard opening and glasses being taken down, the refrigerator opening then closing, finally the sound of something being poured. "I used to beg my parents not to send me to school. It's hard being a dummy in a school full of geniuses."

"Y-your not dumb, Matt. Y-you just learn d-differently."

"That's what my cousin says."

"S-sounds like a s-smart guy."

"Oh, he is! I want you to met him. He's staying with us for awhile." There was the sound of sneakers on linoleum, coming towards the kitchen door.

Roger backed away and hid around the corner.

The kitchen door opened and Matt came half-way out. "Hey! Roger! My tutor's here!"

Silence.

"Roger!"

"R-r-roger?" A squeaked panicked voice came from the inside the kitchen.

Matt turned his head back over his shoulder. "Yeah. Roger Ferris. He's from Alameda. Hey! Isn't that where you came from? Did you know him?"

Roger held his breath in his hiding place. Matt and Roger we always close, if he found out that he used to bully his new friend … that Roger was no better than the people who bullied him …

"N-n-n-no. I d-didn't k-know h-him."

Matt turned back into the kitchen, the door closing behind him. Roger crept back over to keep eavesdropping.

"Really? Well you are a year ahead of him. You would have like him Tim, I'm sure if he knew you were being bullied, he would have stood up for you."

"I-I'm s-s-sure." Came a deadpan response.

"What's wrong?"

"N-nothing. A-are you r-ready?"

"You sure?"

"Y-yeah, Matt, I'm s-sure."

"Okay, where were we?"

Roger listed for hours while Tim patiently explained Algebra, English, and Modern History. The stutter almost completely disappeared. He could hear how much fun Tim made the learning and the joy when a concept click for Matt.

Roger's head was spinning. _Why didn't Tim out me? He could have turned Matt against me. Why didn't he? Maybe he thought Matt wouldn't believe him? Or that he'd lose Matt as a friend? Or …_ His thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the tutoring session coming to an end, books being closed and chairs being pushed back.

"That was awesome Timmy! I'll ace this next test! You should be a teacher!"

"T-thanks, but I have s-something else in m-mind."

"What?"

"Y-you'd laugh."

"No way! I'd never laugh at you."

"I … I w-want to protect p-people. M-maybe stop s-someone from being b-bullied like we a-are."

"Whoa! That's cool. You mean like a cop!"

"W-well, I'm n-never going to be in a-any part of the m-military, b-but I t-think there's s-still s-some way I can h-help."

"If anyone can, you can!"

"Y-you think so?"

"I know so!"

Roger could hear them coming towards the kitchen door, so he hid again. He secretly watched as Matt escorted Tim to the main door. "Do you want me to walk you home?"

Tim shook his head.

"Are you sure? 'Cause I don't mind."

"It's o-okay Matt. Y-you have some b-big tests c-coming up, a-another fight is the l-last thing you need."

Matt threw his arm around Tim's shoulders. "Hey! I'll have you know that I haven't been in a fight for almost two weeks!"

Tim actually smiled. "Then l-let's make that a-almost t-three."

Matt gave a hearty laugh. "You're a good friend Timmy. Just remember that goes both ways. Okay?"

Tim nodded.

"Anyway, maybe next time you can met my cousin. I think you'd really like him."

A shadow crossed Tim's face. "S-s-sure M-m-matt."

Matt gave him a pat on the back, then closed the door behind him. He shook his head and headed upstairs. "Hey Roger! Hey you missed …"

His voice trailed off as he went down the hallway trying to find his cousin.

Roger went to the window next to the door to watch Tim and was again surprised. Tim was crouched down behind the bushes that lined the front yard, arms wrapped tightly around himself, rocking and shaking. Roger just watched as Tim wiped tears from his eyes and then straightened himself.

He walked down the sidewalk, looking so very alone.

~End Flashback~

"Tim, uh, Agent McGee, had skipped another grade. So, since my cousin was older, they ended up in the same class. I think my cousin was watching out for him, since Matt was three years older."

"I made sure to keep hidden or leave every time Tim came over to tutor. Matt's grades shot up, Tim never held it against my cousin that he just happened to be related to me. They ended up moving a year latter. It was really hard on him moving away from Tim, but I know they kept in touch. Tim always gave him any help he needed."

Roger paused, his emotions threatening to overwhelm him. He looked again at Gibbs' eyes in the rear-view, then back at Tony. "Timothy McGee is a very rare man. He could have joined in bullying my cousin and others to fit in, to get revenge, but instead, he didn't stand for it, keeping to his principles, preferring to walk alone than to give in to peer pressure or revenge. He could have hidden himself away from the world, but instead he wanted to help. After all that had been done to him, he still wanted to help people."

Roger shook his head. "He is the best person I know. Made it hurt even more knowing what I had allowed to happen to him. When I went back to home, I finally told my therapist what had happened. He told me the only way I could ever make reparations was to follow in Tim's foot steps."

This time he looked at Gibbs only. "I went into the military, not because of my Father, but because of Tim. I wanted to protect people, like I should have been all along. Like Tim would be doing."

He turned back to DiNozzo. "Matt is now a successful businessman, who takes the time to tutor kids and has established outreach programs to help the victims of bullying. It's all because of Tim."

"That is why I am here. Not because I am looking for forgiveness, not because of anything I can gain for myself. But because a good man is in danger. A good man who has and will change lives. I will do anything to protect him from harm. Anything."

Tony stared a moment at Roger, then nodded and turned back around in his seat. He took a moment to look at Gibbs, who had a slight smile and nodded back at Tony.

All three were silent on the rest of the ride. Each lost in their own thoughts about one Timothy McGee.


	19. Chapter 19

I have fallen behind again on responding to reviews, I'm sorry. I thank each and every one of you, your reviews mean a lot to me!  
>For you Ziva fans, I think you will really like this chapter (let me know!).<p>

On with the show, uh, story. (The new show will be tomorrow when the new season starts! YEA!) Disclaimer: The NCIS characters do not belong to me, nor am I making any money off of them.

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><p>Hours later, DiNozzo and Sergeant Ferris came back into the bullpen. Gibbs had gone down to Abby's lab to give her the physical evidence himself, knowing she would be upset again.<p>

As Tony walked to his desk he could feel McGee watching him. He looked up and met distressed green eyes. He knew what Tim was silently asking. "It was definitely our prep. Same M.O., the assault, the kill weapon, the name …"

McGee looked at Roger. "What was the 'window dressing' this time?"

Roger sighed. "He was stoned after he was killed."

Tim's hand unconsciously went to his right temple, tracing a small scar.

_Another scar._ For some reason, this infuriated Tony. He took it out on the one person who always got the brunt of his anger. "Tim! How many more of these scars do you have!"

McGee jumped at the sound of Tony's voice. He looked at the senior field agent and shrugged. "Lots. I've forgotten about them over the years."

This made Tony even angrier. He stormed over to McGee's desk and towered above him. "Well I suggest you start remembering. We need to get a head of this guy, McGee! You know him better than anyone! You know what to expect next!"

Ziva and Roger were glaring at DiNozzo. Not understanding why he was making this all Tim's responsibility and, even at this moment, Tony himself didn't understand why he was so mad.

McGee, on the other hand, took Tony's anger as a sign that he had figured out this whole mess was his fault. He brought his hands down to his lap and his gaze followed, no longer able to keep looking at DiNozzo. "Y-you're right Tony. I-I'll g-get it together. S-sorry."

Tim clenched his hands into fists and closed his eyes to calm himself. When he reopened his eyes, he nodded to himself, opened a new window, and started typing every painful and scar filled memory of his childhood.

DiNozzo watched McGee's demeanor, the shoulder's slumped, the look of total defeat, and when he heard McGee stutter, he knew he pushed way to far. His own anger deflated and he was embarrassed by his out burst. _Damn it DiNozzo! Stuck your foot in you mouth big time!_

"Hey …" he reached out to grab McGee's shoulder, but instead found his wrist in a death grip. He looked at Ziva who, if looks could kill, he would be dead … twice. Tony started to say something, but Ziva pushed on his arm, making him backup.

Ziva never broke eye contact with Tony. He tried to say something again, but wisely decided against it. He had never seen Ziva so furious. He looked over her head to McGee, who was typing away, not looking at anyone.

Tony sighed, yup, he'd really done it this time. He looked back at Ziva, but for once didn't know what to say.

Ziva let go of his wrist and grabbed his arm instead. She pulled him out of the bullpen towards the break room. Any agent who got in their way, quickly moved so as not be killed by the obviously steaming former Mossad officer.

When they reached the break room, Ziva practically threw DiNozzo in. She gave a quick look to make sure they were alone. "Do not _**ever**_ do that again.", she hissed. "None of this is his fault and I will not let anyone make him feel otherwise."

Tony was rubbing his arm where she had grabbed him. "You're right. I know, sorry." He hoped his admission would deflate Ziva's anger. He hoped in vain.

Ziva studied him a moment before she let him have the full force of her fury. "I know you wish that McGee were not around. That he has never measured up to the 'Tony DiNozzo' scale of machismo. But he is **my** friend and a good agent, regardless of what you or Gibbs may think. I will not let either of you add any more guilt to what he is already carrying."

Ziva didn't raise her voice, but the venom she carried in it, made it clear how she felt. "You will leave him alone." She took a step towards Tony, full of threat and violence. She let him read her intentions and then turned away. She went over to the vending machine to get something for Tim. He had not eaten much at breakfast and lunch was skipped because of this new victim. She wanted something that would make him smile. When she spotted the Nutter Butters she knew she had her winner and started digging in her pockets for the change needed.

Tony, however was stunned. "What the hell are you talking about Ziva?"

Ziva didn't turn around to look at him. "Being who you are, I guess it makes sense."

"What do you mean? Please stop talking in riddles."

"Who would want a bumbling Probie around when you could have had two women on your team? I am sure that would have pounded up your ego, no?"

Tony didn't even bother to correct her mistake, as he was getting angry again. "Ziva …"

She found enough change and put it in the machine. As she was making her selection, she noticed her own hands trembling in anger. "It would have been nice for you if McGee would have died instead of your other partner. After all, he was just rookie, not very important at all. I am sure …"

She never got the chance to finish her statement. Tony had grabbed her, spun her around, and pinned her against the wall by the vending machine. "Don't you ever say that! Yeah, I miss Kate, but Tim …"

Ziva didn't struggle against Tony. She didn't care if this hurt, he needed to know how he had affected McGee and maybe, just maybe, he would understand what his friend was really going through. "But Tim what? Hid at the wrong time, escaped a bullet that ended up in your partner, lived when she did not. Is that why you always take your anger out on him, because he should not be alive right now?"

"NO! I …" Tony's head was spinning. _Tim not be alive right now?_ That thought hurt, a lot, more than Tony would ever admit to anyone. "Where is all this coming from?"

"He knows how you feel … and Gibbs. He accepts it, even agrees with it."

"What?" Tony let go of Ziva, his arms and head dropping. "Damn it! I'm not angry with him. Never have been. It's just … I …"

Ziva crossed her arms and stood there, she was not going to make this easy for him. "No? I seem to remember you being very angry at McGee when Director Sheppard died. He was not even around and yet you placed all your anger on him. Not me, or Gibbs, or Franks, McGee. Why? Unless you have never forgiven him for Agent Todd."

Tony stood a moment digesting everything Ziva a said. He thought back through the years of knowing McGee. All the crap he dealt to the young man and how McGee just kept getting strong and more confident. At least that's what he thought McGee was doing. It wasn't until now that he realized that Tim was burying his feelings and trying to mold himself into what he thought Tony and Gibbs wanted.

"Damn it. There was nothing ever to forgive. I'm not sorry he survived, I just wish Kate would have too, ya know." DiNozzo started rubbing the back of his head in frustration. "I take my anger out on Tim because, well because he's there."

Ziva snorted.

"Not like that. He takes it, I get it off my chest and we go on working. If I didn't have him as an outlet … if I didn't think he was strong enough …"

"Why does he have to be your outlet. There are a million other ways to let go of your anger."

"I dunno. I guess it because …"

"Because …"

"It's what brothers do, isn't. They take crap from each other and then move on, the bond stronger than ever. Right?"

Ziva sighed and shook her head. "If it was something unrelated to McGee, I think you would be right. However, because he carries the burden of guilt, your anger only re-enforces his belief that he is, indeed, to blame."

"I'm not angry at him."

"Oh?"

He let his arm drop back down to his side. "No. With Kate and Jenny, even now. I'm angry with myself. With Kate and Jenny I kept thinking 'Was there more I could have done.' With Jenny, the answer is yes, but I was too busy having fun to notice. With McGee …" Tony took a deep breath to finally admit what had been eating at him since this started. "… I keep thinking, How much am I like the bullies from his past? Does he know how much his friendship means to me? Have I ever shown him anything in the way of support?"

"That is for McGee to decided." Ziva walked over to Tony. His head was still down. "Until then, you need to actually think before you open that big mouth of yours. He has been hurt enough. From his past and from us. I, for one, value his friendship. If I end up being the only one, I will stand by his side and fight off everyone."

DiNozzo's head snapped up, again angry. "You really think you're the only one who doesn't want to see him hurt any more?"

Ziva just glared at him.

"Well, your not!" Tony pushed past her to grab the Nutter Butters that she had purchased. He turned around and started to leave, until Ziva gripped his arm again, as she had done in the bullpen.

"Where are you going and what do you think you are doing with those?"

He glared at her, his hazel eyes filled with determination. "I'm going to show him and you that you are not the only one who cares." He yanked his arm out of Ziva's grasp and stalked away.

Ziva followed right behind. "I warn you, do not upset him further. If you do, I will find ways to kill you that will make your head wobble."

"Spin, Ziva." Tony stopped mid stride to turn around and looked her straight in her brown eyes. "And if I upset him, then you can do what ever you want with me."

They stared intensely at each other until Ziva gave a small nod. Tony nodded back and went off to repair the damage he had done.

XXXX

McGee sat at his desk shaking. _Tony's right. If I would have remembered about the stoning …_ He read through his report. _I think this is everything, all scars accounted for. Something's not right. All of the accomplish marks are account for, the ladder, the stoning, the tree, the pit. So why stuff someone in a locker? Theodore never did that to me, it happened before he came … didn't it? Is there something else I'm missing?_

As Tim tried to mull it over, Roger was keeping a very close eye on him. He wanted to say something to Tim, but wasn't sure if it was his place. Would he make things worse? Did he have any right to try to comfort Tim? For the first time in a long time, Roger was frozen with indecisiveness.

While he was trying to decide, Gibbs came back. He could feel the thick atmosphere in the bullpen. He glared at Roger, thinking he was the cause of it.

Roger didn't notice, he was still watching McGee.

Gibbs was ready to say something, until Tony and Ziva came walking back in. He studied their faces. Ziva was steaming mad and Tony was on a mission. Gibbs sighed. _What did DiNozzo do now?_

Tony stopped in front of McGee's desk and held out the Nutter Butters. "Here Tim."

"Thanks, Tony" Tim reached out a shaky hand and grabbed the cookies without looking away from his computer. DiNozzo however didn't let go. "Tim …"

McGee was too afraid to look at the senior field agent in the eyes, so he just looked towards him. Ziva had slipped behind Tim and place a hand on his shoulder and squeezed.

"Tim, I … please look at me."

Cautiously, Tim raised his eyes. What he saw reflected back from Tony wasn't anger or mistrust or annoyance. It was apologetic, which confused Tim. He wanted to say something, but the words were lost somewhere in his head.

Tony and Tim held each other's gaze and the cookies until Tim's shaking stopped. Tony nodded, "Okay?"

Tim nodded back, "Thanks Tony." He pulled again at the Nutter Butters, but Tony still held on, giving Tim a very sincere look. Tim knew what Tony wanted, forgiveness. To Tim, there was nothing to forgive, because Tony was right. Had been all these years. "Really, Tony."

Tony gave a soft smile and finally let go of the treat. He knew he had a long way to go gain Tim's confidence, but he was going to work very hard to do just that. Tim was his best friend, his brother, and Tony refused to let him down any more.


	20. Chapter 20

I was right, you guys really enjoyed the last chapter! :-) Just don't be too hard on Tony, he is the kind to react first, then think. Right now he feels two inches tall. He'll get it together.  
>Very excited! The new season premiers tonight! (Although, I have to admit, I want to get through the opener so that we can get to the episode about McGee &amp; his momgrandma!)

Disclaimer: I do not own any of NCIS or am I making any profit by borrowing these characters.

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><p>The day wore on and on. Abby didn't find anything new. There was absolutely nothing of the killer left behind. Both DiNozzo and McGee were having no luck with either of their searches. Ziva, well she was doing the same as yesterday, keeping Tim grounded.<p>

It was 21:00 when Gibbs finally called it a night. He looked around the squad room. Everyone was exhausted, both physically and emotionally. As his team wrapped up their work, the Air Force night protection detail arrived. He looked at Sergeant Ferris and raised an eyebrow at him.

Roger gave a quick look to McGee and then back to Gibbs.

Gibbs gave nod of understanding. Roger wanted McGee to feel as safe as possible by staying away from Gibbs' home, it was going to be the one place that wouldn't be tainted with the past.

Ziva glared at both Gibbs and DiNozzo as she walked past them, holding on to McGee's arm. They took the first elevator down with Staff Sergeant Boyer and Airman Starcher.

Gibbs looked back at DiNozzo. "What the hell was that all about?"

Tony sighed. "Well, it seems that Tim is feeling like this whole mess is his fault and I pretty much confirmed it."

"What?"

Tony just shook his head. "I kind of lost it when I came back to bullpen."

Gibbs gave him a confused look.

"He has another scar. From having stones thrown at him. It made me mad to think about how hurt he has been. Instead of being a friend, I took my anger out on him … again."

Gibbs face grew dark. "There's more." It was a statement.

Tony ran his hand through his hair and he grabbed the back of head again. "He …" Tony swallowed hard. "He still has survivor's guilt over Kate."

Gibbs was floored. "He what?"

Tony shrugged. "I don't know all of it, but he said something to Ziva about knowing that we would have rather Kate lived instead of him."

Gibbs just stared in shock.

DiNozzo shrugged, gathered his things, and moved to the elevator. He stepped in followed by Airman Masterson, then Gibbs.

Not a word was spoken as they traveled to the garage. When they arrived, Ziva and Tim were settled into a car with the two Air Force men, waiting to go.

The three other men went to a second car and drove all the way to Gibbs' home still encased in silence.

XXXX

When they arrived, none of the team was allowed to leave their cars until the airmen checked the area and gave the okay. Two cars, carrying Abby, Ducky, and Jimmy, pulled up while waiting for the airmen.

Once the 'All Clear' was given, seven car doors opened simultaneously. Ziva walked around to again grab on to McGee, all the while, glaring at the rest of the team. They entered the house first.

Abby bounded up to Gibbs. "What was that look all about?" Ducky and Jimmy following close behind.

Gibbs gave a sad sigh, wrapped an arm around Abby's shoulders and give her a kiss to her temple. "Tim's had a lot to deal with today. It's bringing back lots of bad memories."

"Okay, I get that. But why the death glare?"

"Apparently it's not just bad memories from his childhood."

Abby looked from Gibbs sad face to Tony's guilty one and back. "Like what?"

"Kate." Tony said sadly.

"I don't understand."

Tony was watching his shoes. "McGee thinks that we, Gibbs and me, are upset that he lived and Kate didn't."

Ducky gave a sympathetic sigh. "Oh dear. Is he still carrying that around?"

Gibbs, Abby and Tony turned as a unit towards Doctor Mallard. Gibbs spoke for the three. "You knew?"

Ducky shook his head. "I thought he let go of that along time ago. At least I had hoped so, especially with all of the other guilt he carries around."

"What other guilt?" Gibbs demanded to know.

Ducky shook his head. "It is too much to get into now." He looked towards the house. "I wish to check over Timothy. Does anyone know if he has eaten much, today?"

Gibbs and DiNozzo shook their heads in unison. Ducky bit back smile as they looked like a father and son set of bobble heads.

"Then it is time that I looked over our young agent." Ducky lead the way with Abby right behind, followed by Gibbs and Tony, with Jimmy bringing up the rear.

What they heard as soon as they entered the house was Ziva mothering Tim. "McGee, you must eat, even if I must shove it down your throat myself."

"Ziva, I … I'm just not hungry."

"You will eat!"

"Ziva …"

Ducky smiled wide and turned back to the group. "I better go save him before Ziva makes good on her threat."

Ducky and Jimmy walked into the kitchen. Gibbs, Abby, and Tony stood just outside of the kitchen, watching what was happening.

Tim turned to everybody coming in and gave a shaky smile. He then turned his attention to Ducky, with pleading eyes.

"I am sorry Timothy, but Ziva is correct. You need to get something in you."

Tim sighed. "It's almost 22:00, its really too late to be eating anything. Besides …"

Ziva laid a hand on McGee's shoulder and squeezed. "Besides, what McGee."

He looked to her and then back to Ducky. "I don't think I could keep anything down." Tim blushed and lowered his head.

"Oh dear." Ducky rubbed his chin in thought. However, it was Jimmy who came up with a solution. He reached into his bag and brought out a nutritional shake. "Try this Tim."

Ducky grabbed it first to look over the label. Nodding his approval, handed it to McGee. "This will do nicely. You must drink all of it though."

McGee took the shake with a quizzical look. He huffed, but obeyed doctor's orders. When he was finished, he scanned the crowd watching him. "Better?"

Gibbs actually smiled. Right now, McGee was reminding him more of a pouting kid rather than a federal agent. "Yes McGee, better."

Tony wanted a chance to work things out with his partner. "Hey buddy, you up to picking up where we left off with the movies?"

McGee shook his head. "Not tonight. I just want to sleep." Tim got warily to his feet and headed for the stairs. He stopped. "Boss, do you want your room back?"

Gibbs walked over and mirrored Ziva's actions by placing a hand on McGee's shoulder. "No Tim, go ahead. I think you need the rest."

McGee gave a sleepy smile. "Thanks Boss."

They all watched Tim make his way upstairs. He stopped at the top. "Hey, where's Jethro?" Before anyone could move, the object of concern came bounding out of the bedroom. "There you are." Tim bent down to greet his dog. "Do you need to go out?"

"Just send him down Tim. We'll take care of him." Gibbs called up.

McGee nodded. "Go ahead, Jethro." The dog gave his master a sloppy kiss and headed down the stairs. Tim gave a small laugh, shook his head and went into the bedroom.

Ziva, still glaring at the team, started up the stairs, petting Jethro as they passed.

Gibbs grabbed her arm. "Hey …"

"Not now Gibbs. He is going to need me."

"We need to work this out."

"Later."

"Ziva …"

"No Gibbs." She continued to glare and yanked her arm free from Gibbs' hold. "McGee is my only concern right now. It is about time somebody thought of him first."

Gibbs let her go without any more resistance. His heart felt heavy as he turned from the stairs His namesake giving him a sideways look. "Come on." The dog gladly followed him outside.

Abby went to follow Gibbs, but Tony grabbed her and just shook his head. Everyone fell silent as they got ready for the second night of protecting Timothy McGee, all of them wondering just who they were protecting him from.

XXXX

Ziva went into the bedroom, finding it empty. "McGee?"

"In here Ziva."

Ziva walked over to the bathroom wondering what McGee was doing. She became concerned when she saw him scrubbing away at the tub. "McGee, what are you doing?"

Tim looked up at her and smiled. "Cleaning up after Jethro." He chuckled at Ziva's confused look. "Even as good of a dog as he is, trying to not relief himself all day is hard. It is easier to clean this than a floor or rug."

"You taught him this?"

Tim shook his head. "Nope, either his previous owner did, or he taught himself."

Ziva remembered back to exactly how McGee and Jethro met. "I have to admit, I am surprised how … close?" She looked over questioningly to Tim to see if that was correct. When he nodded, she continued "How close you two have become."

"Yeah, me too. I was terrified of him for weeks." Tim continued to clean.

Ziva scowled. "You were afraid? I thought you wanted Jethro?"

Tim finished cleaning and put the supplies away. "No, not at first."

"Then why?"

Tim shrugged. "Abby." He washed his hand, his back to Ziva.

Her scowl deepened. "What do you mean?"

Tim turned around and shrugged again. "You know how she gets." He saw Ziva's returning anger and sighed. "It's okay. It all worked out for the best. I wouldn't trade Jethro for the world."

"That is not the point McGee."

Tim walked up to Ziva and place his hands on her shoulders. "I'm fine with it. You should be too. Please, don't be mad at them any more. Please."

It was her turn to sigh. "It is hard not to be." She looked into his worried eyes. "But is even harder to be. I will let them off the skewer tomorrow." She reached up and place her hands on top of his.

"Hook, let them off the hook … and thanks Ziva."

She gave a slight squeeze, "Thanks are not needed, however, you are welcome." Ziva knew that their friendship had deepened and she was reminded again of how lucky she was to know him.

Tim was also very thankful for his friend. _I don't why I deserve her friendship, but I'm glad I have it._ Smiling slightly and giving her a finale squeeze he let go of her shoulders. "I'm going to get ready to turn in."

"Turn into what?"

His smile grew. "The bed. I am going to melt into it, when you come back you won't even be able to see me."

"Back? Where do you think I am going?"

Tim's only response was to raise an eyebrow.

Ziva was ready for some mischief. "Are you saying that you do not wish for me to stay in your bed again, McGee?"

Finally, some color came back to McGee's face as he blushed. "Ziva, you don't have to …"

"I want to. Besides, it is much nicer than listening to Tony snore."

Tim actually laughed at that. "Okay, okay. You win."

"I always do McGee."

He just shook his head and turned back into the bathroom to change. Ziva smiled after him, glad to hear a laugh. She walked over to the bed, sat down and took off her shoes, her smile waning. _Tonight is going to be even worse than last night._ She looked back to the bathroom door. _He is so forgiving, I wonder how he learned to be?_ She remembered McGee commenting once that his dad raised him to be a gentleman. It made her wonder exactly what he had went through in his childhood.

She heard the bathroom door re-open. She shoved her thoughts away and replaced her smile as she turned to face McGee.

He gave a weary smile and literally crawled into the bed and slunk under the covers. He rested next to Ziva's leg as she sat in the same position as the night before.

As she did the night before, she place a hand on Tim's shoulder. She started talking softly, cover everything from her favorite dessert to her favorite torture device.

Tim settled in and drifted off to sleep comforted by his friend's voice.


	21. Chapter 21

I have fallen behind again on responding to reviews. I am working ALOT of overtime this week, so my apologize in advance in not being able to personally respond to your reviews. Thank you in advance and know that I am grateful and honored.  
>The season premier was a little disappointing, the team was too much in the background, but it made sense since we were finding out about DiNozzo's mission. I won't give away any more. Just glad to be able to move on and hope they have decided to give McGee something interesting to do this season. ~fingers crossed~<p>

Disclaimer: Just borrowing, I own nothing of NCIS.

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><p>Gibbs let the dog run around his backyard, watching him without really seeing him. He let his thoughts go back to years ago, to that fateful day. Yes, he had lost team members before, but Kate had really thrown him for an emotional loop.<p>

Watching Kate grow into her role as an NCIS agent made Gibbs feel like he had stolen a prize right out from under the Secret Service. He would grin to himself as she quickly became DiNozzo's equal.

What had really done it, had really been the crux of it all was Kate's final words to him. _"I thought I'd have to die before …"_ She never got to finish, Ari stopped her.

It was the fact that she didn't know how proud he was of her that really threw the unflappable Jethro Gibbs. It wasn't that she took a bullet for him right before, it was how she kept her head about it. He knew that was her job when she was part of the Secret Service, protect the President at all costs, but to get maneuvered, block the sniper's target, and still yell out about a shooter, well that took one hell of an agent.

And Kate was that. When the kill shot came, the moment was too full of irony for Gibbs to react at all. Both he and Tony just stood there, frozen in a terrible moment in time.

It was actually McGee who brought time back into motion, a concerned call over the earwigs started time moving again and realization of what had just happened.

Maybe that is why both he and Tony had treated McGee so terribly afterwards, he started time moving again. If they had been allowed to stay in that moment, then neither of them would have had to accept the terrible truth of losing someone so valued.

Or was it because Tim had been spared having to see Kate die? They all grieved, but for some reason, it seemed like McGee didn't have the right too. He had been spared the horrific sight of actually watching her go from living to dead, what right did he have to feel such a personal loss?

Gibbs shook his head at himself. He didn't feel that way about Abby, why McGee? The answer made him really look at himself as a team leader. It was because Tim had become the outlet. Unknowingly, unwillingly and to whatever end, Timothy McGee had become the team's outlet.

Even when Director Sheppard died, both he and Tony had yelled, been angry and demanded results out of McGee. With no thought to what they were doing, Tim became the solid ground they needed in order to keep level headed.

_Have they ever thanked him? Have I? After losing Kate, did I ever do anything to let my agents know just how proud I am of them? We are the lead team at NCIS, each one of us giving so much of ourselves to finish a case. How many cold cases do we have? Not many. That's because of their dedication. Have I ever said anything to any of them of how proud that makes me?_

A soft grip on his shoulder brought Gibbs out of his thoughts. "Don't dwell to much on it Jethro. Let Ziva be angry for now. It will make her more focused."

Gibbs looked up at Ducky as he sat down beside him. "What other guilt, Duck?"

"Jethro …"

"I need to know."

Ducky gave a long sigh. "Very well, just try not to harp on the boy about it." He gave his friend a sideways glare. "It was hard enough to have him confide in me, let alone if he thinks I am telling his tales."

Gibbs gave a mute nod.

"It started before he even joined the team. Do you remember Agent Christopher Pacci?"

"Of course."

"He needed some files from Timothy. By the time he had received them, you had moved onto another case and Christopher had to delay coming to you about his suspicions."

"Okay …" Gibbs had no idea where this was going.

"Our Timothy felt, maybe still feels, that if he would have gotten the files to Chris sooner, he would still be alive."

Gibbs blinked in shock. He was actually afraid to ask, but he did anyway. "What else?"

"I believe some of them are obvious. Erin Kendall, Benedict, Abby …"

"Abby's still alive, Duck."

"Yes well, there are all of the times he has put her in danger."

Gibbs eyebrows knit in confusion. "What times?"

"Mawer, and then that computerized car, his book, Mexico."

"Mexico?"

"My lord Jethro, do you really have no idea what is happening with your team?"

Gibbs looked away from his friend. "Apparently not."

"I am sorry, that came out much harsher than I intended."

"Go on."

Ducky looked at his friend again. "Are you sure?"

Gibbs gave a crisp nod.

"Very well. There are of course, the two gentlemen who died because of his book. Then there is Petty Officer Fargo, …"

"Wait why him? McGee didn't have any connection to him besides trying to hack into his computer."

"Because Director Vance divided the team in order to find the mole, which if Timothy would have been faster, maybe it wouldn't have taken all summer, maybe Ziva wouldn't have been nearly killed in a bomb blast, maybe Petty Officer Roberts and Agents Lee and Langer would still be alive, maybe …"

"Enough." Gibbs wiped his face. "How can he function with all that guilt?"

Ducky shrugged. "It is as Mr. Palmer has said. He has a great sense of purpose. Something that keeps him moving forward."

Gibbs and Ducky sat in silence for awhile. McGee's dog, came and sat at the bottom of the steps, waiting to be let back inside to his master.

"How did you get him to confide in you?"

"Purely by accident. I found him in autopsy after the Benedict shooting. Everyone else had left for the day. He was talking not only to the detective, but to Caitlin. Saying how much better she would have done, how much she would have liked Ziva, and that he was sorry that he had lived."

Gibbs snapped his head up at that comment.

"I know. That comment worried me as well. I marched into that dark room and forced that young man to ah, spill his guts, so to speak. When he was done I very bluntly asked him if he was having thoughts of hurting himself."

Ducky shook his head. "That shocked him more than anything. He said that he could never dishonor any of the lives he lost by taking the easy way out."

"Is that the only thing keeping him going?"

"I do not believe so, but what ever it is, I am thankful."

"That makes two of us."

They sat in quiet, watching the night stretch on, until the dog didn't want to wait any more to be by McGee's side. He went to the door and started pawing at it.

"I see that he is just as demanding as you." Ducky gave a smile as he stood up. "Dear me, I am getting too old to be sitting in one position for any length of time." He placed a comforting hand on Gibbs' shoulder, and then let himself and the dog back into the house.

XXXX

As Ducky came in, Jethro took off, running straight upstairs to the bedroom. He, again, pawed at the door. Ziva's voice came in a harsh whisper. "Quiet! He is already asleep. No, Jethro …" The door was softly closed.

Abby's gaze had followed the dog as he went to be by his master. She brought her gaze down from the stairs to look at Ducky. "I feel like we are being shut out."

"Give it time Abigail. Once Timothy is more sure of himself, he will reach out to all of you."

"If we deserve it." DiNozzo said softly behind Abby.

Doctor Mallard took a good look at the two young people hurting in front of him. "Timothy has not lost his faith in either of you."

"Last night, you said …"

"Anthony, last night I said that you all needed to understand what Timothy means to you. Both personally and professionally. Knowing you have come to that understanding, all you need to do is show him." Ducky looked upstairs and gave a slight nod.

"Remember, it is his belief in himself that is at a low point."

Abby came up and gave Ducky a hug. "How's the Bossman?"

"I have given him much to think about. He is more of a doer than a thinker." Ducky gave them a playful smile. He gave a quick squeeze back to Abby and called for his assistant. "Mr. Palmer, I do believe it is time for us to go."

"Sure thing Doctor Mallard." Jimmy came out of the kitchen, dusting his hands.

"Palmer, what have you been up to?" DiNozzo asked with a wary smirk.

Jimmy gave a short shrug. "Since he seemed to do okay with the protein drink, I thought I would stalk up on them. I had one of the Air Force guys take me to a nearby store." He put his hands on his waist and gave a proud nod.

"Aw, that's good thinking. Way to go Jimmy." Abby stepped over to Palmer and they exchanged a high-five.

Ducky was getting his coat on and started a story while waiting for Palmer to catch up. "Yes, good thinking, indeed. Have I ever told you about the time that I had to make my two days worth of MRE's stretch for two weeks. The best way to go about that is …

Palmer was shaking his head as he closed the door behind him. Tony and Abby still felt lost. Abby gave a quick nod to her self and then turned to Tony and gave him a sharp punch to the arm.

'Ow, hey! What was that for?"

"For not listening to Ducky! Suck it up Tony! Timmy needs us! If we are wallowing, then how can we help him?"

Tony gave a huff. "I know, I know." He rubbed at his arm while letting his thoughts churn. He finally looked at Abby and gave an impish grin. "You know, you're crazy for feeling bad for the Tuscan Raiders, they are bad news."

"Hun, what?" It took Abby a moment to catch up. "Oh, so what, not all of them were bad." She returned the smile with a little one of her own.

'Of course they are, that was the point. Somethings are just black and white."

"No way! That's like saying all German's are Nazis, or all Japanese are ninjas, or all dogs bark, or …"

"Abs, they kinda do."

"No way! I've heard a dog quack and squeal and talk and …"

They debated everything from the movie, to dogs, to food, to where-ever the conversation took them. Anything to keep themselves from thinking about what they've put their friend through all these years.

XXXX

Gibbs sat outside for another hour before he started making his rounds. He checked with the airmen first, then went inside. He started a new pot of coffee as he heard Tony and Abby debating whether it was better to find fingerprints or DNA.

He shook his head at those two and continued his path.

Two hours later, all was quiet. Tony and Abby had fallen asleep right in the middle of debating what is the best vending machine treat.

Gibbs was on his fourth time through the house and just as many cups of coffee. He decided to go check on his other two agents. He had stayed away at first, trying to make sure to let them sleep. He wanted to peak in on them just to make sure all was well, just like he had done when Kelly had troubled nights.

He was right outside the door when he heard distressed moaning. Ziva's soft voice came immediately after. He couldn't hear what was being said, but could tell from the tone, she was trying to comfort McGee. She sound so much like Shannon that it actually made his heart ache.

Gibbs stepped away from the door, knowing that Ziva had this under control, until he heard McGee shout-out. "No! Stop!"

Without another thought, he ran to the door and threw it open. McGee was on his hands and knees on the bed. Ziva was facing him, one arm around his back, another under his arm, in an awkward hug. "Ssshhh. Easy McGee."

"Please! I have to … Stop! My fault … can't let … anyone else! My fault!."

"No McGee, sshh, easy, go back to sleep for me. All is well, you are safe."

"No! My fault!"

Ziva was not just struggling to get Tim back to sleep, but to also hold onto him. This was a full blown night terror and would not be easily assuaged.

Gibbs heard running coming from behind, three sets of feet. He turned around to face the first person up the stairs, which ended up being his senior agent. "It's just a nightmare, Tony. Keep everyone back. Tim's going to be embarrassed enough about this, he doesn't need an audience."

Tony just gave a mute nod, turned and went halfway down the steps to stop the airmen.

Gibbs turned back into the bedroom. Ziva had managed to calm McGee down a little. He was laying back down, but he was restless.

Ziva was crouching on the bed, softly whispering to McGee. Gibbs walked up behind her and place a gentle hand on her shoulder. "How long."

She jumped at the touch and the voice. "All night. This was the first time that it was this bad, though." She was gently stroking the top of Tim's head, trying to keep him calm.

Gibbs knew this second night without much sleep was really going to catch up with both of them. He made a fatherly and team lead decision. "Ziva, go get some shut-eye. I'll stay with him."

Ziva shot Gibbs a look that was unreadable. "I can handle this, Gibbs."

Gibbs shook his head. "You are running on very little sleep. Both of you are. If either of you are going to be any good for this investigation, then you need sleep."

"But, McGee …"

"Don't worry, Ziva, I won't hurt him."

She looked at Gibbs, seeing his worry. She started to say something, but McGee became vocal again. "No … stop … don't hurt … my fault … my … fault."

Before she could do anything, Gibbs sat down on the bed beside her, grabbed McGee's hand, and spoke in a voice that she never knew Gibbs possessed, soft and gentle.

"Hey, it's okay son. It's just a nightmare. Nothing is your fault. Go back to sleep." Gibbs had to repeat himself three times before McGee started to relax again.

He looked over to Ziva. "Go, just be back before he wakes up. Finding you in his bed is one thing. Finding me …"

Ziva smirked at that. She gave a short nod and left the room.

McGee lay flat on his back, his dog had came over and laid his head on McGee's chest, another silent protector.

McGee stayed quiet for about ten minutes before the nightmare came back. "Please … stop … don't hurt … I'll … take punishment … don't hurt … my fault …"

Gibbs frowned at this new development. He squeezed McGee's hand and reassured him in the same soft and gentle voice from before.

It was a little easier to calm him down this time and the gap grew from ten minutes to thirty before the next night terror came. McGee clamped down on Gibb's hand, "My punishment … don't … hurt …"

Gibbs squeezed back, again speaking quietly and comfortingly until he eased Tim back to sleep. Gibbs caught on to the tell-tell signs of when a night terror was coming and figured out how to put McGee at ease before it could get into full swing.

Outside the bedroom door, Tony watched the two. He very much wanted to help, but knowing he was the reason Tim was having such a tough night, he held back. He decided the best way to help was by letting Ziva sleep and Gibbs keep watch over Tim. He was going to do the night patrol himself.

He went downstairs, sighed to himself and started another pot of coffee.


	22. Chapter 22

Tim stirred, trying to wake from the fog that was encompassing him. He knew he had a rough night, his body was aching. He rolled over expecting to see Ziva but froze when he saw Gibbs instead.

The team leader at some point, had brought in a chair and was now sound asleep, chin resting on his chest, hands clasped together laying on his abdomen.

McGee rolled over and hid his face in Jethro. _What happened? Why is Gibbs in here? Where's Ziva? Oh no! I must have hurt her and Gibbs had to …_ Tim let out a stifled moan, worried about his friend.

Gibbs was awake in an instant, thinking another night terror was coming. He rested his hand on Tim's shoulder, offering comforting words.

McGee was shocked. He couldn't comprehend what Gibbs was doing and why. He laid still, thinking Gibbs would either stop or just give him a good head slap. However, Gibbs' soft voice lulled him back into a drowsy state and before he realized it, he fell back to sleep.

Gibbs felt McGee's shoulder relax and heard his breath deepen. He smiled and leaned back in his chair. After the first few hours, it had became relatively easy for him to ease McGee back to sleep. It made him realize even more, that all Tim wanted was a father to protect and comfort him.. Gibbs was more than happy to offer both.

A soft knock made Gibbs turn away from McGee. Ziva was standing in the doorway, a soft smile on her face. The two locked eyes for a moment, coming to an understanding. She smiled more, Gibbs gave a quick nod. He then stood and stretched out his back. As he walked out of the room he placed a hand on Ziva's shoulder and squeezed. "In his nightmares he mentioned 'taking his own punishment', see if you can get him talking about it."

Ziva raised an eyebrow, but nodded in agreement. Gibbs gave one last look over his shoulder, then left to get ready for the day.

Once Gibbs was gone, Ziva assumed her sitting position on the bed and looked at the clock. The alarm would be going off with in the hour. She glanced down at the still dozing figure beside her, worrying over Gibbs' request. _What other torment could he have gone through?_ Ziva wasn't sure she wanted an answer to that question.

XXXX

The alarm going off brought McGee quickly out of sleep. He rolled over and stretched his arm over someone's legs in an effort to stop the noise. He rolled onto his back, placed a hand over his face and groaned.

"Good Morning, McGee."

Tim turned his head slightly to see Ziva. He smiled at first but then frowned as he thought back to earlier. He gingerly sat up, began petting Jethro, and looked Ziva over in concern. "Are you alright? I thought Gibbs …"

Ziva smiled, started to respond, but changed her mind. She knew that to lie McGee now would damage any progress made in their friendship. She decided to answer him honestly. "Yes, Gibbs was here. He stayed with you most of the night."

"Why, did I hurt you?"

"Hurt me?"

Tim sighed. "I know I had a rough night, my nightmares can be pretty intense … and physical." He looked away from her, focusing on Jethro instead.

Ziva was surprised. "You have had nightmares like that before?"

McGee shrugged. "Not often. During my fist semester of college, they started up again. My girlfriend at the time tried to get me into a sleep study after I gave her a black eye during one of my terrors." His face redden with shame. "I felt so bad by what I had done, I couldn't face her again. She said she understood, her brother had gone through the same thing, that she forgave me. I couldn't forgive myself."

Ziva could see how much this still hurt her friend. She reached out an gently grabbed his arm. "You did not do anything to harm me. Gibbs just thought it would be better if at least one of the team got proper sleep."

Tim looked up and searched her eyes for any sign that she was holding back, and found none. He let out a breath in relief and nodded. "Good. I was so worried when I saw Gibbs in here. That was the only reason I could think of why he would be in here instead of you."

"The only reason?"

Tim gave her a questioning look. "Yeah, sure. I mean why else would he stay with me?"

Ziva sighed. "Because he wanted to help you. Just like I do. Just like Abby and Ducky and Jimmy and yes, believe it or not, even Tony."

That brought a small smile to his face, briefly. Then he shook his head. "I hate this Ziva. I hate all of this attention. I just want things to go back to normal."

"And we want you to know how important you are to us as a friend and a team member."

"I already know."

"Do you, really? Because I know I feel that I have been lacking in that area, and I believe the others do as well."

"Ziva …"

"No, McGee. You must understand that we depend on you just as much as each other. We do not like to see you hurt. Plus, knowing that we are the cause of some of that hurt make it worse for us."

"You guys aren't …"

"No?" She cut him off. "Then why will you not open up to us?"

"Ziva, we never do that. Have you ever told us when a case is getting to you? What about Gibbs or Tony?" He was starting to get angry. "Why is it that everyone else can just bottle up their emotions and get the job done, but I'm not allowed?"

Ziva was actually glad to see the anger, it was a definite improvement from the depression that had been settling around him. "Because we want better for you."

That deflated Tim's anger a little. "I just want to be treated like everyone else." He went back to focusing on his dog, who had placed his head in Tim's lap.

Ziva smiled a little, she understood where he was coming from. She thought of a way to help Tim accept their concern, but didn't like the analogy she was about to make. _I do not want to encourage his belief that he is just equipment to us, but_ _as long as it helps him …_ "Well McGee, think of it this way, what does Abby do when she thinks something is wrong with her Mass Spectrometer?"

McGee gave a little shrug. "She babies it until she knows it is working okay." He was still focusing on his dog.

"Alright, how about Tony when his car is in need of repair?"

McGee actually started smiling. "He takes it to the best mechanic he can afford." Tim thought he could see where she was going with this.

"Or Gibbs when his e-mail is not working."

McGee laughed at that. "He shoots the computer."

Ziva laughed with him. "Alright, Gibbs is a bad example. But do you understand what I am hunting at?"

"Hinting at … and yes, I get it." He was still lavishing his dog with attention, but he looked up at Ziva. "So, I guess I should just expect some kid-glove-handling?"

Ziva smiled back at the return of the light in his eyes. "Yes, until we know that you are functioning properly again."

Tim gave a hardy laugh this time. "Okay, okay." He gave a real good shake to Jethro, then lead over and gave Ziva a soft kiss to the top of her hair. "Thanks."

Ziva smiled back as he got up from the bed. "Anytime, McGee."

He gathered his clothes and went into the bathroom to take a shower. Ziva once again pet Jethro. "I hate to compare him to equipment, but I think it will let him accept our help easier."

Jethro titled his head and gave a small 'wuf'.

"I know. We are working on it."

Once again, she let her thoughts wander while waiting for McGee to finish his shower.

XXXX

Tim again, took a very hot shower. He leaned his head against the shower wall, mulling over his dreams. _I'm missing something. Theodore wasn't around for the locker incident, was he? Think Tim!_

However, the harder he thought the more he came back to all that had happened this morning. He had to admit to himself that he actually felt more rested than he normally did after one of his bouts with night terrors. He tried to figure out why. Was it Ziva? Was it Gibbs?

He shook his head at himself. He could remember quite assurances and a feeling of complete support and trust, he just couldn't remember the voice. Then he remember the first night here at Gibbs' and how he had fallen asleep against the man's knee. Tim flushed at that, but then remember how safe he had felt then, too.

A small smile made it way across his face. He didn't want to admit how much of a father figure Gibbs had become to him, how much his NCIS team was more family than co-workers. He remembered Kate once comparing him and Tony to her brothers. Father, brothers, family. _So this is what it feels like._

That's when he realized that Ziva's comparison that morning, wasn't because she actually felt like he was equipment, but because she knew it would make him feel better … just like he had been trying to do for the team. He reached out and turned the water temperature down to where he liked it. _Enough focusing on me! There is a killer to catch!_ However, this time, the thought was made the with the determination of a confident agent.

XXXX

Ziva noticed the difference right away and smiled. _Maybe I finally got through to him._ "Are you ready to go downstairs?"

Tim looked at her and nodded. "Come on boy, let's get you taken care of." Jethro jumped down off the bed and gave a hearty bark. He ran down the step and went straight to the door leading to the back yard. "Okay, okay! I get the hint!" Tim laughed as he came down with his dog , opened the door and went outside with him.

Ziva went into the kitchen and smiled at the sight in front of her. Abby was cooking breakfast, Gibbs was getting a pot of coffee going, and then there was Tony. He was dozing at the counter, his head resting in his hands, with a cup of coffee right underneath. If his head slipped out of his hands, he would be taking a nose dive right into his coffee.

_Today is going to be a long day for him_, Ziva thought as she also tried to think of a way to play a prank on the senior field agent.

McGee came in and stood beside Ziva. He also smiled, a soft sweet smile at first, but then it turned playful. He looked at Ziva and saw she was thinking the same thing. He looked at the refrigerator, back at Ziva and wagged his eyebrows at her.

Ziva took a good look at McGee. The spark had come back to his eyes. She gave a wicked smile and nodded back. She went to sit in front of DiNozzo, McGee went to the frig first, then the cupboard.

Abby and Gibbs turned around at the same time to greet the two. Ziva put a hand up to silence them. They looked at each other, then at Ziva, then to Tim. They both saw the same thing Ziva had, and decided to play along.

Tim poured milk into a bowl and quietly crept up to Tony. He very skillfully took the coffee away and replace it with the bowl. He took a couple of steps backwards and then nodded to Ziva.

Ziva thumped down on the counter with both hands and at the same time, in her loudest voice, yelled out. "Wake up!"

The sound brought Tony awake in an instant. His eyes snapped open and he jerked his arms out before his head to ready to support itself. The result was that he found himself face down the bowl of milk. When he raised his head, Ziva was snorting in laughter. "Why you …"

He didn't finish as he realized that he had a bigger audience, he looked to one side, watching Abby trying to control her laughing and Gibbs not even trying to hid his smirk. Tony then looked to the other side and saw McGee, smiling wide. He looked back at Ziva, then to Tim again. "Who …"

Tim gave a full smile,. "Now, would I **ever **do anything to a Senior Field Agent?" He tried for a voice of innocence, failed because of trying to hold back his laughing.

Tony didn't know what to say. He was worried this was just another front, but then he took a good look at everyone through his milk covered eyes. This felt right, there was no heaviness this time. He stood and wiped his face off with his arm. "You realize this means war, Probie."

Tim just smiled back.

"Great! Now I'm going to smell like milk all day!"

"Could be worse DiNozzo." Gibbs chimed in.

"Oh, how?"

Ducky, Palmer and Jethro came into the kitchen at that moment. Ducky and Palmer stopped to take in the scene and what it meant. Jethro went straight to Tim.

Tim looked at his dog while he petted the top of his head, then looked at Tony and raised his eyebrows.

Tony immediately understood his meaning. "You wouldn't?"

Tim didn't answer, he gave Tony a challenging smirk and then left the room taking his dog with him. Ziva grabbed two plates of food and walked past Tony. "At least it wasn't superglue." She said with a smirk on her face.

"Oh, he is going to be wishing for the superglue when I'm done!" Tony had to raise his voice to make sure Ziva heard since she had not stopped moving. "Ya here me!"

Ducky was worried what had transpired and started to ask until DiNozzo started laughing.

"Boss, do I have time to clean up?"

"Make it quick DiNozzo."

"Yes, Boss!" Tony quickly left.

Ducky chanced a smile. "All is well, I take it."

"Better than it has been."

Abby placed several plates of food on the table. "That's for sure. I'm glad to see Timmy smiling again. And it was a real smile, not the fake one he's been wearing."

"Do we know what changed?' Ducky asked as he sat down in front of one of the plates.

Gibbs shook his head. "Nope, but hopefully it will last."

The four settled in to discuss the plan for the day. Twenty minuets later, the group was ready to go. As Tim was saying good bye to his dog, Jimmy grabbed a couple of the nutritional shakes, just to make sure there was some on hand.

Gibbs looked over his motley team and smiled.

XXXX

Tim still paused when he saw Roger, but this morning, he was able to get moving on his own. He sat down at his desk and went over the results of his searches.

Ziva and Tony shared a smile and sat down at their desks, also going over their work from the day before. Gibbs gave a jerk of his head towards Roger. He nodded back and the two headed up to the director's office.

No one said anything, but the thick air from the day before was gone.


	23. Chapter 23

Thanks for all you're amazing reviews! Know that I do read each and every one of them. You guys really make me smile!

Disclaimer: I am a poor cog in the wheel that is just having some fun borrowing characters from NCIS.

* * *

><p>Gibbs, in his usual style, just barged into Leon's office. This time, however, Vance was expecting him. "Good morning Gibbs, what do you have for me."<p>

"A lot of nothing." Gibbs huffed as he ran his hand through his hair. He turned to Roger. "You guys got anything?"

"No sir. I think Tim … ah, Agent McGee has gathered more information about all of the players than we ever had, but nothing is leading us to the whereabouts of either Mark Siebel or Nathaniel Enedy."

"This doesn't look good gentlemen. We have the combined efforts of the Air Force and NCIS and are getting no where."

"I don't care how it looks Vance, I want this bastard away from Tim." Gibbs growled.

"I understand where you're coming from, but I can't have such a narrow focus. Right now Tim is our only connection to the case, if we don't come up with something soon, I will have no choice but to turn it back over to the Air Force."

Gibbs huffed again and stormed out of the room. Roger had watched him leave and turned back to Director Vance. "Sir, my superiors have agreed to let this be a joint case. Why did you …"

"I know my people Staff Sergeant. This will give Gibbs the push he needs to get this done."

"He needs a push?"

Vance gave a predatory smile. "Oh, trust me. You haven't seen anything yet."

Roger gave stunned look but nodded to the Director and left behind Gibbs.

XXXX

Gibbs stormed down the steps and stood in front of his team. "Does anyone have anything?"

Tony and Ziva heard the frustration in Gibbs voice and knew they were close to losing the case. For Tim, it was just like any other case and he smiled at the normalcy of it. Plus, he had a possible lead. "I think I have something, boss."

Gibbs turned to his computer expert, "Finally!" Outwards he was as gruff as ever, but inside he was proud. _It figures it would be Tim to find a lead in his own case._

"Mark's checks are being mail to a post office box in the name of Charlie Chaplin."

"You're kidding , right?" DiNozzo snickered. "Maybe we should start looking for Greta Garbo and Rudolph Valentino while we're at it."

Ziva scowled. "When did they become part of the investigation? I do not remember coming across their names?"

Tony sighed and shook his head. "Ziva, Ziva, Ziva … how can you call yourself an American now and don't know the importance of these people."

Ziva started to respond, but was cut off by Gibbs. "Hey! Knock it off and focus. Go on McGee."

"The contents of the mail box are usually pick up once a month, but nothing has been picked up for the last three. That's right before the first murder happened."

It was Gibbs' turn to be cut off as his phone rang. "Yeah, Gibbs." A smile spread across his face. "Thanks, I owe you one … yes, just one. Bye Fornell." Gibbs relayed the information to his team. "It seems that Tim was on the right track. When Mark Sieble disappeared, Charlie Chaplin took his place, they have the same physical description."

"So Mark changed his name." McGee started a new search going. "Now, if I can find …"

"No need McGee. Fornell has found his address, gear up." Everyone stood, Gibbs turned to McGee. "Not you Tim. Stay here and keep trying to track down Nathaniel, they might be working together."

McGee paused, not sure why he was being left behind. "Boss, I can handle this. Really."

Gibbs walked over to him. "Listen, your under protective custody and we could be walking into a lion's den. I'm not about to give him easy access to his target."

"Boss …"

"No." Gibbs placed his hands on McGee's shoulders and forced him down into his chair. He leaned down to look at McGee eye level. "Let us protect you."

McGee bite his lower lip, a myriad of emotions playing through this eyes. However, never one to defy Gibbs, he simply nodded.

Gibbs gave a firm squeeze and stood up. "Sergeant Ferris you're with us."

Roger nodded, at first to Gibbs and then to his men. Airmen Williams and Masterson stayed behind to watch their charge.

Tim watched as he let his team leave for unknown danger without him.

XXXX

Tim tried to get back to work, but he kept thinking of his team … and his family, especially Sarah. His parents had kept him as far way from her as they could when she was first born. He never held her as a baby, or feed her, or changed a diaper, nothing. He knew his parents would have like to keep it that way, but necessity forced the issue.

The next time his dad was deployed, his mom had to go back to work. She took the night shift at the base hospital and Tim, age eleven, had to watch Sarah, who was two. He tried to keep his distance with her, knowing it would be easier for her in the long run, but when he was being stared at with two big brown innocent eyes, that wanted nothing more than his affection, he couldn't resist. He would play with her, read books (both children's and his school books) and watch TV so they ended up becoming very close. Much to the dismay of their mom.

Captain McGee returned from his tour the month after Sarah turned four. He came home wanting to lavish his daughter with gifts and attention, but found her totally focused on her big brother. Sarah wouldn't leave Tim's lap and every present she received, she showed to her big brother. Their father was furious, even made some very vile accusations, ended up sending Tim to the base doctors for evaluation.

Tim shook his head at the memories. He remember the day the doctor told his parents that Tim's and Sarah's affection for each other was normal and healthy. The doctor also gave a warning not to come between the sibling bond, or they could end up alienating both of their children. Not that they listened.

Over the next year, their parents encouraged Sarah in everything that was opposite to her brother. Athletics, boating, theater, anything that Tim would never be involved with, but Sarah never left her brother out. She would come home and tell him of her triumphs and defeats. The only thing that bothered her was that Tim never attended any of her events or competitions. He didn't want to turn her against their parents, so he never told her it was because he was forbidden to, he passed it off has having too much work with school.

It all culminated on Sarah's fifth birthday. She had wanted to go to an amusement park, which their parents readily agreed, knowing that even at fourteen, Tim couldn't handle any of the rides. When the three got ready to leave, Sarah started crying because Tim wasn't coming along.

~Flashback~

"But Tiiiimmyyyy …"

Tim slid off his bed and scooped up his crying sister holding her close. "Listen, it's not that I don't want to be with you on your special day, in fact, it's because I don't want to ruin it."

"Why would you?"

"You know I get seasick, right?"

A small nod against his shoulder.

"Imagine that times ten. That's what rides to me."

"Times ten? That's a lot, right?"

"Yeah, squirt, it is. You don't want all of your friends seeing your big brother throwing up all over the place, now do you."

"You take pills for the seasick stuff, won't they work for this too?"

"Afraid not."

"But I want you there!" Sarah started crying again.

Tim put her down, but stayed eye level with her. Sarah was the only person he never stuttered around. She had given his life a direction and focus he didn't have before. Seeing her so upset over him broke his heart, but he knew he had the perfect solution. "Then I guess I should give you this now." He smiled slightly and pulled a small wrapped box from a near by drawer.

"My present?"

Tim nodded. "Go on, open it."

Sarah ripped into the gift, finding a small jewelry box. She carefully opened it and pulled out a sturdy gold chain with several small charms.

Tim took it from her and explained as he put it on. "The shoe is for your soccer, the mask is for your plays, and the heart is for being the best little sister ever."

Sarah was stunned. "Wow! For me? Really?"

"You like?"

She threw her arms around his neck. "Yes, yes, yes! It's a big girl gift."

"Yes it is, and now you will have a part of me with you today."

She grasped the charms in her little hand, "It's not like having you there."

"Maybe not, but now you can really enjoy your day. And besides, I guess this mean's that I'll have to give you a second birthday party."

Sarah hugged him again, whispering in his ear. "I love you Timmy."

"Love you too, squirt."

XXXX

Sarah had come home fast asleep, but awoke early and rushed into Tim's room to tell her big brother everything about her big day. Tim was thoroughly enjoying her retelling of how she rode the 'Big Wheelie' two more times than Stevie Fisher, until their father came in.

"Sarah, leave us."

"What? Why?"

"Because I said so."

"No."

"What?"

Tim reached out and grabbed Sarah's arm. "It's okay squirt."

Sarah looked back over her shoulder, Tim nodded to her. She nodded back and started to walk out of the room. She paused at her dad. "Be nice to him Daddy." With a glare only a five year old could manage, Sarah stormed out.

Thad McGee's gaze never left his son. Once Sarah was safely out of the room, he cut loose. "So do you want to tell me why I'm hearing about your awards through other parents?"

Tim sighed, he had a feeling that this is what this talk was going to be about. He wasn't sure if it was because he was older, or if it was because of the support his friend Matt had given over the years, but he decided he wasn't going to back down from his dad this time. When he answered, he didn't stutter at all. "Why would I tell you? You've never been interested in what I've done before. Why start now?"

Thad walked up to his son. Even though Tim had hit his growth spurt, the elder McGee still towered above him. "You finally do something worthwhile, something worth being proud of, and you hide it?"

"Proud? You wouldn't be proud of me, you would have been proud of the fact that you had something to brag about. That's why I didn't tell you."

Thad grabbed his son tightly around his upper arms. It was the first time he had touched his son since the night of 'the incident'. He forced Tim back against the wall. "That's what children are for. They do things to make their parents proud, that's the way they say 'Thank-you' for everything the parents have done."

Tim was terrified, but this time it didn't stop him from saying what he felt. "Everything you've done for me? What would that be? The head slaps, telling me I'm worthless, being ignored … what Dad, what have you ever done for me?"

The elder McGee slammed his son against the wall. "You are worthless! You don't do anything that a son should. All that computer crap …"

"That computer crap is what I'm getting awards for!"

Thad paused, confusion then anger colored his face. "What!"

"Exactly Dad. That computer crap is the future, where I'm looking. When I join NIS …"

Thad slammed his son against the wall again. "NIS? You think that by joining the Navy's cops that's going to be enough to make up for you being the first McGee not to be in the Navy since it's inception?" Slam. "Do you really think someone like you could even get into NIS?" Slam. "Even they have standards!" Slam.

"Daddy! Stop it!" Sarah ran into Tim's room, jumped up and grabbed onto her Dad's arm. "Stop hurting Timmy!"

"Sarah, leave!"

"No Daddy! Not 'til you stop hurting him!"

He slammed his son once last time then let him go. Tim slid down the wall and pulled his knees to his chest.

"I don't even think you're _**my**_ son. Must have been switched at the hospital when you were born."

Tim didn't look up, trying very hard to hold the tears in, he pulled his knees closer to him.

"You don't deserve to be part of this family."

"Daddy, stop it! He's the bestest big brother! He keeps the monsters away at night, and reads to me, and … and …" Sarah made no attempt to hide her tears.

Thad scooped up his daughter. "No. He doesn't deserve anything from you.' He began walking out of Tim's room carrying a crying, screaming five-year old. "From now on you are not allowed around him. We will get you babysitters."

Thad slammed the door behind him, leaving Tim curled in a ball, shoulders shaking as he quietly cried.

~End Flashback~

Tim sighed at the memories, as he looked through all of the information they had up to this point.

Thad McGee didn't know it, but that confrontation started Sarah's rebellious streak that was still in full swing to this day. She never accepted any babysitter, she would turn into a holy terror for them. She dropped out of soccer and theater, changed every food she liked and disliked. In effect, becoming a completely different person.

From time to time she would sneak into Tim's room, but always made sure to be back in her room before morning. Tim was terrified at first about her getting caught, but he was glad his sister still loved him.

McGee smiled thinking of his sister, she was a handful, but he wouldn't have her any other way. By the time he turned sixteen and was ready to leave for MIT (he would have left sooner, but MIT didn't accept anyone younger at that time), their parents were just about ready to disown their daughter right along with their son.

When he wrecked his car, she was the only one who came and visited him in the hospital She was convinced that their Dad was trying to kill Tim, since he was the one who gave him the car. Watching a seven-year-old rant and rave about conspiracies was the highlight of his days in recovery.

Tim furrowed his brow in thought. That day was still a blur to him. He remembered being surprised that his parents would ever buy him anything, let alone a car. That was until he saw it. Yes, it would have been a smoking hot Camaro Z28, if it wasn't so totally beat up and dilapidated. He spent hours just getting the stupid thing to run without making an ear splitting noise. One of the few clear memories was the smug look on his Dad's face as Tim drove away. It was a dare to keep the car running. _'Since your so good with computers, you should be able to fix something as simple as a car.'_

It was a challenge he was willing to rise to, until he wrecked. It delayed his entrance into MIT for a couple of months, but Tim played catch up that entire first semester so that he could stay on track.

Once he was into the full swing of college, things got worse at home for Sarah. She started running away, usually getting caught at the Pennsylvania or Delaware border. By the time she was eight, all the local and state police knew her by name and every route she would take trying to get to her brother. When she turned nine, the authorities stepped-in saying the McGee's needed to find a compromise because they couldn't spend all their time looking for the same run away every week.

The compromise had come in the form of Grandma Davis, their mom's mom. She lived in Edison, New Jersey, which was almost exactly half way between Bethesda and MIT. Sarah moved in with her and peace was restored … mostly.

Tim smiled again. Sarah stayed with Grandma Davis until she was ready to go to college at Waverly, even when he ended up in Baltimore going to John's Hopkins. Through everything, Sarah had stuck by her brother, and he by her.

_Sarah never allowed them to change her feelings or to substitute me_. McGee grinned at himself, but the grin quickly fell as a memory started niggling at him. _Wait, substitute … what does it mean. Come on, think!_ He pulled up the report from yesterday where he listed all of the scars and where they came from.

_That is when I first thought something was wrong. What is it … what is it …_ Tim was getting no where, so he went back over the victim reports. _That first victim still didn't fit the pattern. Theodore wasn't there when I was shoved into the locker. Wait, locker … substitute … aw, hell._ McGee hung his head. _Why didn't I get this before? Theodore, you …_

McGee now understood and knew exactly what he needed to do. He raised his head and took a quick look around. The two airmen were standing by the elevators, and the team was going to be gone for hours, he had enough time to get the program up and running.

He took a deep breath and got started.


	24. Chapter 24

I'm glad you guys liked my last chapter. I have always wondered why Tim and Sarah were so close since there is such an age gap. I am an only child, but most brothers & sisters I knew growing up tried to stay as far away from each other as they could. However, I really like the idea of the overprotective older sibling. Since we know Tim isn't any good with babies, there had to be some other reason for their closeness. (And it fit for this story ... don't ya love how that happens ... lol).

Disclaimer: I own nothing of NCIS and am not making any money.

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><p>A thirty-minute ride brought the team to a run down and basically abandoned neighborhood. It was going to be a new housing development for the underprivileged, until the funding fell through. Now, it was a place of half built homes and the hiding place for anyone who wanted to get lost.<p>

Roger looked around and sighed._ How did Mark fall this far? What the hell happened to him?_

Gibbs eyed Roger, knowing it must be hard to think that his childhood friend ended up in an area like this. Gibbs focused back on the road, remembering that they were looking for one of Tim's tormenters. They came to the end of a row. "There it is. Everyone be on guard."

They all nodded at Gibbs.

Tony and Ziva went to the back, Roger and Gibbs to the front. Guns drawn, they entered at the same time finding … nothing. As 'clear' sounded through out the small house, DiNozzo came storming towards his boss. "Is Fornell sure this is the address?"

Gibbs was going to respond until he heard Ziva call out. "Got a body in here."

The three men followed the sound of Ziva's voice into a small bedroom.

"Well, what's left of a body anyways." DiNozzo quipped as they all looked at the remains laying on the floor.

"I'm no ME, but that body looks more than three months old."

"You're right Sergeant Ferris, you're not an ME." Gibbs glared. More angry that this led was a dead-end, literally, as he put his gun away and pulled out his cell phone. "Duck, we need your services. Everyone is okay, the body's been here for awhile. Oh, and Ducky, don't let McGee know you're heading out here. I'll tell him once we know for sure what we've got." Gibbs closed his phone while Doctor Mallard was still asking questions.

While Gibbs was calling Ducky, Tony had gone back to the car to grab a camera and a kit, and Ziva searched the room. There was something off about the floor molding, years of Mossad training told her something was hiding behind that molding. She wanted to start prying it apart, but years of NCIS training told her to wait until Tony returned with a camera and gloves.

DiNozzo came back and started taking photos of the body. Ziva grabbed gloves and Tony's arm. "I need you over here."

Tony smiled. "Well, Ziva, I'm glad that you finally admitted you need me. However, I don't think this is the time or the place."

"Get your mind out of the rudder, Tony."

"Gutter."

"Whatever." Ziva rolled her eyes as she pulled him over to the section of the floor molding that had grabbed her attention. "Take a photo of this."

Tony saw right away the odd section of molding. After he took the pictures, Ziva started pulling it apart and found a secret compartment, containing a flash memory device.

"We should get this back to …"

"Abby." Gibbs cut Tony off.

"Boss?"

"I want to know what's on that thing before we present it to Tim."

"You do not believe he will be strong enough to handle the information?"

Gibbs shook his head. "Its not that Ziva. How would you feel if what we found on that thing was a plan to kill you, or worse." He let that soak in for a moment. "Tim will know everything we know, I just want to know it first."

Tony and Ziva glanced at each other, then back to their boss and nodded.

Gibbs, satisfied with their unspoken agreement, gave a small nod. "Alright, let's keep processing this house. We might find more than one hiding place."

The three NCIS agents went about their normal procedure. Roger stood over the body and let his thoughts wonder.

"I guarantee you, he's not going anywhere."

Roger shook his head. "What if this is Mark, Agent DiNozzo?"

"Then I guess it narrows down who to look for."

Roger turned towards Tony, but didn't have a chance to respond, as Ziva walked into the room.

"That would mean McGee's instincts were correct about it being Nathaniel."

"They usually are Ziva."

She stopped dead in her tracks. "You are admitting that?"

"Hey, just because I give him a hard time, doesn't mean I doubt him. How many times when we're stuck, he's the one who finds the right piece of evidence or information to send us back in the right direction."

Ziva shook her head. "I never would have thought …"

"Aw, come on Ziva. I'm not cold-hearted."

A look passed between the two. They seemed to finally come to an understanding about yesterday's events.

Gibbs walked past the door. "If you two are done, get back to work."

Ziva and Tony smiled at each other and said in union, "Yes Boss!"

Gibbs walked outside to wait for Ducky, allowing himself a small smile for a moment. His smile faded as he looked down at the evidence bag holding the memory device, worrying about what new piece of the puzzle this would bring.

XXXX

Tim had the program finished, the next step was to test how much of a gap he would get when the time came. He got up and went to the men's room, and noticed the airmen did not follow. He decided to make other movements through NCIS, but he was very careful to keep his movements regular: bathroom, break room, MTAC, nothing out of the ordinary. _They probably think I'm safe in here. Let's see how much leeway they give me._

Now came the time to push their limits. Tim stood, catching the attention of Airman Williams. "I'm heading down to Abby's lab. I should be back in about ten minutes."

Williams nodded at him, but did not move from his spot at the external elevators.

McGee nodded back and crossed over to the internal elevators and actually went down to Abby. On the way, he started at timer on his watch.

XXXX

She had not heard from the team either, but assured him this was normal when they were out at a scene.

He took a casual look and his watch and when the timer reached nine minutes and thirty seconds, he told Abby that he wanted to check in with Ducky. However, when he got to autopsy, it was empty. _They must have gotten a call out._ As he thought, a bit of unease passed through McGee when he considered that Ducky was needed for his team. He shook it off as he walked back out, deciding where else he could go. A slight smile crossed his face, knowing the perfect place to hide.

When he walked through the door to Cyber-crimes, he was met with a chorus of "Boss!"

Tim smiled as Joan, the head of the division, walked up to him. "I'm not the boss anymore. Right, Joan."

"Oh, you'll always be the boss down here, Tim." She smiled back. Joan was almost a foot shorter and twenty years older than McGee. However, she was a force to be reckoned with, full of fire and as up to date as any of the younger geeks in her unit, she could hold her own against any expert.

"I hope that doesn't bother you."

"Not at all, I would be glad to have you back." None of the other geeks could understand why McGee wanted to be a field agent. "So, what brings you back to the dungeon?"

Tim chuckled. "We're slow up there, so I thought ..."

Joan lit up, "Oh, of course Tim! You know we always have something for you! In fact ..." Joan grabbed Tim's arm and started explaining the problems they were having back tracing some recent hacking attempts, while she pulled him over to his 'honorary' desk.

Tim hated to deceive his old co-workers like this, but he was glad this was something he had done from time to time. He took a quick look at his watch, he was gone fifteen minutes now. _Let's see how long it takes for them to come and find me_, he thought as he let himself become lost the work.

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><p>Ooo, the plot thickens. Sorry about the shorter chapter, but it jut had to be. There is a lot that is going to start happening. Maybe if you're good readers, I'll post the next chapter later today. Evil Grin<p> 


	25. Chapter 25

Since the last chapter was short and I got a pretty please (Flowerfairy30 this is for you!), I decided to post the next chapter. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: NCIS doesn't belong to me - although I wish!

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><p>Airman Williams was getting worried. He glanced at his watch, McGee had been gone for twenty-five minutes, fifteen more than he had said. He looked over to Airman Masterson and exchanged an anxious look. Williams grabbed the next agent that walked past. "Excuse me, sir? I was wondering if you could take me down to an 'Abby's Lab'.<p>

Agent Brooks looked the Airman up and down, it was the same one whom he had followed the day he went out after Agent McGee. "Why?"

"Agent McGee said he would be back from there in ten minutes, it's been twenty-five."

Brooks gave a knowing smile. "Abby probably roped him into helping her with something. I wouldn't worry." Everyone in the building knew of the special friendship between Abby and McGee. They all also knew that he was the only one _**ever**_ allowed to work in the lab, with or without Abby present.

Williams gave him a doubtful look. "Still ..."

Brooks realized these airmen were taking their protection detail very seriously, and he was glad to see it. "Alright, come on." He motioned with his hand as he walked away, expecting the airman to follow.

It took Williams a few moments to realize he was being asked to follow the agent. He quickly caught up to Brooks at the inner elevator. The ride to the lab was quiet. When they walked in, Brooks raised his voice to be heard above the music, while Williams cringed.

Abby bounced over to the two men. "Hey Shane, what's up? Got a case for me?"

Brooks shook his head and pointed a thumb over his shoulder to the airman. "Nope, just got a bodyguard looking for his body to guard."

Abby looked over Brooks' shoulder to the airman. "Timmy's not here." She frowned at first and then smiled, "Oh, he said he was going to talk to Ducky. I bet the Duck-man is talking his ears off. He is so polite, he never cuts off Ducky during a story, he usually has to be rescued. Come on, I'll take you to autopsy."

"That's alright Abby, I got him."

"No problem Shane. I don't have anything going on right now." She pushed past them, taking the lead out of the lab.

Williams gave a question look to Brooks. He just shrugged and followed Abby out, with Williams closely behind.

Abby was going a mile a minute about how Ducky can talk and talk, while the two men exchanged smirks. However, the smiling and talking stopped when they arrived to a quiet autopsy.

Williams turned to Brooks. "I'm going to need a security check of the building."

The agent was going to protest, until he remember they were talking about one of Gibbs' boys. If something had happened to him and they didn't take every measure possible to find out what, Gibbs would skin them alive. He nodded to the airman and took out his cell phone.

"Wait, wait, wait ..." Abby was nervous, she didn't want to think something could have happened to Tim in the short amount of time that he had left.

"Abby, listen, the sooner we figure out where Agent McGee went, the sooner we can ..."

Brooks didn't get to finish his statement as Abby let out a squeal. "Oh, I bet I know where he wondered off to! Come on!" She again, took the lead with the two men following behind.

"Abby, I'm not so sure about this, the longer we wait ..."

"I know, but if we sound the alarm and Timmy is where I think he is, he is going to be sooooooo embarrassed. I don't want him any more upset than he already is."

"Miss Scuito ..."

She rounded on the two of them. "No! This first, then if he isn't there you can call in the troops and lock-down every building from here to the FBI. But only after."

Brooks and Williams exchanged a look but nodded to Abby in agreement. She turned back around, getting herself under control. _You better be there Timmy, because if your not, I'm going to kill you ... once we get you back safe and sound._

As Abby opened the door to Cyber-crimes, she called out, "Marco ..."

She received four responses of "Polo". She frowned until one of the techs stood up and pointed to a figure completely engrossed in the screen in front of him.

Abby paused and put her arms up to stop the two men behind her. She took a moment to look over her friend, and her smile returned. He looked so calm and focus, back to his old self. When she didn't find Tim in autopsy, she had started to worry, but then she took a moment to put herself in his shoes. She would want everything as close to normal as possible. Which would mean back to work, and since he didn't have anything going on upstairs, Cyber-crimes had always offered a place for him to go to keep his mind and skills sharp.

She was brought out of her thoughts when McGee started chanting, "Come on, come on, come on."

After another moment he jumped up and yelled, "Yes! Joan, I got it!" He took a moment to look around, triumph written all over his face. Then he noticed Abby and the two men behind her and his face fell. "Oh, ah ... Hi?"

Tim lowered his head and took a quick look at the computer, it was thirty minutes since he left the bull-pen, twenty past his time. He kept his head down. "How long have you guys been standing there?"

Abby took his reaction as embarrassment. "Oh, just a couple of minutes." She was smiling and thought about teasing him, but decided he had been through enough lately and let him off easy. "It was nice seeing you have fun."

Tim lifted his head and gave a small smile and nodded to Abby. "It was nice to be back to normal, for ... how long was I down here?" He hoped his little misnomer about not know the time would be taken for embarrassment instead of the lie it was. He hated to lie, but the stakes were too high, he knew what needed to be done and that he was the only one who could do it. It was his responsibility to stop this; not his team, not the Air Force, not even Roger.

Abby opened her mouth to respond when Joan came walking over. "Great job Tim!" She took a moment to look over his work. "It was hidden in the data stream from the overseas offices ...hm, that's cleaver, how did you think to look there?" She straightened back up and looked, with pride, at McGee.

He shrugged. "Hiding in plain sight. It's what criminals do best." Now he was embarrassed for real.

Joan walked over to McGee. "That's a good job. It might have taken us a while to think of that." She eyed him up and down. "You know, if you ever get tired of being a field agent, we would all love to have you back. Right guys?"

Abby, Brooks and Williams looked around as "Yes", "Anytime", "Please come back Boss", and many other responses echoed around the unit.

McGee, blushing furiously, put an arm around Joan's shoulder and gave her quick squeeze. She reminded him a lot of Matt's mother, full of spirit. "This is your unit now. I'm where I belong."

She gave him a frown. "You think of things we never would, you could do more good here." During his time at Cyber-crimes, they all had grown fond of Tim. Even though it was years later, the unit would gladly welcome him back.

"I think of those things because I'm a field agent. Maybe you should draft an exchange program. Every team gets a cyber-geek, so they can know what I know."

Joan sighed, she had this conversation with Tim every time he came down to help and she knew she would never persuade him. However, that didn't mean she wouldn't keep trying. "I don't think any of us would be able to know what you know. Besides, can you see Matthews or West handling a gun?"

The two techs in question gave a resounding, simultaneous, "No way!" Causing everyone to laugh.

Everyone, except Abby. She didn't like the thought of Tim leaving Team Gibbs, even if it would be an assignment in the same building. She walked over and slipped an arm through McGee's. "You ready to go." She said gently to him, but gave a glare to Joan.

Tim sighed. "Play nice you two. There's more than enough of me to go around." He gave a quick squeeze to Joan's shoulder again and then left with Abby.

Joan watched as he left. "That's where you're wrong Tim." She shook her head. "Alright everyone, the excitement is over. Matthews, pick up where Tim left off. I think he did most of it, you just need to follow through."

"Me? Follow after The Boss?"

Joan smiled, Matthews was new when McGee had been head of Cyber-crimes. He took to Tim immediately and had a hero worship going on, that if left alone, could stunt the boy's career. He was good, almost as good as Tim. Then again, they were all almost as good. "Yes, you Matthews. You worked with Tim pretty closely when he was stationed down here. I think you'd be the best to follow his lead."

"Yes Ma'am!" Matthews said with pride as he took over the computer, giving a moment's respect before starting.

Joan shook her head, but smiled, knowing he would be more confident now. "Alright, the rest of you geeks, back to work!", she playfully yelled to her unit.

They all smiled, gave a "Yes, Ma'am", and bowed their heads back to their computers.

XXXX

Abby pouted all the way to the bull-pen, holding onto McGee's arm the entire time.

"Abs, I'm not going to make a run for it."

"It's not that McGee. You won't go back to cyber-crimes will you? I mean I know you're great down there, and everyone really likes you ... but we all really like you and you're a great agent, and ..."

Tim smiled and leaned over to give her a kiss to the top of her head. "Don't worry, I'm not going any where. Like I said down there, I'm where I belong."

Abby sighed happily and rested her head against McGee's shoulder, being careful not to squeeze too hard in case it freaked him out again.

Tim looked at Agent Brooks and Airman Williams. "I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to make anyone worry. I just wanted a bit of normalcy." _And to see how much I could get away with_, he added to himself.

Williams looked over the man in front of him. He remembered when Sergeant Ferris had started talking about McGee at the beginning of this assignment. He had sounded like a caricature, no one could really be that good of a person. But, each time he was around McGee, he could see what Roger did, someone who truly cared and wanted to do some good in this world. Even he started to feel protective of the agent in his care.

Williams nodded to him. "I can understand that. But you need to understand that you need to take your protection seriously. We don't know how far this killer's reach goes. He could get to you even here."

Tim nodded solemnly.

"Just don't let it happen again. If you get the urge to go somewhere else, or even if you get called away, let one of us know - no exceptions. If there is a repeat performance, you will have a shadow every where you go. I do mean every where. Are we clear?"

McGee nodded. "Yes, sir. Very." He sighed and lowered his head. _He gave me fifteen minutes this time. Next time I will probably only have ten. Okay, so that will give me a twenty-five to thirty minute head start. It will just have to be enough. Now, how am I going to leave the building?_

Everyone took Tim's lowered head as him being resigned and unhappy. Abby glared at the two men.

Brooks and Williams glanced at each other, but they knew the airman was right.

"Hey, your team will get him. Don't you worry. You guys aren't the MCRT for nothing. All of us other teams have some pretty high standards to measure up to." Brooks gave in his most confident voice.

McGee's shoulders slumped for a moment, but then he lifted back up. He looked at each of the men in the eyes. "You're right. I guess I'm being a little selfish here. Everyone is working so hard and I'm just wallowing. My team's the best, no offense Brooks, I just need to give them the time to figure this out."

The elevator doors opened into bull-pen. Abby still held onto Tim's arm as they walked to his desk. "Your not being selfish. You're doing amazing! Don't be so hard on yourself."

McGee smiled at her as she finally let go of his arm as he sat at his desk. Williams went back to the outside elevators, speaking briefly to Masterson.

Brooks nodded to McGee and went back to his own team.

Abby jumped up and took a seat on the edge of McGee's desk.

He looked at her and smiled. "Abby you don't have to watch me. I'm not going to run off."

"That's okay McGee. I don't have anything going on right now. Besides, I like watching you at your desk ... where you belong."

Tim gave a genuine smile. "Okay, Abs. Stay as long as you want then."

Abby smiled back and nodded. Tim got back to his searches for Mark and Nate. Abby sat, swinging her legs on the edge of his desk, waiting for the rest of the team to return.


	26. Chapter 26

Gibbs' mind was mulling over just what he should tell Tim. He sighed, knowing the young man would want the truth, no matter what. It now was a decision of just how much of the truth to tell him.

When the elevator doors opened, Gibbs nodded to the two airmen and Roger paused to speak with his men. Gibbs came to a stop when he walked in the bull-pen. "Abs? Wha'cya doing up here?" He worried something else had happen while the team was gone.

Abby looked up at the sound of Gibbs' voice. "Oh, hey Bossman! I was bored and decided to come keep Timmy company." She pushed off of the desk and skipped up to Gibbs. "Do you guys have anything for me?"

Gibbs looked between Abby and Tim. Everything seemed okay, but he could tell something was up by the way Tim's ears reddened. He was going to push, but decided against it, since they were in the middle of the bull-pen. However, once they got home he would find out exactly what had gone on.

"Yeah, Abby. In fact, Tony and Ziva are heading towards your lab. So ..."

She gave Gibbs a quick hug and turned around in military fashion. "I'm off! See you later McGee!"

Tim shook his head at her. "Later!" He looked at his boss and could tell something had happened. "What did you guys find? Was Mark there? Is he involved?"

"With me McGee." Gibbs jerked his head towards the elevator and started walking.

Tim scrambled to catch up to his boss, while trying to control the unease settling in his stomach. _Oh, no! This must be bad if Gibbs wants to talk to me alone._

Once in the elevator, neither said anything until Gibbs flipped the emergency switch. He eyed McGee carefully, then sighed. "We found a body." He held up his hands before McGee could start with more questions. "We don't have a positive ID yet. The body was badly decomposed, Ducky's estimate is at least six to seven month old."

Tim sagged against the wall. "That was before all of this started. So, if it is Mark, then he wouldn't have anything to do with this."

Gibbs rubbed his palms against his pants leg, trying to decided how much to tell his agent. "That's not necessarily true, Tim."

McGee looked up at him. "What do you mean?"

Gibbs sighed again. "We found a flash drive that was very carefully hidden in floor molding."

McGee's eyes actually lit up. "Where is it? I should ..."

"No."

"Boss?"

"I don't want you anywhere near that thing until I know exactly what's on it."

"But ..."

"Don't make me repeat myself McGee."

Tim slumped back against the elevator wall again. "You don't think I can handle it."

Gibbs rubbed the bridge of his nose. "It's not that ..."

"It's okay. I understand. I wouldn't have much faith in me right now either."

That made Gibbs angry. He took the one step to cross over to his agent and grabbed his arms. "Look at me McGee. What did I tell you in the park?"

Tim looked at his boss, trying to read the expression on his face. "What?"

"What. Did. I. Tell. You?"

They had talked about so much that day, McGee wasn't sure exactly which part Gibbs was referring to. "I don't ... I mean there was so much ... we talked about a lot."

"I told you that I would protect you and make sure no one hurts you again. Remember?"

Tim nodded. "I remember, but what does ..."

"How would you feel, if on that thing, we find detailed plans of these crimes. Or whatever sick reasoning this person has for doing this. Or, details on how to get to you ... or your friends." Gibbs watched as Tim paled. "Exactly. That is why I want you to wait."

"I just ... I mean ..."

"Tim, listen to me. I know that you've never had this before, but let us watch out for you. Okay?"

Gibbs was holding him, just like his dad had done all those years ago. But this felt different. It wasn't angry or reproachful, instead, it was supportive. Tim could clearly see the worry in the ice blue eyes that were studying him. "Okay Boss."

Gibbs gave a small smile, nodded and released Tim. "Alright. Have you been able to find anything else?"

McGee stood straighter and shook his head. "I'm running into some brick walls. The P.O. box was the only thing I could find on Mark and Nate ... its like he's dropped off the face of the earth." He looked at his boss and tentatively asked, "How about Fornell? Did he find anything else?"

"Not yet."

"You really called in a favor for me?"

Gibbs gave a head-slap as his answer.

"Thanks, Boss."

Gibbs reached over and re-started the elevator. "Get back to work, McGee."

"Yes, Boss." Tim grinned as he rubbed the back of his head. He stepped out of the elevator, but Gibbs didn't. "Boss?"

"Going to see Abby. Stay in the bull-pen. Understand?"

"Yes." Tim watched as the doors closed on his smirking boss. _Gibbs is doing so much for me, maybe I should ... No! This is my responsibility, Rule 45: Clean up your own mess. I can't have any of them getting hurt because of me._

He went back to his desk, and now that he was alone, he pulled the floor plan for the building and started planning his escape route.

XXXX

As Gibbs traveled down to Abby, he thought back over the encounter with McGee. When he grabbed Tim, he could see fear flash in those expressive green eyes. _Did his father do something similar? Did I just remind him of that miserable excuse of a parent?_ Gibbs was kicking himself, until he realized that McGee had relaxed in his grip and really listened.

Gibbs smiled to himself. _Now that's more like it!_ He walked into a music filled lab. "Abby!"

She turned down the music. "Hey, El Magnifico! I haven't even gotten started on the flash drive."

"I know." He looked around. "Where are Tony and Ziva?"

"Went to talk to Ducky and to get samples for me so that I can start running DNA."

"Good. Abs, when you get the information off that thing, call me immediately."

"I will, once I get past this password. Ugh, I should have Timmy ..."

"No, Abby."

"But ..."

"I just had this conversation with McGee. I get to know first. Period."

"That's not possible."

"Abby ..."

"I mean I'll get into the file and read it and then I'll let you know that I'm into the file and reading it. So you'd be the second to know."

Gibbs smiled and placed a kiss on the Goth's temple. "Guess you're right."

She smiled back at her silver fox. "Although, I hate to admit it, but I might need a little help with this. Is it okay if I used someone from Cyber-crimes?"

"Sure. Just keep its exposure limited. We don't know what's on it and I don't want the whole building to know before we do."

"You got it, El Jefe!"

Gibbs shook his head as he went to join the rest of his team in autopsy.

XXXX

Gibbs walked into autopsy coming to a stop between Tony and Ziva. "What do you have for me Duck?"

Before Ducky could start, Tony had a question. "How'd he take it boss?"

Gibbs looked at all of the expectant faces. "How do you think?"

"That good, hun?" Tony sighed and looked back at the ME.

"Ah, yes, when it comes to a case, Timothy doesn't like to sit on the sidelines. I can ..."

"Duck, what did you find?"

"Well, as you can imagine, it is hard to get much from a six month old corpse. At least not without many tests and I have not had much time with our friend. However, from what I can tell, it looks as though our boy here has been stabbed in the back several times, from the markings on the ribs."

"Any indication of sexual assault?"

"Not so far."

DiNozzo looked at Ducky quizzically. "So far?"

"With a body this decomposed, those type of tests will take longer and I cannot guarantee a result, one way or the other."

Gibbs nodded. "Understood, what does you're profiling suggest?"

"Well, I would say that he would not have been assaulted."

"Why?" Ziva questioned.

"If this is indeed Mark Siebel, then he would be unworthy of such treatment."

"Unworthy?" Tony said with disgust.

"Remember, this assailant is reliving a memory, trying to recapture a feeling. Mr. Siebel would not be a substitute for Timothy, rather he would be a hindrance. A threat that needed removed before the perpetrator's ultimate plan could begin."

They all paused for a moment of silence for the victims of the 'ultimate plan'. Ziva was the first to break the silence. "Now what?"

Ducky gave Jimmy several sample jars. "Now I shoo you out of here while I conduct my formal autopsy and Mr. Palmer delivers those samples to Abigail." Jimmy nodded and quickly left. "By tomorrow morning, we should know everything about our John Doe."

"Tomorrow?" Gibbs grumbled.

"I'm afraid so, Jethro. As good as the technology is now a days, it still requires time."

"Time for another victim to be placed on Tim's shoulders."

Ducky sighed. "I understand, but rushing will get us nothing but false leads and shoddy information. None of us wants that. We just need to make sure that Timothy knows we will support him."

Tony spoke for the group. "No problem there."

Ducky gave the senior field agent a smiled. "Good, Anthony. Now if you will excuse us, I have a cadaver with whom I need to get to acquainted."

The team nodded and left.

Ducky turned to the remains. "Alright sir, let us find out what secrets you may be hiding."

XXXX

The day wore on and on, with none thing coming of it. Finally at 1330 hours, Gibbs hit his frustration point. He slammed the phone down on Fornell and yell to his team. "Does anybody have anything?"

He got a resounding, "No, Boss.", from all. He stood and walked over to McGee, placing a hand on the back of his chair and leaning over his shoulder. "You have got to have found something McGee! You've been typing away all day!"

Tim had quickly hidden the widow he actually had up when he saw Gibbs stand. He knew the man too well and knew he was always the first one Gibbs looked to when answers were slim to none. He sighed. "I've been trying to find out how many people just 'disappeared' and also people who just mysteriously appeared around the same time frame as Mark, er ah, the John Doe."

Gibbs looked at him questioningly.

"Mark disappeared and Charlie showed up. I'm trying to see if there is anyone else that seems to fit the same pattern. I'm starting from the local area and expanding out ward."

Gibbs gave a small smile. "That's good thinking. Have you found anything?"

McGee have a long sigh. "Yeah, too many." He pulled up the long list of names he had found and scrolled through it for Gibbs.

"I think you can eliminate some of these, they're women."

However, McGee shook his head. "What if its something like Lt. Commander Voss?"

"Who?" Ziva asked.

"Before your time." Gibbs stood straight. "Maybe we should give DiNozzo the list of women while you and David take the men."

McGee snickered and Tony lost all color to his face. "Um, Boss?"

"Yes, DiNozzo?"

Tony looked panicked. "I don't think that's such a good idea."

"Oh. Why not."

Tim let out a muffled laugh, trying very hard not to guffaw out loud.

Ziva looked from McGee to DiNoozo. "Yes, please explain. You are usually the first one to take the lead on questioning any female."

Tony was desperately trying to see if his boss was joking. _Gibbs? Joke? No way! Oh, man._ "Not this time Ziva."

Ziva opened her mouth to ask if Tony was undercover again, when Tim's laughter filled the bullpen. She looked at him and Gibbs. Tim was laughing so hard, he was actually crying and Gibbs, well, he would never out right laugh, be he was smiling wide with a rarely seen light in his eyes. She smiled at them and turned back to DiNozzo, her smile became predatory. "If Gibbs thinks you would be the best to handle questioning these women, then I do not see the issue."

"The issue? The issue is ... well ... you see ..."

"Yes, DiNozzo."

"Boss, I just ... I ..."

Tim wiped his eyes with his sleeve. "It was the one time Tony had just as bad luck in picking a woman as I do."

Ziva became a little sad at McGee putting himself down. "McGee ..."

Tim however, was still fully enjoying himself. "Turns out she was a he."

"What?" Ziva looked at Gibbs then at Tony. "How ... when did you find out?"

Tony tried to respond to defend himself as Tim fell into a fit of renewed laughter. It was Gibbs who finished the story. "After he had kissed her, him, her."

Ziva was stunned for a moment and then started snorting and then laughing right along with McGee.

"Hey! I had to take one for the case ... for the team ..." Tony was trying to keep some semblance of dignity as he straighten out his suit jacket, but was failing. "I knew all along ... she/he/it didn't fool me at all ..." He was muttering to himself as he went back to his computer pretending to be following a lead of his own.

Gibbs just shook his head and went back to his desk. As he sat down, he realized how rare it was to hear Tim laugh, a true heart-felt laugh. He was usually the butt of the joke, and the very few times the situation was reversed, Tim always kept himself controlled. As if, he always had to be careful of how he presented himself to others. _I wonder if that is something else that sorry excuse of a father taught him._

"Alright you three back to work. McGee keep working on that list, you might just find something."

"Yes Boss" was now the answer all around.

XXXX

Two hours later, Gibbs took a look around at his team. They were desperately trying to find ... something. He also noticed another one of the nutritional shakes sitting on McGee's desk and realized he never call lunch. He was kicking himself and took a breath to remedy that situation when his phone rang. "Gibbs. Alright, we'll be right down."

He stood. "Abby has gotten into the flash drive. DiNozzo, David, and Staff Sergeant Ferris with me. McGee, keep working on that list."

They all nodded, but Tim felt strange to be left behind. He sighed as he watched the four of them leave and looked at his list. _This is hopeless! I need more parameters to narrow this down._ He huffed and sat back in his chair and thought over what he knew. He realized what was wanted of him. _The only thing I haven't figured out is where it will all go down. I know I just have to wait for the next cell phone call, but that will mean another victim. Come on, think McGee! Okay, the 'substitute' took place while I was stuck in a locker, but it wasn't a school locker, so where was it?_

He decided to pull a map from his old home town to see if anything would trigger a memory.


	27. Chapter 27

This is a long chapter. I was going to split it, but I didn't want to break the flow of the story, plus I know how you all feel about short chapters!  
>I am not military and the only stuff I know comes from the TV show I watch, so if I messed up anything (which I'm sure I did), please be forgiving!<p>

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from NCIS, just my own created for the story.

* * *

><p>As the four of them entered the lab, a short older woman was leaving. She paused at the door and looked Gibbs up and down. She leaned into his personal space. "You better take good care of that boy. You hear me?"<p>

Gibbs looked down at the woman. "Don't worry Joan, I will."

"If you don't I will petition Direct Vance to get him back, whether you, or he, likes it or not!" She gave him one last hard look and then left.

Tony, Ziva, and Roger turned their head to watch as she left. When they looked back at Abby, it was Ziva who spoke. "Who was that?"

Abby actually had a soft smile. "That was Joan from Cyber-crimes. She really wants Timmy back and after reading this ..." Her smile fell. "... let's just say I can't blame her for wanting to keep him close."

"What do you have for us, Abs?"

"Well, like I said, there was a password on the flash drive and since I couldn't ask Timmy for help, I went to Joan." She paused and looked directly at Gibbs. "Don't worry Gibbs, she knows to keep quiet. She was able to figure out the password by ..."

"I think we can skip that part." Gibbs cut her off before she could really build steam. "What was on it."

Abby paused took a deep calming breath and started. "It's a diary. I'm almost one-hundred percent sure that it was for Mark Siebel because it details a Marine's experiences on three tours during 'Operation Enduring Freedom'. Most of it is the usual soldier stuff, his squadrons, his missions, the people he met, so on."

"Three deployments? How did you find anything so quickly?" Gibbs asked.

"By looking for key words. I entered Charlie and was taken to the very last deployment.

**August**

**4 - Our squad was sent to this little village half way between home base and where we believe the insurgents' base camp is. It didn't really have a name any more because it had changed hands so many times. The people there were just trying to live their daily lives. It makes me wonder if we have lost sight of why we came over here in the first place**

**10 - We met this kid from the village. None of us could get his name right. It sounded close to Charlie, so that is the name that stuck. First he just brought food and news about what might be going on, on the other side. But soon, he started trying to make us laugh. We didn't really know what to think of it at first. With the cultural difference, the jokes were lost on us. Until he decided to add some physical humor to it. One of the Sergeants said the kid reminded him of Charlie Chaplin, and the name stuck. From that point on, that is how we referred to him. He made the days seem a little less harsh and now I can remember the reason I am fighting.**

"That was the first time Charlie was mentioned." Abby informed them. "He actually writes about the kid quite often. He became kind of a squadron mascot. It is never mentioned how old 'Charlie' is, but everyone felt safe to have him around."

"Okay, so how does this tie into anything?" DiNozzo asked, wanting to get to the punch line.

"You'll see. I'm going to jump ahead six months.

**February**

**20 - Most of the squad, including me, were out following a false led. It was a diversion to get most of us away from camp, away from the village. When we got the distress call, we came back as quickly as we could, but it wasn't fast enough. Almost everyone that was left behind was dead and the village was pretty much wiped out. We desperately looked for survivors. I happened to be the one who found Charlie. He was alive, but had been beaten and tortured. He was unconscious and I carried him all the way back to the camp hospital, letting him know it was going to be okay.**

**23 - It's been three days since the attack, we were able to save about fifty people, combined between our squad that was left behind and the villagers. The mood here has definitely darkened. The villagers who used to tolerate or even enjoy our presence, now look at us with anger and malice. The soldiers that survived carry guilt that they could not have done more, and those of us that were away are trying to figure out how we didn't know it was all a trap.**

**The worst though is Charlie. I went to see him and had to have a female escort. When I asked why, I was told that he is no longer comfortable around men. I thought this odd and that it must be a mistake. I knew I was wrong the moment I walked into his tent. His once youthful face has turned cold and the light that once shone in his eyes was gone. When I tried to get close to him, he back away from me and hid behind his bed. When I asked him what was wrong, he just yelled for me to leave. The nurse took me outside and explained what had happened to him. I think I threw up and went back to my tent, but I don't remember clearly.**

**24 - I had to find out why Charlie had received such a terrible punishment. I don't put a lot past these insurgents, but this is an unusual act, even for them. I found another survivor who had been with Charlie when it happened. She was reluctant to talk to me, but after playing, let's make a deal and agreeing to take her along with us when we left the village, she finally started answering my questions. She said that one of the insurgents had been planted as a spy in the village. He had seen the way Charlie liked to entertain the troops and took offense. When they attacked him, they said if he wanted to whore himself to the Americans, then he would be treated like a whore. I was shocked. I gave her one of my dog tags and told her when the time came, I would come and get her.**

**I went back to my tent to think. Charlie had meant no one any harm, he just wanted people to laugh and he had a talent for it. If he were in another country, he would be on his way to becoming a famous comedian. But he was here, and punished for the gift of laughter. Punished for something that came naturally to him. As I thought of him, a memory started to come back to me. Long ago, I was the one punishing someone who was just doing what came naturally to him. I felt sick. I am no better than the people I am fighting against. I wonder if fate is trying to teach me something.**

**March**

**2 - Charlie killed himself yesterday. I couldn't write about it until the shock of it wore off. I was on my way to visit him, when I saw people running towards his tent. I got there just in time to hear him say that since he believed in nothing any more, he should not exist any more, and then he shot himself with a gun he had stolen from an MP. I am sitting here in my tent trying to make sense of it all, but failing. The more I think about it, the more I remember the kid from my past. Big green eyes, smart as hell, and alone. I was so jealous of how smart he was that I never stopped to realize how he must have felt. I remember the things I did to him, the things that I allowed to be done, but why can't I remember his name? I know that he is the reason I joined the military. So that I could prove that I was good person, so that I could help people, so that I could run away from my past. That is why I have taken so many tours over here. But I am done. I have done all the good I can (I think). It is time to stop running and make amends for the damage I have caused. When I get back to the states, I am going to find that green eyed, smart as hell, alone kid and take whatever justice he sees fit.**

Abby paused as tears threatened to fall. Gibbs walked up and put a hand on her far shoulder and pulled her into a side embrace. "It's just that Timmy affected people, even when he was just a target. I mean both Roger and Mark seemed to try to be good in order to make it up to Tim." She looked over at Roger. "I still can't forgive you for what you've done to him, but ... I mean ... am I right? Did you try to counter balance the bad you had done?

Roger nodded as he, Gibbs and DiNozzo remember the talk from the day before. "Yes, Ma'am. I joined the Air Force so that I could protect people where I had once failed. It seems that Mark did the same thing with the Marines. Your Agent McGee really affects those around him, even with out trying."

"Well, Abs, this at least proves the flash drive belongs to Mark Seible. Now all we need is the DNA confirmation. Have you gotten anything back yet." Gibbs said gently.

Abby shook her head and her pig tails hit him on the shoulder. "I should have the results in tomorrow. Even with the military, it still takes time to access the database and check the profiles." She quieted for a moment and then took a shaky breath. "There's more."

"What do you mean there's more?" Gibbs asked quietly.

Instead of saying anything, Abby just reached out and cued up the entries.

**Day 1**

**I'm back in the states. I've decided to leave the soldier behind in the desert. I've taken my friend's name, so Charlie Chaplin lives again. All I've thought about is finding that green eyed kid, still can't remember his name, but I did remember a name, Theodore McGrory. He is not the kid I am looking for, in fact, he was the ring leader of our group - mean, vicious and merciless. He is at least a place to start.**

**Day 15**

**I found Theo, no that's not right - Theodore, is now living in a max security prison, no surprise there. It is going to be a little difficult getting in to see him since I have no ID anymore, living off the grid so to speak (the things you learn from terrorists). But I will find a way. I have to!**

**Day 48**

**I got to see him. What a terrible experience! At first, it was fine, just like old friends catching up. Theodore would smile and laugh, and he was really easy to talk to, until ... Until I mentioned trying to remember the green eyed kid we used to bully. The transformation that took place, I swear, only happens in movies. His eyes darkened and his face twisted. He told me that if I couldn't remember on my own, that I didn't deserve to remember at all. He couldn't believe that I would forget the one perfect being on the planet. That the time of 'Final Reckoning' was approaching and that if I wanted to be part of the 'Ultimate Destiny' then I had to remember on my own. If I could remember in time, I would get to be witness to something truly amazing.**

**With that he left the visitor cell. My head is still reeling. All that talk sounded like something out of a comic book! But it did bring back some memories: Theodore talking about his counter-part, his other half. Separate, but always connected. Creepy.**

**Day 81**

**As hard as I try, the only thing I can remember are those big green eyes. I'm going to need help.**

**Day 85**

**I've tracked down an old friend from school, Jerry. His family was part of the Marines too, so we always seemed to end up on the same bases. We went from kindergarten through high school graduation together, if anyone can help me remember it's him.**

**Day 90**

**Jerry wanted to know why I was trying to track down someone I used to bully. I told him so that I could make amends. I didn't let him know anything about Theodore, better to keep any potential collateral damage to a minimum. After hours and hours of going through his old years books, we found him! I kept skipping over his name and face, guess I still don't want to face up to what I have done. Jerry realized that I was skipping and pointed the kid out to me. Man, how could I have forgotten Timothy McGee. Quiet, painfully shy, so smart he skipped a grade, he ... he was also ignored by his parents. Looking back now, I had nothing to be jealous of, my parents were great, my grades were above average and I had friends. Tim had no one, only his smarts to get him through. I wonder what he's made of himself? I will keep looking for him, but I must get back to Theodore and see if he will now confide in me his about his 'Final Reckoning' and 'Ultimate Destiny'.**

**Day 182**

**When I told Theodore Tim's name, he lit up like a Christmas tree. He said he was proud of me and that I had earned my place in the 'Ultimate Destiny'. He starting talking ... all about Tim: his car accident, his college days, odd jobs, getting accepted to FLETC, being a Federal Agent, an author, all the women he's dated ... and so much more. The level of information he has on Tim is scary, its like ... its like he is seeing everything through Tim's eyes. I know that doesn't make any sense. The worst part is that he still hasn't told me his plan. Said he need to test my resolve, that if I really want to know, I will show up in thirteen days, then and only then will he reveal all. Maybe I will find Tim within that time and I can let him know what Theodore has planned for him.**

**Day 195**

**I think the guards are getting suspicious of me. Ha! If they only knew, they would throw Theodore into a padded room and lose the key! What he has planned for Tim is just ... unbelievable! I didn't think anything like that could happen outside of the movies! He has everything planned to the last detail. And the way he is going to pull this off ... I would warn the guards if I thought they would believe me. They won't, who would! I have to find Tim. It is actually very hard to track down Federal Agents, but I think I've gotten a lead. Hopefully, Tim won't shoot me on sight, lord knows he would be within his rights to, but I hope he will listen to me, for his sake.**

**Day 210**

**Found him! He is working in DC at NCIS. I wonder why he went into Navy? Maybe it was a way to get back at his old man. Having the Navy hold itself accountable, now that sounds like justice to me. Anyway, I am on my way to him. Please, please just listen to me ... just this once, I want to do what's right.**

**Day 225**

**I stood outside of the Navy Yard waiting to see if I could catch sight of Tim. He looks so different and yet the same, maybe its his eyes. It looks like he has finally found some friends, I watched as they all teased each other. I have never seen a smile like that before on Tim's face, I hate to be the one to take it away. Better me than Theodore. I will make contact tomorrow.**

"What else Abs?" Tony asked in a hushed tone.

"Nothing."

"What do you mean nothing?"

Abby sighed and turned to them. "I mean that's the last entry. I'm guessing he never got to make contact."

"He could have at least described Theodore's plans and methods." Ziva huffed.

"We will just have to ask him ourselves." Gibbs said in a steely voice. "You, with me." He pointed at Roger and they left the lab.

"Where are they going?" Ziva hissed.

"I'm going to guess to make arrangements for us to have a visitor." Tony paused. "Abs, do we know when these entries were made?"

"Not yet. As you can see, he stopped using dates, just day numbers, I'm guessing those are the number of days he has been back in the states. I'm matching that with the date that Timmy said he fell off the grid and cross checking with the date embedded on the flash drive."

"We did not find a computer at the scene. Will that make finding this information harder?'

"Not really, Ziva. It seems he used cyber-cafes and libraries to make his entries. That will actually make it easier."

"How so?" Tony asked.

Because there is no way to manipulate the date/time stamp when you are using someone else's system. Well, there is but you would have to be ... well, you'd have to be me or Timmy to do it. This guy was definitely no hacker."

Jimmy walked in carrying a hug Caf-Pow. "Here you go Abby, sorry it took so long, I dropped the first one." He blushed as he handed it over. "Did I miss anything?"

"Why don't you bring him up to speed, Ziva and I are getting back to the bull-pen."

"Sure Tony." Abby grabbed the Caf-Pow, took a long drag, and hooked her arm through Jimmy's. "Right this way."

Jimmy looked stunned, but allowed himself to be led by Abby. Tony and Ziva quietly left.

* * *

><p>Tomorrow's update is going to be later than usual, I have an all day meeting &amp; will not be able to get to my computer. But, don't worry - I will post as soon as I get home!<p> 


	28. Chapter 28

Okay, here is the next chapter. This day took waaaaaay longer than I expected (I haven't even watched NCIS yet. Thank goodness for DVR!). I hope it was worth the wait. Tomorrow's update will be around the regular time as always.

Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS or its characters.

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><p>Tim heard the elevator ding above him and turned to watch Gibbs and Roger stalking towards the Director's office.<p>

_Oh, that can't be good._

A few minutes latter, Tony and Ziva came back up. "So, what did you guys find? What was on the flash drive?"

"McGee ..."

"Tony, I'm not going to break."

Zia walked over to McGee and sat on the edge of his desk. "I think it is best if you wait for Gibbs to tell you."

"Ziva ..."

She reached out and placed a finger on his lips. "Wait. It is what Gibbs has asked of you, yes?"

McGee sighed but nodded.

"Good, have you found anything else?"

"Nothing useful."

"Hey, let us be the judge of that McPessimist." Tony also walked over to McGee's desk. "I'll even look at the women, if you want." He was trying to get a smile out of his friend. It only half worked.

"Sure Tony." McGee handed a stack of printouts to him and Ziva.

She nodded and gave a smile, hoping to relieve some of the distress she could see in Tim's eyes. "Do not worry McGee. We will have this figured out soon."

"I know you will." He took a moment to look at both of them. "Thanks guys." He gave a small smile and went back to his searches.

Tony and Ziva gave a worried look to each other but went back to their own desks and started going through the information Tim had found.

XXXX

Gibbs had stormed into Vance's office, per usual. "I guess you've found something Gibbs." Leon looked at the steely expression on the MCRT's Team Leader.

"That damn Theodore is controlling everything from his prison cell. Seible found out and left everything but the details on that damn flash drive. We need to bring that s.o.b here. I need to interrogate him."

"Do we know if the body belongs to Gunny Seible?"

"Not yet, but the flash drive was definitely his. He talks about McGee and Theodore and some sort of 'Final Reckoning and 'Ultimate Destiny'."

"That doesn't sound good. Staff Sergeant Ferris, what do you think?"

"I agree with Agent Gibbs. I think bringing him here is not part of his game plan. It might just throw him off enough that he will talk."

Vance took a moment to look between the two men, both looked angry and determined. "Alright, you two, MTAC, now." He stood and walked around them and out the door, knowing they would be following.

XXX

The meeting in MTAC took the rest of the day to get the coordination between NCIS, the Air Force and Central Prison in Raleigh, North Carolina. They had finally gotten everything settled and Theodore McGrory was scheduled to leave the prison in time to arrive at NCIS by 10:00 hours.

XXXX

Gibbs and Roger came down the stairs and noticed the evening protection detail was already waiting.

_Is it really that late already. Damn, McGee went all day without really eating anything._ Gibbs was kicking himself. "Alright everyone, time to call it a day."

Tony and Ziva popped up, Tim took a little longer but he was ready to leave with the rest of them.

The ride to the garage was quiet, each lost in their own thoughts.

It had been decided to not let Tim know that his childhood tormentor was on his way to NCIS. Gibbs knew he would have to tell Tony and Ziva so they could be prepared to conduct interrogations. Although, he would get the first crack at Theodore.

Once they were in the car, Gibbs looked at his team while keeping an eye on the road. Ziva was sitting in the front with him. DiNozzo and McGee were in the back. "Okay, just how hungry is everyone?"

"I'm starving Boss! Can we stop someplace on the way?"

"I am hungry as well, but I think it would be a better idea to wait until we get back to your place. Maybe we can order-in ... out." She titled her head sideways.

"It's actually right either way." Tony shoulder bumped Tim. "What's your opinion, McSilent?"

Tim shrugged. "I'm not really hungry guys, but I think Ziva's right, we shouldn't stop anywhere."

"Oh no, McWaif, you're eating something."

"Yes, McGee. I agree."

"Tim ..."

"Alright, alright." McGee actually smiled. "I know Tony will want pizza ..."

"Of course."

"Again? Do you not ever get tired of the same thing?"

"Of pizza? No way!"

"What do _**you **_want, Tim?" Gibbs pressed.

Tim shrugged again and took a moment to think. "Well, I haven't had Italian since ..." He shook his head. "No that's not a good idea."

Ziva turned around and looked over the back of her seat a soft expression on her face. "I think it is a very good idea. I have not had Italian in a long time either."

Tony looked between Tim and Ziva. "Since when?"

Tim looked down and murmured very quietly, "Amanda."

There was an awkward silence. Then Tony threw is arm around Tim's shoulder. "Well, then we need to remedy that! You cannot go through life without having Italian! I will be personally offended!"

Tim gave a small smile, "The closest you get being Italian is the pizza you eat."

"Hey! I have you know that we came directly from the old country. I think my dad might even have some mafia ties. Although, I think they may actually be after him ..."

McGee gave a quiet laugh.

It wasn't the full laugh as earlier, but they all were happy to take what they could get.

"Ziva, get in the glove compartment, I have a take-out menus for everything near by. I'm pretty sure there is an Italian restaurant or two that deliver."

"Really, Gibbs?"

"It's either that, or we could call Fornell and have him cook for us. He does Italian pretty well."

All three agents looked at their superior. Tony was the one brave enough to ask. "Um, how do you know ..."

"We share an ex-wife."

No one knew exactly what to say to that. Gibbs smiled to himself at the momentary silence. Tony was the one who broke it. "Okay then ... anyway, hand me that menu, like I said I'm starving!"

"I think McGee should choose first."

"Why ..."

That started the 'bickering' that lasted all the way to Gibbs'. During some point in the drive, he had called the order in and the delivery guy was waiting at the house by the time they pulled up. Gibbs had ordered enough for Abby, Jimmy and Ducky as well, plus a little extra for the Air Force detail.

Gibbs took care of the bill while the Airmen did a security check. Once the all clear was given, he roped Tony and Jimmy into helping him into the house with the food while Ziva and Abby watched after McGee.

This night was livelier than the one before. They got through two more of the saga before Gibbs forced them all to get to bed.

Tim insisted that he could sleep on his own and tried to give up the room he had been using.

Gibbs, placed a hand on his shoulder. "No, Tim. It's the safest bedroom in the house." Tim didn't look convinced. "It will make our job easier. Really."

Gibbs knew that plan of attack would work. Tim sighed and headed to bed, dog in tow.

"So, where you able to get him to talk about his nightmares?" Gibbs asked as he turned to look at Ziva, who had been standing behind him as he sent Tim to bed.

She shook her head. "There was not an opportunity."

Tony came from the kitchen. "Opportunity for what?"

Gibbs sighed and shook his head. "Nothing DiNozzo. Listen, we have arranged to have Theodore brought into NCIS tomorrow."

Tony grinned at looked at Ziva. "Told you so."

Gibbs shook his head at them. "I don't want Tim to know. At least for as long as possible. I want to keep him away from that monster for as long as I can. Be ready for anything, bring your best."

They both nodded at their Team Leader.

"Okay, DiNozzo, you take first shift." He walked past the two of them heading for Abby.

She was busy cleaning up. Even though they had ordered in, there were still some dishes to be done. "Hey Abs, you got a minute?"

"Sure thing Gibbs, just give me one sec." She finished drying some glasses and turned back to Gibbs. "Where to Bossman?"

He smiled, turned and started walking towards the back door, expecting Abby to follow, which she did.

They were sitting outside on the steps, much the same way Gibbs and Ducky the night before. "Tell me what happened today."

"What do you mean?"

Gibbs looked at her and became very serious. "I know that you were not in the bull-pen just to keep Tim company. So, what happened?"

She looked away. "Well, I just wanted to watch him at his desk." She looked back at Gibbs, pleading her case. "You know he looks really good at that desk ... and not just because I'm used to him there. Timmy's turned into such a good agent. Too good. Too many others want to take him away and I just needed to watch him be Special Agent Timothy McGee."

He could see the desperation in her, the way she talked, moved her hands, and the look in her eyes. But, he was still no closer to understanding what had taken place. He moved over to Abby and put a gentle arm around her. "What's got you so freaked out Abs?"

She chewed on her bottom lip, both not wanting to get Tim in trouble and not wanting to voice her own fears.

Gibbs felt her reluctance and gave a quick shoulder squeeze. "It's okay, whatever it is. I won't punish him for it."

It was the right thing to say, as her shoulders slumped and she finally voiced what had bothered her all day long. "He, Timmy, is just so good at so many things ... and they love him down in Cyber-crimes ... do you know they still call him Boss, even though he hasn't been down there in years ... They treat him so great down there ... and we don't always ... I mean most of the time, but not always ... they keep wanting him to come back ... and what if he goes? ... I couldn't blame him ... but I don't want him to go ... I ... I ..."

It came out rushed and run together, pauses only long enough for her to take a breath. When she was done, she leaned into Gibb's shoulder and cried.

Gibbs held her and let her work it out of her system. He knew these kind of tears, had seen them from Kelly on occasion. These were tears of frustration and pent-up emotion. Once she had calmed down, he knew he could start asking questions. "What brought this all up?"

Abby wiped her eyes and her nose with her sleeve. "Tim came and checked on my progress, when we were done, he went to see Ducky. Guess he didn't know there was a call out. He wandered into Cyber-crimes. He does that sometimes when you guys have nothing going on. Did you know that?"

Gibbs nodded, oh yeah, he knew, he didn't like it very much, but he knew. Gibbs thought about putting a stop to it, but couldn't think of a valid reason. He had reasons, he didn't want to share and he didn't want Cyber-crimes thinking they could get Tim back, but even he had to admit, they were not valid work related reasons. However, he couldn't deny Tim when he had seen him come back from Cyber-crimes all smiles and use something he just figured out from there to help on one of their cases.

"He lost track of time down there. When we, Shane, one of the Air Force guys, and me went to get him, everyone down there was just loving the fact he was down there and Joan tried to talk him into going back. He said no, that he was happy where he was, but ..."

He gave another squeeze. "But what?"

Abby started working herself up again. "I know he gets really frustrated with us at times, all of us, and what if ... what if we push to hard and he decides we're not worth it ... what if ..." She was almost crying again.

Gibbs pulled her into a full hug. "Then we are going to have to be careful and make sure he knows that we really do want him with us."

She nodded against him and fought to gain control without more tears. Gibbs wanted to leave it there, but knew he couldn't. "Does this have anything to do with Mexico?"


	29. Chapter 29

Now, we're back on track. I really liked the episode last night. Glad to see Tony was feeling bad about his bullying of Tim in the past (hm, sounds familiar ... lol), although sad to find out it was Tony who was bullied. Although, it does explain much about his character, having to always prove himself as the savvy, cool, tough guy. Any way I'm starting to ramble.  
>I've watched the preview for the next show about ten times! I can't wait until next week!<br>Until then, ... on with the story ...

Disclaimer: I do not own or make any money from NCIS.

* * *

><p>Abby's head shot up. "What do you mean? What did Tim tell you?"<p>

"He hasn't told me anything, but I understand that something down there has him feeling really guilty. I've read over the reports and there is nothing on there that he would have to feel bad about, so, did something happen between the two of you?"

She took a deep breath and then exhaled slowly. She knew she had acted badly in Mexico, she even apologized to McGee about it, in her own special way. But telling Gibbs that she disregarded the safety of both of them, this was not going to be pleasant.

"You know, Alejandro ... Rivera invited me down to conduct a class in forensic science."

"Yeah."

"Well, knowing what I know now, I realize it was just a way to get me down there to ..." She paused to look around to make sure no one was listening. She dropped her voice to a whisper. "... to give me that bullet."

"Okay. I know all this Abs. What does any of it have to do with McGee?"

"Alejandro had told us to stay within the University because he couldn't guarantee our safety outside of it. And ..." She paused, nervous.

"And ..." Gibbs was starting to lose his patience.

"And I didn't listen. I insisted that I had to take my class to the actual crime scene. I barreled over all of their objections. I told Tim I would just leave him behind if he didn't do what I wanted."

Gibbs was stunned. He never would have thought Abby would act so carelessly about her own safety, but then he remembered Mikel Mawher. He had been angry at Tim, not only because he let Mikel have an opening, but because he didn't stand up for himself against Abby. "Abby ..."

"That's not the worst part."

"There's more?"

Abby nodded. "Paloma Reynosa came up to us. Had her goons with guns on all of us, being very threatening, and Tim ..." She really hated to think about the position she had put him in. "Tim offered himself as a hostage if she would let everyone else go. Said that, as a Federal Agent, he would be worth more than a forensic scientist and her class."

Gibbs was so angry he couldn't speak. He just stared at Abby.

Abby, was fidgeting, uncomfortable about the way Gibbs was looking at her, so she decided to fill the silence. "Paloma called him very brave, said that she would spare us as long as we looked into something for her and that's when she tossed me the bullet casing."

She could see that Gibbs was still very angry. "I'm sure she never intended to hurt any of us ... she just wanted leverage on you ..."

"You didn't know that then!" His voice quiet so as not to wake the rest of the house, but it was still full of anger. "What would you have done if she took McGee up on his offer? Why isn't that in any of the reports."

"I asked him not to say anything. Afterwards I knew how dumb I had been. I felt really bad about not only putting myself at risk, but Tim and my class. I told him I was sorry and asked him not to mention anything because ..."

"Because you knew I'd never let you go anywhere again."

Abby winced. "Yeah." She said sheepishly.

He thought about a couple of weeks ago, when Abby had been asked to give a presentation in South Africa. She would have needed an escort and they had asked Tim to do it. He had come to Gibbs practically begging for someone else to be sent. Quoting all the reasons that Abby would be safer with Tony or Ziva. He thought it odd that Tim was trying so hard to get out of an assignment. Now it made sense. He really did feel that he wouldn't be able to keep Abby safe. The whole thing was called off and Abby gave her presentation via MTAC, but it had left Gibbs seriously questioning Tim's abilities, until now. "Abby, I ..."

"It won't ever happen again Gibbs! I promise!"

He looked at her hard and saw the sincerity and the fear. His anger lessened a little. "You're damn right it won't! He is an agent, Abby, just like me or Tony or Ziva. If you can't separate the agent from the friend, then I think it is best that someone else acts as your escort from now on."

"But ..."

"No, no buts. Until I see that you treat him just seriously and with the same respect as the rest of us, I won't risk either of you by putting you in those kind of situations."

"Either of us?"

Gibbs nodded. "That's right. By his lack of back bone, he put both of you at risk. What if Paloma would have opened fire and I would have lost you both. He's in charge and he needs to make sure you understand that, even if you don't like it."

"Gibbs, I ..."

"Jethro, really, aren't you forgetting something very important here?" Ducky came out to join them. He had been listening, just to see if he would be needed.

"And what's that?"

"Abigail is your favorite. Everyone knows they would face your wrath if anything was done to upset or hurt her." He sat down and put a hand on Abby's shoulder. "No offense my dear girl."

"No, you're right. I know how hard Timmy tries to please Gibbs. That he is worried about everything he does and what the bossman will think of him."

"You use that against him?" Gibbs was getting angry again, now realizing why Tim had a lot of the issues he did.

"Not really ... I just ... well, I just like getting my way. You know that I don't stop to think about the consequences until after. Haven't learned yet, some scientist I am."

Ducky patted Abby's shoulder. "Now, now my dear. Do not take all the blame, as Jethro said, Timothy does bare some responsibility here. He should have put his foot down regardless of how mad you would get at him or how mad ..."

"Or how mad I would." Gibbs completed for him.

Ducky gave a small smile. "Which is a feat in and of itself."

"But I wouldn't have been mad at him for that, no matter how much Abby would have complained."

"I'm sure everyone knows that except Timothy, because he always finds fault with what he does. If he does something good, it could have been better, if he does something wrong, it is a personal blow against him. He felt the best solution to keep two people happy, two people who mean the world to him, was to do something against what his training dictated. We know what he is willing to sacrifice for someone he cares for."

They were all quiet as they remembered him quitting, without a second thought, when it came to defending his sister.

Gibbs sighed, pulled Abby into a hug, and kissed her on the top of her head.

"You're not mad at me anymore?"

"Yes and no, Ducky's right, there was a lot more to that situation. Plus, it is in the past, to punish either of you now is too far after the fact. But, I meant what I said, it won't put either of you in that kind of situation again, until I see changes. Understand?"

Abby kiss his cheek. "I understand, but I meant it too, when I promised that I would never let it happen again."

Gibbs studied her for a moment and then nodded. "Alright, bed time for you."

She smiled, stood and stretched. "Okay, night Gibbs." She planted a kiss on top of the ME's head. "Night, Ducky."

"Good night, my dear."

Both men waited until she was inside before speaking again. Gibbs let out a long sigh. "That must be killing him."

"It has been hard for him yes. When I got him talking about it, it nearly sent him into a panic attack. The danger he allowed Abby to be in, her class, what would you think of him, how he didn't measure up to Tony or Ziva, so on and so on."

"What about the danger he put himself in?"

"Oh, he had no worries about that. Said it would have ...um, 'served him right' if Reynosa would have taken him. His punishment for being so stupid and weak."

The two men fell silent as the night stretch on.

"How does he do it Duck? How does he take all of that baggage and turn it around to be such a good agent and not come apart at the seams?"

"How do any of us do it?"

Gibbs fell silent again, trying to make sense of it all.

Ducky stood and place a hand on Gibbs' shoulder. "Don't think so much about it. He trusts you, and the team, but you more than any other person in his entire life."

"There's Sarah."

"Yes, and he does trust her, but he is her protector, the big brother who needs to be infallible. It is you that he trusts with his own safety, that is something he has never had before."

Gibbs looked up at his old friend.

Ducky gave a squeeze, "I shall see you tomorrow Jethro, do try to get some sleep."

"Night, Duck."

Gibbs stayed on the back porch, thinking, until DiNozzo came to get him for his rotation.

XXXX

It was a relatively quiet night. Tim's nightmares were not as intense as they had been. Although, each of the team had a turn at calming him during at least one point during their rotation.

Tim awoke alone in the bed, for the first time in two days. Well, alone except for his dog. He sat up and gained the attention of said dog. "Good Morning Jethro, did you have a good night."

"As well as yours McGee."

Tim stopped for a moment wondering if his dog really just spoke to him, then he realized the voice was coming from behind him. He smiled and turned around. "Morning, Boss."

Gibbs leaned against the door frame, glad to see McGee actually looking rested. "You have thirty minutes before breakfast is ready."

Tim nodded and swung his legs out of bed.

Since he was wearing a t-shirt and boxers, it was the first time Gibbs had seen the scar on his leg from the car accident.

McGee noticed where he was looking and followed Gibbs' eyes down to his own leg. "Yeah, I won't be winning any contests for nice looking legs, but at least its still there."

Gibbs' eyes went from the scar to his agent's eyes. "Was there a worry it wouldn't be?"

Tim met Gibbs' eyes and shrugged. "I'm not sure. I was pretty out of it for a while. From what I know, I was unconscious for three days and semi-conscious for another two. So by the time I was ready to understand what had happened to me, all the important stuff was out of the way. I just needed to recover."

"From what you know? Wouldn't your parents have told you everything that had happened? I know they weren't the best parents in the world, but with something this severe, I would think paternal instinct would finally kick in."

Tim looked away from his boss and studied his scar. "Nope."

Gibbs came into the room and sat down on the bed next to McGee. "Tell me what happened."

Tim shrugged. "The car was junk, it was barley running. The fact that I crashed it on first day I had it out just proved I didn't deserve it. Being in the hospital was my punishment for thinking too much of my self." He shrugged again. "Only Sarah came to see me, and the doctors weren't to inclined to tell a seven-year-old much detail."

So much more made sense from his conversation with Ducky last night. Gibbs took a moment to calm himself before he spoke, knowing it would come out wrong if he didn't. "I've heard of neglect before, but ..."

Again, Tim just shrugged. "What are you supposed to do if the kid you got isn't the one you wanted?"

Gibbs' response was automatic. "You love them anyway."

That brought a small smile to McGee. "I figured you'd say something like that." The smile fell and he looked up at his boss. "But, it's easier said than done. What if I was your kid. I know I'm nothing like what you would have wanted. Could you have really looked past all the 'should have beens' and 'what ifs'? To see past all the hopes and dreams that would never come true? To know that your own flesh and blood would not be anything like you or follow in your footsteps?"

Gibbs was taken back by the sincerity of McGee's questions. _How could he even try to understand their point of view?_ He opened his mouth to respond, but Tim cut him off.

"Take a moment to really think about it." Tim fidgeted uncomfortably as he knew the statement he was about to make was treading on sacred ground.. "Think about your daughter, what you wanted for her, where you thought she'd end up in life and now think about her being the complete opposite of that."

Gibbs did take a moment to think, really think about it. He and Shannon had so many dreams for Kelly, that even by the time of their deaths, he and Shannon had not stopped debating her potential. He never wanted his daughter in the military, thinking more that she would take after her mother instead of her father. But what if she didn't? What if she felt the same pull to go into the military he did? What if she felt the pull to go into something else entirely, like the clergy or politics?

Then he thought about Tim. Would he really be proud to have a son like Tim? They were so different as boss and subordinate, what if it was as father and son?

He shook his head and looked at Tim. "I may not have agreed with every decision my daughter might have made, if she had lived. I may not have even agreed with what profession she would have ended up in, but she would always be my daughter and the only way I would _**ever**_ think about turning my back on her is if she would have become a criminal like the ones we deal with everyday ... and that is only _**think **_about."

McGee went to say something, but a soft head-slap stopped him. "I'm not done. Would you and I have had a smooth relationship as father and son, no. I won't kid myself or you about that, but I would have been able to see all of that potential just dying to be tapped. I would have guided that potential and watch you grow into someone amazing." He paused and put his hand, that had just slapped his agent, on the back of Tim's neck and gave a firm, but gentle squeeze. "In fact, that is exactly what I did."

Tim searched Gibbs eyes for any sign of doubt or platitude. He found only sincerity. It made his heart ache for all the things that might have been and he felt tears start to well up. _No! I will not cry again!_

Gibbs saw the struggle. "It is okay to be who you are, Tim. In fact, you are one of the best people I know. I am proud to have you on my team. I am proud to have been part of your growth and development as an agent. I am proud of **you**."

Tim lost the battle as tears slowly came down his face. He turned away from Gibbs.

"Hey, don't be ashamed. Tears are not a sign of weakness."

Tim shook his head, afraid to speak.

"Just because the three of us are not brave enough to be honest with ourselves and let tears show once in a while, does _**not**_ mean you are any less of a person because you can."

Tim shook his head again, but the tears kept coming. Gibbs moved his hand from the back of Tim's neck to now rest on his far shoulder. He pulled Tim towards him. "If you parents couldn't see past themselves, then that is their failing, not yours. I know it will take time, but you need to erase everything they ever taught you about yourself."

Tim stayed silent. He didn't even move except for the small movements of his shoulders while he cried.

Gibbs rode it out with him.

When McGee had settled, Gibbs tried to look him in the eyes, but Tim wouldn't lift his head. He sighed, patted Tim's leg then left him to get ready for his day.

Ziva was waiting outside the bedroom door.

"How much did you hear David?"

She did not try to lie. "All of it. I came up right after you. I cannot believe his parents would treat him like that! Even my father pretended to care, even if it was just to get us to do what he wanted."

"Ziva ..."

"It is not right Gibbs! How is it that someone like McGee did not have the childhood we all thought he had ... loving and caring and supportive!"

"Ziva ..."

"He deserves so much better! He ..."

Gibbs reached out and pulled his second surrogate daughter into an embrace. "It will be alright Ziva. For him and for us."

Ziva did not cry, but she did allow herself to draw strength from Gibbs. They stood there for a few moments until she felt more composed. "Thank you, Gibbs."

He smiled at her, let go of the embrace and pulled her along with him. "Come on, let's get some food."

She hesitated as her gaze never left the bedroom door.

"He'll be alright. Come on, business as usual."

She paused a moment more, but when Gibbs gave another tug, she went with him.


	30. Chapter 30

Breakfast was quiet. Everyone could tell something was on McGee's mind, but a sharp look from Gibbs and everyone let it drop.

Gibbs thought Tim was rethinking what was said earlier and trying to get his parents out of his head. He couldn't have been more wrong.

_I'm ready. My program is running, I have my exit plan, now all I need ... all I need is another victim._ Tim pushed his food around his plate. _That's really great Tim, your whole plan hinges on someone else getting hurt, some investigator you are. You're suppose to stop people from getting hurt!_

Everyone piled into the car, it was a little cramped because Abby insisted on riding in with them. They were going to let Tim ride shot gun again, until Abby gave a look that clearly said 'let me sit by him, or else'. So, Tony took the front, while Tim was sandwiched in between Ziva and Abby.

Tony tried to joke with him about it, but gave up after a few death glares from the ladies and a few head-slaps from Gibbs. Tim was still deep in thought as the trek to work began.

_Come on Tim, where did this all happen. Where were you ... what kind of locker? A gym locker ... no. Bus station ... no. Work ... yeah maybe a work locker ... but to where?_

Tim mulled it over the whole way to work. His team was giving him worried glances, which he missed.

XXXX

Gibbs had been watching McGee all morning. He was worried that Tim hadn't eaten anything, so he grabbed a couple of the nutritional shakes that Palmer had stocked up on. He didn't like Tim using them so much. His agent had really slimmed down over the years and didn't have much leeway with weight. If he lost even a couple of pounds, it could become dangerous. Gibbs would never admit to hovering, but he kept a very close eye on his agent.

They all went to their respective desks, getting their systems ready for the day.

As McGee was getting ready to start another search, his cell phone rang. He froze for a moment and then tried to quickly answer it before the caller hung up. "Hello." He asked warily.

~"So, the hero finally answers."~

He knew that voice immediately, but he also knew he needed to buy time for the tracing program. "Who is this?" He put _**his **_tracing program up on the plasma, the real one was going in a small window at the corner of his screen.

~"Oh, come now Timothy, could you ever really forget me?"~

The rest of the team and Roger and walked over to Tim's desk the moment he answered the phone. They were now intently watching the tracking program ... Tim's tracking program.

"Where are you?"

~"Don't tell me you that you don't already know. I know you better than that Timothy. Much better."~

Tim sighed, in actuality he still hadn't remembered. "What do you want?" He watched his tracking program bounce in the opposite direction from where the real tracking program was following the signal.

~"Come now hero, you know exactly what I want."~

"I-I'm not a h-hero." Tim stumbled on his words as the cruel voice, full of longing, from the phone threw him back to all those years ago.

~"Yes you are. You will come here to try to save my latest substitute."~

Tim desperately tried to remember his training. "I n-need proof of l-life before I w-will go a-anywhere."

~"No you don't. You will come, either to save him or to return his body to his loved ones. But, no matter what, you will come to me Timothy."~

Tim swallowed hard. "Y-you don't k-know that." His eyes looked over the tracking program, it was almost finished.

~ "Oh, yes I do. I will be waiting, Timothy." ~ The caller hung up.

Tim sunk down into his chair and shaky hands tried to finalize the trace. "G-got it."

Gibbs was worried about Tim, in a matter of seconds he went from confident agent to a scared little boy. Not that he could blame him. "Where is he Tim?"

"An a-abandoned r-river front w-warehouse. I-it's about an hour away. W-we'll never get to him b-before ... before ..."

Gibbs came around the desk and put a comforting hand on Tim's shoulder. "You don't know that Tim, you know how I drive." He could feel Tim shaking.

"L-let me come, B-boss. It's m-me he's after."

"That's exactly why you need to stay here."

"B-but ..."

"No!" It came out harsher than Gibbs had intended, but it made his point. McGee hung his head and Gibbs bent down to whisper directly into his ear. "I will protect you son, no matter what. Let me take care of this. I will not see you hurt any more. Understand?"

Tim lifted his head and green eyes searched blue. He wanted Gibbs to understand that he had to confront his past tormentor to stop all of this, it was the only way. If Gibbs would let him go, he would admit his deception and take them to the proper location. However, he could see by the set of his mentor's face that was not happening. He lowered his eyes. "Y-yes Boss."

He wanted to say more, but time was wasting. "DiNozzo, David, Sergeant Ferris, let's move out."

They all nodded. As they headed towards the elevator, Roger pulled Williams with him, leaving only Masterson behind.

McGee breathed out. He hated being in this position. He knew Gibbs was just trying to protect him, like he said he would. It was nice to finally have, but he wasn't a kid anymore ... even if he felt like one right now. He knew this guy wouldn't stop until he got a hold of him.

He took a quick look at Masterson. _It's defiantly better there's only one of them._ He looked at his computer and enlarged the window with the real phone trace. It was to a warehouse, only about thirty minutes away. _IPSCO ... damn! How did I not remember? Because I didn't want too, I guess I really am a coward._ Tim sighed at himself in disgust.

He started to get everything ready for his departure. He would leave a trail so that his team would know and hopefully understand what he had done. He had put his regular wallet in his desk drawer instead of his NCIS ID since he would need that to get out of the building. Luckily, he had done it so smoothly that no one had noticed the difference.

The biggest problem was his service weapon. He would love to take his Sig with him, but that would defiantly attract the Airman's attention. No, he would have to hope that his back up gun and knife would be enough.

Ten minutes later, he was completely ready. Now he just needed to wait for the right time. If his team was still too close, they might make it back before he was able to get too far. He figured the perfect time to leave would be when they checked in once they got to the warehouse. McGee hated to wait one more minute, let alone fifty, but if he acted hastily now, his whole plan would fall apart.

His biggest concern was what would happen when he got the IPSCO warehouse. Could he take on his tormentor on his own? He would figure it out as he went. Tim sighed one last time and settled in to wait.

XXXX

Tim jumped as his work phone rang forty minutes later. "McGee."

~ "Hey, Probie. Any change on his location?" ~

"No, but he probably threw the phone away and left."

~ "Hey now, what did I say about being a pessimist?" ~

"I know, just ... be careful, okay?"

~ "Aren't I always?" ~

"That's what I'm afraid of."

~ "Ha ha ... Hey Tim?" ~

"Yeah, Tony?"

~ "Don't worry, this will all be over soon, promise." ~

"I know." _Boy, do I know!_

Tim could hear Gibbs in the background. "Off the phone, DiNozzo, we're here."

~ "Okay, Boss. Gotta go Tim." ~

"Yeah ..."

Tony hung up, but Tim didn't. "Okay, I'll ask Abby." He paused again. "Yeah, yeah I'm on my way. Bye."

McGee stood and looked at the remaining Airman. "I need to run a check of the trace. I have to do that in Abby's lab. It should only take about fifteen to twenty minutes." He hoped that since Masterson didn't really know him, he couldn't tell the lie written all over his face.

Masterson gave him a hard look.

"I won't go anywhere else. I promise."

The Airman took another moment before giving a curt nod. "Twenty, tops."

"Yes, sir." He walked to the inner elevators. As he waited, he wondered if this would be the last time he would see NCIS. Even if he lived through this, Gibbs was going to kill him. Tim got in the elevator and started his timer as soon as doors closed. _I should be there by the time they realize I'm gone._

He went all the way down to the evidence garage. He was about to use his escape route when a golden opportunity presented itself.

Two of the night shift agents were coming back from a long stake out. "Man, I'm tired. I wish we could just leave the car here." John Jamison, the senior agent was complaining.

"JJ, you know we can't leave an agency car here as evidence, if it's not." Steven Whitten, his partner of seven years, whined back.

Tim bit back a smile. Never look a gift horse in the mouth. "Hey, guys, let me help."

The two agents turned towards McGee, Steven responded. "Oh, hey Tim. What's up?"

"Not much. Trying to stay out of Gibbs way. I messed up a trace, sent them in the completely wrong direction." _Rule seven: Always be specific when you lie_.

"Ouch. He must be fuming." JJ replied.

"Yeah." _He's going to be._ "I'm trying to stay off his radar. I'll take the car back for you. That way you guys can get done quicker and I can kill some time before ... before getting killed." Tim smiled shakily.

JJ and Steven looked at each other and then at Tim with a sympathetic smile. The entire NCIS building knew Gibbs and his reputation. He didn't get to be lead field agent of NCIS' top team by accident. JJ gave him the keys. "Sure Tim. Just don't stay away too long, that will get him in even more of an uproar."

"Don't I know it." He took the keys and nodded. "Thanks, I owe you one." He got in the car and drove off, he shook his head in the review mirror. "Sorry to do that to you guys. Gibbs is going to go ballistic and you guys are going to catch the brunt of it." He hoped they would all forgive him ... someday.

Instead of going to the parking lot, he went out the front gate. Giving his ID to the security guard. Everyone knew how reliable Tim was, so the guard barley paid any attention and never realized the car was still signed out to Agents Jamison and Whitten.

Tim was out in record time and on his way to met his fate.

XXXX

The fifteen minute mark had come and gone. Airman Masterson was getting worried, but stayed put. It wasn't past the twenty minute deadline yet. After what had happened the other day, it was decided to not give Tim too much leeway with time. At exactly twenty-five minutes the Airman was going to sound the alarm.

Abby coming up to the bullpen put an end to the Airman's debate.

Abby took a moment to look at each desk in a spinning motion and stopped at the Airman. "Where's Timmy?"

Masterson furrowed his eyebrows. "Isn't he with you?"

"No. I haven't seen him since we got to work."

"Damn it!" Masterson walked over to Abby. "He said that we was going down to your lab to double check his trace, almost twenty minutes ago."

"He can do that from here, or maybe he ended up in Cyber-crimes again."

"He promised he wouldn't stop anywhere else."

Abby wrung her hands. _Not again._ "Let me check with them, okay?"

"Quickly."

Abby practically ran behind Tim's desk and started making calls. "Hey Joan, have you seen Timmy? ... No? ... Okay, well let him know I'm looking for him, okay? ... Thanks." She hung up and held her hand up to Masterson to wait while she made another call. "Ducky, is Tim with you? ... Have you seen him? ... No, he's not. ... Okay."

She made one last call, to Tim's cell phone. When she heard it ringing from inside his desk drawer, she felt cold all over. While listening to her call go to voicemail, she opened the drawer and saw Tim's cell phone, Sig Sauer, and wallet, but no NCIS ID. She dropped down into his chair and looked at Masterson with increasing fear.

He nodded and started making calls of his own.

XXXX

The warehouse was huge, but practically empty. It didn't take the team long to search the building, but they did a double check, making sure not to miss any hidden trap doors or break away ceilings.

After half an hour, they were sure nothing was there, not even the cell phone.

"Is McGeek sure he got the right place?"

Gibbs grabbed his phone and started to open it to call their computer expert when Roger's phone rang instead.

"Ferris. ... What? ... For how long? ... Did you double check ... ... Alright, lock it down and pull all security footage. Also ..." Roger walked off still giving orders with Williams following.

"That does not sound good." Ziva looked at her teammates.

Before Gibbs could respond, his own cell phone went off. "Gibbs! … Leon, what's going on? ... WHAT? ... How could that have happened? ... We're on our way."

"Boss?"

Gibbs looked at each of his agent's worried faces before continuing. "Tim's missing."

"What?"

"How?"

Roger walked back over. "That's what we're going to find out. Masterson has locked down the building and is getting NCIS agents to conduct a room by room search. Your Ms. Sciuto is pulling all security footage. Let's get back there." He didn't wait for an answer as he strode back to the agency car with Williams at his side.

The three agents were stunned a moment by Roger taking charge. Gibbs shook his head, this was not the time to worry about it. He took off after the Airmen, followed by Tony and Ziva.

Gibbs handed the keys to Ziva, the meaning understood. The ride back was anything but quiet as both Gibbs and Roger got continued updates and gave more orders. It took less time to get back than it had going out.


	31. Chapter 31

Wow - you guys are amazing. I am so honored and humbled by your reviews. I appreciate them more than I can ever express.

This is going to be a doozie of a chapter, be ready & hang on!

Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS or it characters.

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><p>Gibbs stalked into the bull-pen, "Somebody tell me something." He pushed through Ducky, Jimmy, Vance and Masterson, who were all standing around McGee's desk.<p>

"I'm going to kill him!" Abby said as mean as she could, through her tears.

"Abs?"

She looked up to him. "He did this ... Timmy did."

"Explain."

"I was going to use his computer to start going through the security records, you know, so I could kinda be close to him and ..."

"Abby, stay on track."

"Right." As she took a calming breath or two she noticed everyone had crowed around her to find out what she had. She looked at all the worried faces and wondered if McGee knew how many people he was affecting.

"I couldn't get into his computer, he password protected it."

"Why would he do that?" Tony asked.

Joan, who had come up after Abby's call, answered. "To slow us down." She reached over the Goth and brought the screen up on the plasma. "He made the first level pretty easy."

"First level?" Ziva chimed in.

Joan and Abby nodded and then looked at the plasma, everyone followed. It was Gibbs who read the message out loud. 'Hey Abby, if you're reading this, then you have realized I left NCIS. Try not to be too mad. I can't let anyone else get hurt because of me. Not anyone from the team and no more substitutes. This is between me and Theodore and that's where it needs to stay. Rule 45. Take care of everyone for me. Thanks and Sorry.'

Everyone stood in silence. Roger sat down on the edge of a desk, a distant memory was trying to make its way to the forefront, but it wasn't quite making it.

Tony broke the silence. "Does that mean he's on his way to see Theodore? Well, he's in for a surprise."

Abby looked at him. "What do you mean?"

Gibbs looked at Vance. "Is everything alright with the transport?"

Vance nodded. "In fact, your guest is sitting in our interrogation room."

Gibbs stormed over to his desk and found the number he wanted to call. "Warden Bouchard, this is Agent Gibbs. ... One of my agents is on his way to your prison. Make sure he that he stays there, even if you have to handcuff him to something. ... Trouble, oh, yeah, he's in a world of trouble. Just make sure he's there when I get there. ... Thanks." Gibbs hung up and turned to the crowd. "Time to met our guest."

"Gibbs, wait!"

He paused and half turned, he only raised an eyebrow at Abby.

"Do you want me to keep working on decrypting Timmy's computer?"

"Yes, I want to know everything that he does."

Her worried eyes search his angry ones. She eventually nodded and got back to work. Joan and Jimmy staying with her. Ducky, Vance, Tony, Ziva and the three Airmen went with Gibbs.

XXXX

The NCIS personnel were in the observation room. Williams and Masterson stood guard in the hallway. Ferris and Gibbs were the two who entered the interrogation room.

Gibbs nodded to the two agents who were guarding the prisoner and they left without a word.

Gibbs stalked around the man before sitting down and Roger locked eyes with the man across from Gibbs.

The man smiled. "Roger, long time no see. You haven't come and visited, that make me very sad." He gave a wolfish grin that made Roger's skin crawl. A vague sense of foreboding hit him. There was something not right, but he couldn't put his finger on it.

The prisoner made a show of looking around the room. "Where's Timothy?"

"What do you want with my agent?"

"I'll only tell him that."

"Sorry, he's busy. You'll have to settle for me."

"No doing. It's Timothy or nothing. The time for substitutes is over." He looked intently from Gibbs to Roger. He gave that terrible grin again. "He's not here is he?"

Neither man said anything.

A horrible sound came out of the prisoner in front of them, laughing. "He's already figured it out. Knew he would. Lil' Timmy's always been smarter than the rest of us ... combined."

That set alarm bells off for Roger. _Theodore would never use a nickname and he always thought he and Tim were on the same level. Why would ..._ The horrible truth hit Roger right between the eyes and he gasped.

Gibbs fought hard not to react to either man. _What the hell is going on?_

Roger walked over to the man in orange, grabbed him by the arms and lifted him from the chair. He studied him for a minute, saw the circle around the irises from contacts and the red roots growing in from died hair, and knew without a shadow of a doubt who he was speaking to. "How?"

"Ah, finally catching on, hun, Roger-boy."

"You son-of-a-bitch, I asked you how."

The man would only smile. Roger slammed him against the wall. "HOW?"

Gibbs jumped up and grabbed Roger by the shoulder. As much as he wanted to do the same thing, there were standards that had to be followed. "Stand down Staff Sergeant."

"You don't understand!"

"What I understand is that if we rough him up, we won't get anything."

"We won't get anything any way."

"I think you are underestimating us."

"No, we underestimated Theodore." Roger said with disgust as he let the prisoner go.

Gibbs gestured at the man leaning against the wall. "Don't give him that much credit."

"Him, he's nothing. It's Theodore we have to worry about." Roger walked towards the door but Gibbs grabbed his arm and stopped him.

"What are you talking about?"

Roger turned and glared at the figure behind Gibbs. "That's not Theodore."

"What?" Gibbs increased the pressure on Roger's arm.

"That. Is. Not. Theodore."

Gibbs let go of Roger's arm and turned around to the imposter, who was smiling and laughing at them.

"Sure took you long enough. I bet Lil' Timmy and Theodore are enjoying getting, um, 'reacquainted'."

Gibbs knew exactly what he was referring to and it made his blood run cold, and then hot. He stormed over to the man and got right in his face. "Who are you?"

"Tell him Roger-boy." The grin didn't leave his face.

Gibbs never took his focus off the man in front of him. "Well, Staff Sergeant?"

"It's Nate Enedy."

"Hello Agent Gibbs. Nice to met you in person. You have been a quite a big influence on Lil' Timmy. Theodore has been quite please that you guided his other-half so well."

"He does not belong to that monster." Gibbs replied, still nose to nose with Nate.

"Of course he does. Just like your fingers belong to your hand; and your hand belongs to your arm; and your arm belongs to you. They are two parts of a whole. They belong to each other."

"You can't tell me you actually believe that crap." Roger hissed.

Nate broke eye contact with Gibbs and looked past him to Roger. "Of course I do. Do you remember how well Theodore was doing when Lil' Timmy was around?"

"Well? He, we, made Tim's life a living hell! I wouldn't call that doing well."

"His grades went up, things got better with his Dad, he even started seeing a girl or two. Thing had never been so good for Theodore before."

"Tim's life had to be miserable so that his could be good?" Roger asked incredulously.

"It's all about balance."

"Balance my ass. You, he, we all knew that Tim's Dad didn't treat him good at all. So Tim wasn't allowed to have any happiness so that Theodore could have some, that doesn't seem very balanced to me."

The smile dropped from Nate's face. "He was happy. Good grades, teacher's pet ..."

"And that was it! No friends, no family to be there for him. It was just him against the world!" Roger was yelling.

"It was a balance."

Gibbs had had enough. "You keep telling yourself that. Now, all I want to know is where."

Nate's eyes focused back on him. "Where?"

"Yes, where did that ... monster lure my agent?"

"I don't know."

"Don't play games with me."

The smile returned. "As fun as that would be, I really don't know. It is a place special to Lil' Timmy and Theodore."

"The only places they've ever been together are out in California. You can't tell me Tim is driving all the way across the country." Roger said coldly.

Once again, Nate's eyes left Gibbs to look at Roger, but then came back. He shrugged. "Think what you want. I'm sure it is over by now. I can't wait for them to come and get me."

"Them? Come and get you?"

Nate sat down and nodded. "Yup, Once they are whole, Theodore promised he would come and get me when it was done."

"Do you really think he'll keep that promise?" Gibbs asked.

"Nope, but Lil' Timmy would. Like I said, its all about balance."

Gibbs just stared that the person in front of him for a moment and then shook his head. He got up and headed for the door. "Come on Staff Sergeant. You were right, we won't get anything more out of him."

Roger nodded and left, they went into the observation room and were met with silence.

"What do you think?" Vance asked.

"I think they're both a couple of loons." Gibbs said with anger. "And, I need to find Tim, now." He turned and headed out of the room, with the troop following.

XXXX

"Abs, whac'ya find?" Gibbs asked before he was even off the elevator.

She was concentrating so much on what she was doing that she jumped at Gibbs voice. "Gibbs! Don't do that!" She took a moment to calm herself. She shook her head. "Joan and I are still trying to get in. He protected this part very well."

"Because that's the part we need in order to find him! Damn it McGee!" Gibbs hit his desk in frustration.

Abby looked at him and then the rest of the group. "What happened?"

Tony looked at Gibbs, he was too mad to think straight right now, so it was up to the senior field agent to take the lead. "The short version. The guy in interrogation is Nate Edney, who switched places with Theodore. Probie figured it out. Decided to go face his demons on his own."

"No way."

"That is the sum of it Abby." Ziva confirmed. "That is how McGee was able to plan this so well, he knew what we were missing."

"But why didn't he tell us? Why did he fell like he had to go it alone?"

"Because of his father, because of us, because of him! Who cares at this point, just find him!" Gibbs growled in frustration.

Everyone knew that Gibbs didn't take losing one of his people very well, none of them did. This would be worse because Tim left to protect them. He made a conscious decision to put everyone's safety before his own, even though they were the ones who were supposed to be protecting him.

They all stood in silence for a moment. Then something clicked in Roger. He walked over to Abby. "Pull up Tim's letter to you."

"What? Why?" She looked at him and then at Gibbs who nodded. She did as she was asked.

"'No more substitutes.' Substitutes. Both he and Nate said that." Roger turned to look at everyone. "They both used the same term." He started pacing and speaking softly to himself.

"Oh, dear." Ducky looked at Abby and Jimmy. "Did either of you mention our theory in autopsy from several days ago?"

The Goth and the Gremlin looked at each other, then back at Ducky and responded the same. "No."

"Then how did he know about the possibility of substitutes?"

Tony started to ask what they were talking about when Roger spoke out. "IPSCO! Of course!" He turned and looked at everyone.

"Who is that?" Ziva asked.

"Its not a who, its a what. **I**nterstate **P**aper **S**upply **CO**mpany."

They all looked at him blankly.

"After the high dive prank, Mr. Nast, our gym teacher, kept Tim close to him at all times. We all guessed that Tim had told him what was going on. For about two weeks, Tim was never alone, if it wasn't Mr. Nast, it was one of the other teachers. It made sense since all the teachers seemed to love Tim."

"However, it made Theodore furious. He said that Tim shouldn't be hiding behind anyone. He wasn't supposed to be a coward. We were ready to move on, but Theodore wouldn't let it go, said he had a plan that would not only get Tim back in a position to be teased, but would also test his resolve."

"What happened?" Gibbs asked as he walked up to Roger, worried about what he would hear.

"I don't know. None of us were allowed to go. Theodore said it was between him and Tim. After the weekend, we were back in full force bullying Tim, but this time he didn't go to the teachers for help. When I asked Theodore how he did it, he just said that a hero would never let a substitute take his place when it was time to deal out punishment and pain."

Things were starting to click for Gibbs too. "That's what his nightmares were about and why he said he knew better than to say anything about the bullying. He was taking it so someone else wouldn't have to."

"Right. I don't know all of what happened, or who the substitute was. One day, before we got our hands on Tim, Nate suggested to take him to the IPSCO plant for some fun. Theodore said no, that it was a place special to him and Tim. Only the two of them were allowed to ever go back there."

Gibbs wanted both to hear more and nothing at the same time. He settled for nothing, the past was the past, Tim needed him in the here and now. "Abby, run a check to see if there are any of those warehouses in the DC area."

In a meek voice, she answered him. "I don't have to Gibbs. IPSCO was the password. Its about half an hour from here." She looked at him terrified. "He's been gone so long, Theodore could have ... he ..."

He wanted to reassure her, but this time he couldn't. He turned from her and addressed the rest of his team. "Gear up. I want us to be ready for an all out assault. Staff Sergeant, same with you and your men. I plan on going in hard and fast."

Roger nodded to him.

Gibbs turned to Ducky. "I want you outside. Do not come in until I give the okay, understood."

"Do you really think you will need our services Jethro?"

"Absolutely." Gibbs was pulling out his Sig and checking for ammunition and grabbing extra, as were Tony and Ziva.

"Gibbs ..." Vance started to warn as Gibbs walked toward the outside elevators.

"Director, an armed felon and murder has taken one of my agents hostage and has made it abundantly clear that he will take out anyone in his way. Do you really think this is going to end peacefully?" Gibbs said with a bite in his voice.

Vance didn't flinch, he knew a father's protectiveness when he saw it. "Just make it clean."

Everyone piled into the elevator. Gibbs turned, met Vance's eyes and nodded as the elevator doors closed.


	32. Chapter 32

I know that I've said this many times, but again, thank you for all of your reviews. I thought this was a decent story idea, but to have your peers give you such astounding feedback ... there are no words that can express my gratitude.

Disclaimer: The only thing I own are the characters I created for the story. The rest belongs to other more fortunate than I.

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><p>In a mere fifteen minutes, they were at the warehouse. They split into three teams of two; Gibbs and DiNozzo; David and Masterson; Ferris and Williams.<p>

Duck and Palmer pulled up just as the teams went in, with two other teams of NCIS agents and all of Roger's division on the way to give back up.

They went in quietly but searched quickly. Five minutes in, Roger spotted an elevated platform with a figure laying face down on a workbench. He motioned for Williams to stay on the floor, while he went up to investigate.

As he got closer, he realize the figure was Tim. He rushed to him and did a quick sweep of the area. No one else was there. He bent down and tried to get a response from McGee. "Hey, Tim. Hey! Come on, wake up."

Tim's green eyes opened slowly, as if they were heavy and when he spoke and his speech was slurred. "R-roooogerr-r?"

"Yeah, it's me. Let's get you out of here." He bent down to see under the bench. Tim's arms were tied at the wrists and then attached to a leg of the bench.

"Nnnoo. R-ruun. G-get ... get ouuut o hereeee."

Roger stopped and looked directly into Tim's dilated eyes. "Not happening. I am not leaving you behind this time." He looked under the bench again and tried to reach the end of the roped tied to the leg, until he heard Williams call out to him. He looked up just in time to see an object being swung at him.

It hit him on his right temple. As he rolled down off the platform, a gun shot was the last thing he heard before he blacked out.

XXXX

The other two teams rushed to where the gun shots were coming from and converged at the same time.

Roger was lying face up on the floor, an open wound on his temple. Williams was trying to treat a wound on his arm.

The four glanced at each other, but before any decision could be made, a shot came from the platform. They all squatted down and looked up to where the shots had come from.

A tall man with blond hair and dark eyes was firing at them. He would have been incredibly good looking, if it weren't for the crazed look in his eyes. It was enough to even make Gibbs pause with an uneasy feeling.

Theodore was sitting on the bench, he had released Tim's arms and was holding him close. Tim had no control of himself. His head was resting on Theodore's shoulder and as Theodore pulled him closer, his mouth was pushed up against the man's neck, making it hard to breath.

Everyone took aim at Theodore, but he was using Tim as a shield, no one could get a clear shot.

Tim pulled his mouth away, so he could breath and speak. "Theeeeeodooore, pl-pleeese do't hurt ..." Drugs still heavy in his system kept Tim voice quiet, only Theodore could hear him.

Theodore shifted his eyes down. "Sorry Timothy I can't let them go. They will pull us apart again."

McGee tried to clear his head by shaking it a little and blinking rapidly. _Come on Tim, snap out of it! THINK! Don't you dare let him hurt someone else. _He was frantically trying to come up with something. One of his arms was behind Theodore and he felt around, trying to get his control back. His hand butted up against something, it was the hilt of the knife that Theodore had used to cut him free of the ropes. An idea finally came to mind.

XXXX

When Theodore's attention was on McGee, Gibbs took advantage and stepped away from the group, DiNozzo right behind him. Masterson ran over to Williams and Ziva stayed as cover for Roger.

"Let him go. You know there's no way out." Gibbs inched forward hoping to find an opening.

Theodore focused back on his opponents. "No. We have waited too long for this. We are not letting you stop us."

"Do you really think you speak for Tim on that?"

"TIMOTHY! Do **NOT** disrespect him!" Theodore bellowed.

Gibbs paused. He really didn't know how to handle this situation. Terrorists with guns, criminals holding a hostage, the SecNav being a pain in his ass; he knew what to say for any of that, but a stark raving mad lunatic, that was new territory. _Maybe I should let Ducky come in and try?_

Theodore's gaze shift down to Tim again. "You can't really do anything about it right now. ... I know this will make us even, but _**they **_won't stop coming after us."

"That's right Theodore." Gibbs grabbed his attention back. "So just put the gun down before you get Tim hurt."

Theodore was going to reprimand Gibbs again for not using Tim's proper full name, when the man in his arms started speaking again. "Oh really? What?"

Gibbs inched even closer.

Theodore frowned. "Why would you do that? Heroes aren't supposed suggest such a thing."

That made Gibbs pause. He narrowed his eyes and wished Tim was facing him so he could read his lips.

Theodore looked up again and pulled Tim closer as he talked, while keeping the gun aimed at Gibbs, then DiNozzo and back. "I guess that makes sense. Do they really mean that much to you?"

_What the hell is Tim saying to him?_

"I heard about that."

"Hey Teddy, why don't you keep your focus on me?" Tony said. He was also very uncomfortable with the conversation Tim and Theodore were having. _Damn it! I wish we could hear what McGee was saying!_

Theodore immediately snapped his attention, and the gun, to Tony. "What did you call me?"

_Ah, a sore spot._ Tony thought as he grinned. "You heard me, Ted, Teddy, Teddy-bear."

Theodore was going to shoot, but Tim put a hand on his wrist, pausing him. Theodore's eyes didn't shift down this time, but he listened to what Tim was saying. "How?"

"_How, what?"_ Both Gibbs and DiNozzo thought as they exchanged a look.

Tim's arm was starting to shake with effort, but he never let go. When he was done, Theodore turned a soft gaze to him. "You'd really do that?"

Gibbs gut was churning. "McGee what the hell are you saying!"

Theodore was no longer paying attention to anyone but Tim. "That's why you're the hero Timothy. When?"

"When what? Theodore! ... McGee!" Gibbs gut was in knots. All the sudden the snippets of conversation, recent and past, added up and Gibbs knew what McGee was planning. "Don't you dare, McGee!"

Tim smiled softly. He was too weak to push the gun down, so it was more of guiding Theodore's arm, positioning the gun at just the right angle. He felt Theodore's body tense and knew it was time. He held the knife straight and as firm as he could as the two of them fell off the back of the work bench, a single gun shot sounding out.

XXXX

For the rest of the team, it all happened in slow motion, but incredibly fast at the same time. They saw Tim make Theodore lower the gun, however, it was pointing right at his abdomen. Then watched in horror as the two fell backwards as a the gun went off.

Gibbs and DiNozzo ran to the two men, it seemed to take forever to reach them. Ziva wanted to go, but her training told her to stay with Roger, who was just starting to come around.

When Gibbs and Tony reached Tim, he was lying on top of Theodore. Gibbs reached out and pulled Tim off and cradled him. He noticed the gun shot wound and put pressure on it with his free hand. "Ziva! Get Ducky in here now! Come on Tim, open your eyes! That's an order, goddamn it!"

Theodore lulled his head over to see Tim. With a knife stuck in his back, puncturing his lung and slicing one of his pulmonary arteries, Theodore knew his time was running out, but so was Tim's. That was the idea ... to go together, bound forever in death. He moved his eyes down to the two blood streams, combining and mixing; never to be separated again. He smiled this was the happiest and most content he had been since that day in the woods many years ago, when he got to be 'one' with Tim.

Theodore closed his eyes and let the darkness take him. The last thing he heard was Gibbs. "Timothy McGee you do not have permission to die! Do you hear me? Now open your eyes!"

Tony watched the flaxen-haired man take his last breath as McGee opened his eyes.

"B-b-boooosssss?"

"Yeah, Tim I'm here." Ducky had arrived and was taking care of the wound the best he could while Palmer called for an ambulance. Gibbs' bloody hand turned Tim's face to him. "Do you remember what I told you the day I brought you on to my team?" Gibbs would never admit to the shaking of his hand, both Tony and Ducky would never admit to seeing it.

Tim's eye were glassy and unfocused. "B-b-oosss?"

"I told you that you belonged to me."

"I-I r-r-emember." Darkness was closing in on the sides of Tim's vision. He had hoped that he had aimed the gun enough that that it hadn't hit anything vital, he must have miscalculated.

"That still holds, Tim. You belong to me. Not to your father and not to Theodore, to me. Do you understand?"

"B-b-booossssss?" Everything was become difficult. Seeing, hearing, talking.

"That means that you cannot leave my team until I say so. You do not have permission to leave, you do not have permission to die. Is that understood?"

"D-dn't meann t-too. Guesssss, po-pointtted wwrg."

That brought a small smile to Gibbs. Knowing that Tim had been trying to survive helped ease some of the heaviness in his chest, but not much. "After all these years and I still need to work on your aim."

McGee tried to laugh, but it came out more of a puff of air. "P-p-ersnl l-lessssonsss?"

"Of course son. **When** you get better, I'll turn you into the best sniper NCIS has seen since me." Gibbs' voice was low and comforting. He was trying very hard to not see how much blood was being lost.

Tony was standing against the wall, as if distance could change reality. Ziva was the opposite, she wanted to be close, to confirm the reality in front of her. The three Airmen were right behind her.

It was getting too hard to keep his eyes open. He couldn't really see anything anyway, just Gibbs' ice blue eyes. "Prms?"

"Yeah, Tim. I promise. But, you have to promise me that you'll keep fighting to live. That's a direct order." Gibbs could feel the life draining out of him. _Where the hell is that damn ambulance?_ "Do you hear me?"

Tim wanted to say he did, but he couldn't remember what words were anymore. He gave Gibbs a small smile and nodded. However, his eyes closed and darkness crept closer. As he faded into nothingness, he could hear Gibbs reminding him to keep fighting. Then there was nothing but the dark.

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><p>Sorry about the shorter chapter, but I had to leave you hanging. evil laugh<br>See you tomorrow.


	33. Chapter 33

Gibbs sat in the waiting room, staring at his empty cup of coffee. It had been three hours since they had arrived at the hospital, still no word on Tim's condition.

He took a moment to look around the waiting room. Tony was still keeping his distance, staring out a far window. Abby was holding onto Ducky, she had tried with Gibbs, but he couldn't offer the comfort she needed. Jimmy was on the other side of Abby, ready to take over for Ducky, if need be. Ziva was sitting next to him, quietly studying her hands.

Across from him were the Airmen. Ferris had a bandage on his head and had been diagnosed with a mild concussion. The doctors had wanted to keep him for observation. He told them that he would be right in the waiting room since he wasn't going anywhere until he knew the status of the NCIS agent who had been brought in. Reluctantly, the doctors agreed and let him check out AMA.

Williams had a bullet dug out of his arm, but otherwise was fine. He, too, refused observation. Masterson stood, with a watchful eye over his comrades.

The eight of them waited in silence. Knowing nothing they could say to each other would help until they knew if Tim was going to make it.

After another hour, a doctor in bloody scrubs came out. "Timothy McGee?"

Everyone who was sitting stood and approached the doctor.

Gibbs address him. "That's us."

"Jethro Gibbs?"

"Yes."

The doctor nodded. "You have been listed as his medical proxy. Do you wish to talk in private?"

Gibbs didn't trust himself to speak, so he just shook is head.

"Okay. I'm Dr. Wisen. I have been with Tim since he came into the OR. He had a through and through GSW that tore through his small intestines. We had to perform a laparotomy by resection of..."

"In English please?" Gibbs didn't want to waste time by needing to have Ducky translate.

Dr. Wisen smiled knowingly. "We cut out the parts that were damaged and sewed it back together."

"You mean like when you lose a button on your shirt?" Abby tried to wrap her head around what had been done to her friend.

"More like when you want to make a long sleeve into a short sleeve shirt." The doctor gave with a bit of mirth. "He has lost some of his small intestine. The blood loss was the most worrying, he lost a lot in a short amount of time. Luckily, there were no other injuries to cause complications."

"So what are you saying?" _Why can't doctors ever just give it to you straight._

The doctor smiled more. "He should make a full recovery, as long as he doesn't try to do too much before he is ready."

There was a collective sigh of relief through the whole room.

Gibbs had another question to ask, but was cut off by Abby. "When can we see him?"

"He will be moved into a room with in the next hour. Since Mr. Gibbs ..."

"Agent."

The doctor looked at Gibbs. "Of course. Agent Gibbs is medical proxy and emergency contact, it will be his decision. However, ..." the doctor's voice rose when everyone looked like they were ready to bolt down the hallway. "... he will be asleep for the rest of the day and probably most of tomorrow. Do not wake him needlessly. He needs his rest. When he is awake, keep the visits to a minimum until he gets stronger." He gave a hard look to everyone in the room.

Before anyone else could interrupt, Gibbs asked the question he had been dreading. "You said there were no other injuries?"

The doctors sighed. "I said there were no other injuries that caused complications." He knew what Gibbs was asking, but wasn't sure if he should say anything in a room full of people.

"What other injuries did he have?"

"Maybe we should talk about this in my office?"

Gibbs shook his head. "What other injuries? Was he ..." Gibbs couldn't voice the words.

The doctor focused solely on him. "Yes, I'm afraid he was. During the operation, we noticed rectal penetration, tearing and bleeding. The tearing was minor and should heal on its own. Once the surgery was done, we completed an SAE. We have it ready to turn over to what ever investigative authority you would like."

The atmosphere of relief changed into quiet horror as everyone realized what had gone on before they got there.

Gibbs knew everyone needed to see Tim, but he also knew they needed something to occupy their thoughts and time until he regained consciousness.

"Thank you doctor, you can had it over to Agent DiNozzo."

Tony tore his gaze away from the doctor. "Boss ..."

Gibbs closed his eyes for a moment. When he reopened them, he turned around and looked at everyone. "You heard the doctor, Tim isn't going to wake up until sometime tomorrow. I want this case put to bed by then." He looked at Tony first. "You will take Abby back to the lab. Process the SAE kit, along with all of the other evidence. Once it is complete, you will turn it over to the Air Force."

He then turned to Ziva. "You will be the Air Force's escort while they are in the building. Give them access to what ever they need. Ducky, I think you and Palmer have an autopsy waiting."

Everyone was stunned. Only Ziva seemed to understand what Gibbs was doing, but she still didn't like it. "Very well Gibbs, what will you be doing?"

"I will be here. Any more questions?" He could see the protest in everyone's eyes.

Abby frown, sighed and walked to him but gave him hug. "You call us as soon as he wakes up."

This time, he returned the hug and kiss her on the top of her head. "Sure thing, Abs." He looked at everyone. "So you all better be done by the time he comes around. Understand."

This time, everyone nodded and slowly left, except for Ducky. He shooed Jimmy along with the rest, wanting a private word with his friend. "Are you alright Jethro."

Gibbs pinched the bridge of his nose. "No, Duck. I'm not."

Ducky put a hand on Gibbs arm. "Don't worry. He will pull through this stronger than ever. You'll see."

Gibbs looked down at him. "How can you be so sure?"

Ducky smiled. "Because, this time, he has his family to help him." He stayed for a minute more, letting the truth of his words sink in, then he too left.

Gibbs stood still for just a moment, then strode to Tim's room.

He sat down at bedside and took a moment to look over his agent. Tim was pale and somehow looked small lying in a hospital bed.

Gibbs leaned over, grabbed Tim's hand, and whispered in his ear. "You're doing a good job, son. Now keep it up. None of us are going to be okay until you open your eyes and talk to us. So you better get better sooner rather than later. You hear me?" He gave Tim's hand a squeeze and waited to see if he would get a reaction. He did not.

He sat back and waited, however he never let go of Tim's hand. He wanted Tim to know that he wasn't alone, that he would never have to face anything alone again.

XXXX

True to the doctors words, Tim slept the rest of the day and all through the next. It was on the third day when he choose to open his eyes. He blinked, trying to get the room to focus. He felt someone squeeze his hand and looked over to see who it was.

Gibbs gave a soft smile. "'Bout time."

Tim smiled back and blinked again. He wanted to say something, but words seem foreign to him.

Gibbs raised the bed slowly and brought a cup with a straw for Tim. "Drink it slowly."

Tim did as directed and nodded when he was done. "Thanks, Boss." Came the raspy reply.

"How you feeling?"

Tim took a moment to take stock of his body. His abdomen was sore, but in a blunted way. _Pain killers. Why am I ..._ The realization of what had taken place came back to McGee in a rush. He gave a sharp in take of air and his eyes started to water.

"Hey, you okay? You in pain?" Gibbs asked worriedly.

McGee shook his head. "I just ..." He looked over to Gibbs. "I'm sorry Boss."

Gibbs scooted closer. "What do have to be sorry about?"

"Going off on my own. I just couldn't..." He paused to take a pained breath. "... put any of you in that kind of danger."

"We are always in that kind of danger Tim. Comes with the job. I'm sorry that you didn't feel that you could trust us to ..."

McGee gave a strong squeeze to the hand that had still had not let go. "No, no, no. It was never about not being able to trust you." Another pause. "I trust you guys with my life. I just had to ..."

"Protect us?"

Tim turned away and closed his eyes. "Yeah. This was something from my past. I couldn't bear the thought of dragging you guys into it. Especially if Theodore had gotten a hold of one of you." He took as deep of a breath as he could.

"Hey, look at me."

Tim did as requested.

Gibbs got up from the chair and sat on the edge of Tim's bed. He reached out and gave the lightest head-slap ever. "I want you to listen very carefully to everything I'm going to say. No interruptions."

Tim just started at Gibbs.

"We are a team, Tim. Before anything else. When it came up that Tony may have put an innocent man in jail, didn't we all work together to make it right for him?" Tim tried to say something, but received another head-slap. "I said no interruptions. When Ziva's father has turned her life upside down, weren't we all there for her too?"

McGee nodded, not sure where Gibbs was going.

"Did you ever feel dragged into those situations, those cases?"

Tim blinked at him.

"Well?"

"No. But ..."

"What? This was different? Because it was you?" Gibbs watched the reaction play in Tim's eyes. "You are part of the team. That mean we will be dragged into anything **with** you. Understand?"

He could see that McGee desperately wanted to believe him. That he wasn't still just some outsider looking in, but something was holding him back. Gibbs had a pretty good idea what it was, so he decided to lay everything out in the open. "I know what happened in Mexico, Tim. I'm not angry."

"I let you down. I let Abby get into a dangerous situation. What if Reynosa would have opened fire?" A pained breath. "What if she would have taken Abby? All because I'm spineless."

"What if she would have taken you?"

"It wouldn't have mattered."

Instead of a head-slap, Gibbs grabbed the back of Tim's neck and forced him to look right into his eyes. "That's where you're wrong, Tim. It would have mattered to Abby, to Tony and Ziva, to me. If she would have laid one finger on either of you, I would have turned Mexico upside down in order to make her pay."

"Why? Why for me?"

Gibbs squeezed both the back of Tim's neck and his hand. "Because you are important to us. Not just as the computer guy on the team, but to _**us**_. If we've never proven it before, this week should have." He saw the tears welling up in Tim's eyes.

"I want ..." McGee took a breath trying to control his pending breakdown. "I'm not important. People are important to me, like Sarah and you guys. That is why I have to protect you."

"And that is why we want to protect you, Tim. It goes both ways, always has." Gibbs watched as Tim digested what he had said. He could tell that Tim was almost ready to accept what Gibbs had told him, he needed just one more push.

"You don't ever have to go through anything alone again. We will be there every step of the way." He gave another squeeze to Tim's neck. "What happened to you is horrid. No one should ever have to go through something like that. Not when you were a kid, and not now."

"Boss?"

"I know Tim."

Tim looked horrified. He started to struggle to get away from Gibbs.

"Hey, hey! Calm down! You're going to re-open your stitches!"

"How can you stand to look at me? To touch me?" He was beginning to shake.

"Because what has happened to you isn't your fault. Because it hasn't changed who you are. Because you'll still be willing to fight against all that we do while still trying to find the best in everyone first. Because you are still one of the best people I have ever met. Because, you are a good man Timothy McGee, and one that I am proud to know."

The tears starting flowing. "Why? Why? Why?"

Gibbs pulled him into an embrace and let him cry it out. He knew Tim was asking why for a lot of different things. Why couldn't his own father have been like this? Why did Theodore do these terrible thing to him? Why did he mean so much to the team? Gibbs held him and stroked the back of his head, quietly speaking.

"I promise, you will never face anything alone again. Not as long as you are on my team. Hell, not as long as I'm alive. I promise son."

Tim just held on and cried himself back to sleep. Gibbs held him for longer. When he finally laid Tim down, he still kept a hold of his hand. Gibbs brushed Tim's hair out of his eyes and carefully studied his face. Tim actually looked peaceful now, instead of the drug induced slumber of before.

"I will always watch out for you. All of you."

Gibbs settled himself back into his chair, again never letting go of Tim's hand.

* * *

><p>I hope that I wasn't too off on the medical jargon. I did research some, but was getting lost on what I was actually reading. (Thank goodness Gibbs doesn't like long explanations! LOL!)<br>One more chapter to go!


	34. Chapter 34

Here we go, the last chapter

Disclaimer: You all know the drill - I own nothing & am not making any money, just having some fun.

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><p>McGee stayed in the hospital for a week. He would have been discharged sooner, but the doctors insisted on monitoring his slight case of malnutrition.<p>

During that week, he gave his statement of what happened when he arrived at the warehouse. He had seen a slumped over body, thinking it was the next 'Timothy' victim. After clearing the immediate area, he bent down to check on the victim, only to have a syringe plunged into his arm. I didn't knock him out, but made him unable to fight back when Theodore assaulted him, then dressed him, and tied him to the workbench. When he realized his team had come for him, he wanted to make sure nobody else got hurt by Theodore and came up with the plan to 'go together'.

The body of the last victim was found in what used to be the supervisor's office. It was hard for McGee to hear that he couldn't save the last Timothy taken.

Every day, the team came to visit. Abby chatted a mile a minute about everything from her Mass Spectrometer to what the gang was eating to what the new treats were in the vending machine.

Tony brought movies that he swore Tim _**just**_ had to see. They usually spent the entire time 'arguing', at least until Tim fell asleep part way through. Tony would always stay until Tim woke again, to make sure he knew that he was not being left alone.

Ducky and Jimmy were Tim's personal medical care experts. He would smile quietly while Ducky debated the best course of his treatment, while Jimmy tried awkwardly keep up a conversation.

Ziva eased Tim through his fears and nightmares. At first, he was reluctant to talk about it, because, according to him, what did two days compare to four months. Ziva decided to talk about the first time she was assaulted, how she felt at the time, the minutes and days after. It got Tim talking. Their friendship had already taken a closer turn, and this pull them even more so.

At first, Abby was very jealous of this, but once Tim reassured her that she would always have a special place in his heart, she was fine with it ... mostly.

Gibbs was there for all the in betweens, if not in person, by phone. It took a few head-slaps before Tim understood it was okay to reach out. It took just short of a concussion, but he finally got it.

It was a long time coming, but Timothy McGee finally realized that he was just as important to his team, to his family, as they were to him.

XXXX

As the week drew to a close, it was agreed to let McGee be discharged, but only into someone's care. Gibbs made it very clear, that Tim would be going to his place until the all clear was given by Ducky. Much to a blushing McGee's embarrassment.

As Tim sat on his bed, waiting for his discharge papers to get signed, a soft knock came from the door. "Come in."

Roger walked in tentatively. "Hello Agent McGee. How are you feeling?"

_Still Agent McGee._ Tim smiled. "Better now that I'm getting out of here. You?" He gestured towards the stitches on the side of Roger's head.

Roger smiled. "This. It's nothing. I've got a really hard head. Just ask my CO."

The both had a laugh. Tim looked up at him. "What brings you by?"

"I wanted to let you know that the case has finally been completely closed. Theodore was tied to the murder of all six Timothys."

McGee hung his head. "Yeah, six."

Roger took another step into the room. "Hey, none of that was your fault."

McGee just shrugged and watched his feet.

Roger sighed. "Also, Nate is being put in a facility that handles mentally unstable criminals."

"Someone finally caught on."

"Yeah well, when you start demanding to meet 'the combined perfect being you helped to create' it makes the right kind of people take notice."

"I wonder how he thought we'd turn out?"

"Maybe like Two-Face from Batman?"

Tim gave a small laugh at that. "You're stealing Tony's lines."

An uncomfortable lull came when neither man knew what to say. Roger broke the silence. "I'm glad you're going to be okay Agent McGee." He turned and started to leave.

"Roger?"

"Yes, sir?"

"Why?"

"Sir?"

"Why did Theodore do that stuff to me? Why did you let him? Why did you care so much now? Why?"

Roger turned back and step closer, noticing that Tim didn't appear to be shrinking back from him anymore. "Permission to sit sir?"

Tim nodded.

Roger sat in a chair near bedside, took his cap off and ran his hand through his hair. "As for Theodore, I can't answer that. It's something I hope that I'll never be able to understand. As for me ..."

Tim finally looked up to met Roger's eyes. "I was a dumb kid, who like the fact that I had some power."

"But your family was good to you."

"Yes they were. I had a pretty big family. Two older brothers plus twin younger brother and sister. I felt lost in the shuffle. Bullying you gave me that sense of doing something that made me stand out, even though I was running around with four other kids." Roger shook his head.

"And now?"

"And now I realize how dumb I had been. None of that made me stand out."

"I never forgot."

Roger gave a sad smile. "That is not anything I would want to be remembered for." He looked at Tim's intense green eyes and found that there was no hate and no fear, just the willingness to understand. He still couldn't believe that someone like Timothy McGee even existed. "You know that I was at Matt's house while you were tutoring him, right?"

"Yeah, Matt talked about you a lot, even though I never saw you there."

"I made sure to hide." He took a deep breath. "You never held it against him that we were related."

Tim shrugged. "Not his fault."

"Why didn't you out me?"

"What do you mean?"

"I heard when Matt told you who I was to him. He asked if you knew me, and you said no. Why?"

Tim shrugged. "He looked up to you so much, even though you were younger than him. I couldn't take that away from him."

"That's the answer to one of your questions."

McGee just looked at him quizzically.

"You thought of his feelings before your own. You could have gotten some measure of revenge by telling Matt all the terrible things I had done, or let happen to you. You didn't, you stayed his tutor and even became his friend."

Again, Tim shrugged. "It's not that important ..."

"But it is Agent McGee. You have something special inside you that wants to help others, regardless of how much you've been kicked down. You never loose sight of that, and you never let anyone pay for someone else's mistakes. In the world we live in, that _**is**_ pretty important."

McGee studied Roger for a moment and let a small smile come to his face and eyes. He just nodded at Roger.

Roger smiled back and stood to go. He turned to leave when Tim's voice called him back.

"Roger?"

He turned back to see Tim with his hand out stretched, which took him by surprise.

"I wanted to say thank you for all of your help with this case."

Roger was actually a little embarrassed. "Agent McGee ..."

"Tim."

Roger looked from McGee's out stretched hand to his eyes and back. He slowly walked over and grasped it in a firm handshake. "Anytime Agent ..."

McGee raised an eyebrow at him.

Roger chuckled. "... Tim, anytime."

McGee nodded at him. Roger released his hand and left.

Outside he ran into Gibbs. "You were listening?"

"Of course."

Roger smiled wide. "I'm glad he knows people like you. You take good care of him."

"Plan on it."

The Airman and the agent nodded to each other. Roger left the hospital with his men. No other mission had ever made him feel more satisfied than this. It wasn't just because Tim forgave him, forgiveness wasn't what he was looking for. It was because he helped prevent a good man from being destroyed. A good man, three simple words that described Timothy McGee to a tee.

XXXX

Gibbs gave Tim a moment to collect himself before he went in. "You ready to go." He asked as he opened the door.

"Way ready!" McGee enthusiastically replied. He was wearing a smile that went all the way to his eyes, until he saw the wheelchair. "Boss?"

"Sorry Tim. SOP." Gibbs grinned at his embarrassment. "Hop on."

McGee sighed and did as instructed. "You know, Boss, I'd really be okay at my place. You don't have to ..."

A head-slap was Gibbs response.

As Tim rubbed his head, he smiled wide.

XXXX

The ride to Gibbs' was silent, but comfortably so. When they got there, it was no surprise to see Gibbs' driveway littered with cars.

Gibbs and McGee got out of the car together. Gibbs was at Tim's elbow before he could take a step on his own. "If they get to much, let me know and I'll put an end to the festivities."

"Okay, Boss." Tim smiled, knowing there was no way he was going to put a damper on tonight. He was just as happy to be here as the rest of them.

Gibbs gave him a side ways glance. "Un-uh." He knew he would be watching Tim carefully tonight, to make sure he didn't overexert himself. However, he hid his smile at seeing the excitement in his agent's eyes.

Abby opened the door and flew to them before they could even take two steps. "Easy Abby!" Gibbs warned.

"I know, I know! I'm just so happy to have you here Tim." She hugged, extra lightly.

Tim squeeze her back. "Me too." They both knew she meant more than just at Gibbs' house.

The three walked into the house, meeting up with the rest of the gang.

"So McPatient, are you done with drawing out your hospital stay?" Tony smirked, although everyone could see that he was bouncing on his toes as he stood in the kitchen door way.

"I'd be careful what you say to me DiNozzo, I've got connections in high places."

"What connections?"

McGee smiled as milk was poured over Tony's head. He had seen Ziva give him a wicked wink when he walked through the door and knew instantly what she was up to, as she stealthily slipped behind Tony.

"W-Wh-What ..."

Everyone was laughing.

"Boss! Are you going to let them get away with this!"

"Just clean up after yourself, DiNozzo."

"Aw, boss, that's not fair!"

Abby had grabbed two mops and a bucket. "We'll help."

Gibbs and Ducky watched as Tim tried to mop up Tony and sent everyone into fits of laughter. They looked at each other and smiled.

When the clean up was done and Tony had changed into new clothes, they were all sitting in the living room ready to watch the last two movies of the saga.

Tim was not allowed to sit on the floor so, for this one occasion, Jethro the dog, was allowed on the couch. Gibbs was to his right and Ducky took the large chair. Everyone else sat on folding chairs. The movie started along with the chatter and debating.

Half way through the last movie of the saga, Gibbs felt a familiar weight on his shoulder. He looked over to see Tim sound asleep. He turned back to the movie and smiled.

When the movie was done, everyone left quietly and Gibbs let Tim stretch out on the couch.

As he covered him up, sleepy green eyes opened for a moment. "Thanks for everything, Boss."

Gibbs laid a hand on Tim's head. "Anytime, Tim. You know that now, right."

McGee gave a sleepy smile. "Yes, Boss."

"Then go back to sleep."

Tim nodded and with a feeling of safety that he only felt at Gibbs', he fell right back to sleep.

Gibbs watched Tim while he slept, replaying moments from the day they met until now. Gibbs knew where there were missed opportunities with Tim, but was grateful to have a chance to change that.

Roger's words about Tim came back to him. _"That is why I am here. Not because I am looking for forgiveness, not because of anything I can gain for myself. But because a good man is in danger. A good man who has and will change lives. I will do anything to protect him from harm. Anything."_

_That goes for us too._ Gibbs watched for a moment more and then turned to go upstairs. Secure in the knowledge that all was right with his team ... his family.

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><p>Thank you to all who have read, alerted, followed &amp; reviewed. You guys made my day with your encouragement and pointers! So much so that I am in the process of a second story. It is completely separate from this one, though. I hope you will join me when I get ready to post it. (Although with the holidays coming up, I don't expect to get much writing done, so it probably won't be ready until the new year.)<p>

Again, thank you. Happy reading, writing & watching! (Tomorrow is Tim's big episode! I can't wait!)


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